Just back from first counselling. .all very posative ...lots to think about and sort out in my head....could of talked for hours....role on next week...thanks gamcare ....and to all in here for such support x
Well done girl, thinking positive is a great tool:))
Try not to run before you can walk:))) small gentle steps forwards is the best way forwards, stuff will fall into place on its own and you will be stronger then, sooo pleased to see you kicking B Windsor in the gutter and keeping her there.
Keep going and keep positive.
Suzanne xxx
Thanks Suzanne....and I will do little steps....I've had another run in with babs today...
Bombarding my face book with that bonus I said about....I've never even liked the page...they told me its coincidence. ...random advertising.bla bla. ..yet it has same value as one that came in post ...and says we have missed you....get they have !. ..spoke to face book and they said it's defo babs trying to link my email address ....s**m bags...no royal person for her lol...reported again to gambling commision....there out right shoving it my face is making me more determine to kick it ....long may my strength continue x
And it will loxxie, your determination shines through:))
Just like the adverts on the TV, constantly reminding us 🙁 but soon all this will just go over your head.
Well done, keep going and going and keep winning.
Suzanne xxx
Suzanne...thankyou for taking the time and interest to post....I will get to the top of the hill...can't wait to breath the fresh air...but I won't run before I can walk : )hope all going well for you love...we are winners xx
Day23...no real urges to play...lots to mull over from counselling yesterday....hope today's a good one...defo won't include on line slots...hope your all ok out there in forum world x
Easy day as far as slots go...no urges...and very lttle thoughts about them....several momments of guilt about whole gambling addiction...lies...lack of contact with friends...family..chores etc..but still early days so I suppose that's normal...hope you have all had a good day x
Keep going loxxie, you are doing just fine :)))
Suzanne
Hi loxxie, just caught up your diary and you are doing a great job!
Addiction grips us and grinds us down until we're on the bones of our a**e. It takes strength and determination to overcome the toxic habit and yours shines through. With the support of your daughters, counsellor and here (of course!) you will succeed.
Take care and very best wishes xx
ps: never like that Babs anyway
So glad to see you are still going strong. The ads and the emails get to me too. They either make the anger, guilt and bile rise in my throat or make me think ooh I fancy a shot of that. Neither response is particularly healthy but I think I am getting better at dealing with them. I guess how we react is the important thing in recovery and it sounds like you are reacting just fine. Well done for taking forward your complaint and staying strong. Jx
Still plodding on....chipping away slowly at old bills...no urges to play....and surprised how little I'm thinking about slots...like so many on here...all the advertising on tv...makes me cross...how many more innocent people will it suck in....been a lot of fraud related crimes in news ....all caused by people caught up with online gambling...and all of them are ladies...scary times ahead I think....
Well done on your 24 days... Keep it up!!
Thanks guys....never felt so tired and stewed...maybe it's the weather x
Hi Loxxie, I found the tiredness unbearable at the beginning and, if you look around the early stages of most of our diaries you will see it is a recurring theme with a lot of us. I would stay up half the night when my husband was on night shift and get up and go to work on 3 hours sleep, madness; but that's how it works. Sneaking around, juggling the finances, robbing Peter to pay Paul, lying and, in my case, using money which was for the use of my family (so basically stealing from them) - no wonder we are knackered when it all hits home as we deal with our recovery.
Take care, you'll feel much better soon xx
Thanks Annie...can relate to all you said....I've got a lot to work through....honesty...not been happy in marraige for over 20years...never been an equal partnership....I've always felt like mum....always sorted things...dealt with every thing...some everything..
For more years then I can remeber I've just wanted hubby to say...you ok love...but never had..
Constantly felt like I was being grinded down...so hard to explain it all without sounding lijevim blaming hubby...I'm not ...but I found comfort in the slots....thought I could win enough money to get out of unhappy marraige.New start for me...but as we all know...those wins don't come...I'm not interested at all in gambling at the moment...just want to work out what I want to do....oooh...it was so much easier to stick my head in a slot machine....praying for strength to find the life I want .....sorry for the ramble x
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