New diary

Hi Graham

Thanks for your post on my diary, just wanted to say i was chatting to Ken L and Mattie on SH last night whcih was realy good.

Anyway young man, take care and thanks again for all your support over the last 126 days, you have always been there for me and i will never forget that.........Andrew

ps, one day i will be down your neck of the woods and i will buy you a pint or 2 thats for sure.

High five!

Hope you are happy today, cos you deserve to be all happy and that.

Hope to catch up with you soon,

f x

Hi Graham

Thanks for popping by on my diary, hope you are ok and having a good weekend.

Take care mate, ands

Hello young man,

Thanks for posting on my diary, your posts kinda make me smile, hope you are ok down there in the SW... Your last post about the lady you where refering to sounds sad and i know how she feels as you do too! Did however, not realise writing out bad cheques in the US is illegal, hope she does not get into to much trouble, can see why your thoughts are with her....

You do amaze me, how your recovery has gone and the way in which you offer so much support!

So as always a very big thankyou to you, your a sound guy and your support and kindness is very much appreciated.

Take care mate, ands

Well realised that I have not posted for so long. Nothing much to say. Recovery seems like auto pilot now. Don`t think that i have had an urge all year. I guess my " new thinking " regarding money is doing it`s job. In a way I am much more careful with money and look at ways of saving it. A bit obsessed but I will have that any time over gambling.

Seeing some posts on here that are making me smile, some posts that don`t.

A couple of mates spring to mind, Ands and DT, you guys have come so far.

Well the joys of high winds, cold and heavy rain is upon us. How I so dislike the dark, long nights and days where it never really seems to get light.

Anyway just thought I would stop by. Here`s to a gamble free week.

Good to hear you are plodding on Graham,

I feel much the same, I don't feel as much of a need to write on my diary these days either.

Hope you haven't been skiving off your IT course mind! 🙂

I cant be bothered to do anything today, get so sluggish in the winter!

Catch you soon,

f x

Hi Graham,

I just wanted to drop in and offer my thanks to you for all the genuine support you have given me and many, many others on this forum.

Your post to Georgie Girl was genuinely humbling to read.

You are one special fella to help as much as you do.

Thankyou and warmest regards,

DT.

Graham,

thank you for writing that post to Georgie. It was beautifully written, and Im so glad you were able to voice what she needed to hear.

Your kindness and compassion is beautiful. Dont go changing, my lovely!

Take care,

f x

Thanks for your kind posts. I need to be transparent. I am not ST. Graham, I get more out of supporting others than you will ever know. I have seen so much pain caused by gambling. As a friend say, insanity, prison and death and maybe all those three.

The recent stuff that`s been going on is a shame. My way of thinking is that what ever supplies the solution for the person with the gambling problem is fine by me. I have never been to GA but here some good things and know people who feel that it has been paramount in their recovery.

The question to ask is the desire to quit stronger than the desire to bet? That was the question after 5 years of gambling, sadly it took a further 15 years for the answer to be different.

Soooo, the GA or not debate. Dunno, don`t care as long as both sides ( as it were ) respect each others opinion.

A great last post my friend, as usual you put it so well.

I am sad there has been upheaval recently as this has always been my sanctuary ans tho I dont post on my own thread so much now I like to offer support where I think I might be useful.

take care

W xx

Hello young man,

Thanks for popping by and posting on my diary, means alot to mean..but you know that anyway lol! Your post made me smile, yes i have started to smile again...thanks for being there in my dark days and for all your kindness!

Graham you are a sound guy, those emails you sent me realy helped and so did the chats on SH.

Start my new job next monday working for Greenwich council, database adminstrator, not the most exciting job but its a start!!

Take care mate and thanks again, your dim buddy in recovery... ands

Chat. Quite a few were upset that on Friday we didn`t have chat. Spoke last evening to one or two folk about arranging our own chats. Their is a website that has a chat room or rather more than one that can be used for additional chats if you feel you want one. Understand it will not be moderated but I think we are all adult enough to handle that, lol.

The site in question is a gamblers support site so it will be user friendly.

I have a few ideas on it so as requested, post your interest and we can talk about it.

I would be up for that Graham,

I wonder if Wednesday evenings would be a good one, what with there being no chat on here cancelled or not.

Anyway, Im sticking my arm in the air matey.

f x

Well folks worried and upset here. Bomb shell hit us on Friday night. My brother in law has announced he is leaving my Misses sister. Been married in January 30 years.

It seems he has some much younger gal, well usual thing I guess for some blokes, but it is complicated. They are both 50. Shees , this hard to get down. bear with me.

OK best explain. I have no brothers or sisters and sis-in-law is like a sister to me, known here since was 13 so I am very protective. This has come out of the blue although P, my sis in law has said things have been a bit odd for months. My niece saw a message on his mobile and confronted him, she is 23 and her and I are very close. She`s my God daughter also. He lied to her about, well no surprise there. Anyway he confessed, said he didn`t love P any more and asked her to move out of their bedroom having admitted that he is in love with this 35 year old. Darn cheek of him. Anyway, he has moved out now, we don`t know where. Seems he can`t move in with this new one as her teenage boys hate him as she threw out their Dad. Another point is that the new lass lives in an infamously rough area and her ex has already sent out threats on bro in law and frankly I can believe them.

It`s going horribly wrong for him as everyone, including me, is rallying around P. His mother is very religious and thinks it is dreadful. She is my wifes only sister and my wife is fretting as you might expect. Sorry this is long but it`s complicated.

Reports today suggest that my bro in law is in a daze, a right state. So much so we are wondering if he is having a break down but we don`t know.

More complications. he has a building firm employing his 2 sons. One lives with his girlfriend and the other lives with P. More tension there. To be honest, they have had the life of Reily for about the last 10 years or more as he has earned stupid money due to the building boom and they have lived very well. that`s all going to crash.

P has asked that I help manage the finance and frankly not sure what to do. they are near London and although they have about £250,000 worth of equity in the place, split that into 2 and P will not be able to buy anything bearing in mind that she needs to house my niece and 18 year old nephew. None of them earn very much and renting would be so expensive. Total mess and so unexpected. They are the only adult family we have so it`s a real worry to us, also we are 200 miles away.

I think he will come back, tail hanging between his legs but P said how could she ever trust him again and rightly so.

Anyway, just needed to vent. Thanks for reading.

That is a whole heap of stuff going on there Graham!

I can imagine it must be very stressful as it sounds complicated. Can I maybe with love and good intentions, point out that it is nice that you are helping and supporting - but its not your responsibility to 'fix' everything for them.

It seems a theme on here that we all take other peoples problems on, and make it our business to sort everything out. Maybe we are asking too much of ourselves?

They are very lucky to have family like you, but at the end of the day theres only so much you can do.

Lots of people on here have had to struggle on jobseekers and housing benefit for a while, and although its hard its not forever. If he does have a breakdown, just making sure he has a good social worker is a good enough start. They will make sure his priorities are secured, such as preventing homelessness and legal action against him while he is ill. Everything else will sort itself out in time.

I do hope you manage to look after yourself during all of this, and recognise your limitations. We all have limitations, its just some of us ignore them to put others first.

Really feel for you, I can tell it is really upsetting you.

Keep us posted,

f x