OUT WITH THE OLD IN WITH THE NEW

I kind of get what you're saying Taxi driver, my thoughts were never so luxurious, I just wanted to get rich so I could go & gamble every day without the guilt & having to try & recover what I'd spent through loans & credit cards! I even promised myself a 'little treat' if I made it to the month. Problem was when I thought about it, my 'little treat' in essence involved me needing about £1k to chuck away & then access to more money so I could carry on chasing it! With the wisdom of people on this sort of site saying one bet was all it takes to slip back, 30 days behind me, a partner who did not think a 'little treat' was a good idea along with the realisation of how much I was willing to lose, I sailed straight through the marker & have not looked back. It does still scare me that I can never gamble responsibly, I loved it (hard to remember when but I'm sure I must have to have carried on for about 3 decades) & only ever wanted help in controlling it. I know now that this was the addiction leaving the door open! For me recovery means never going back so I don't look ahead, I just take each day as it comes & it really does work!

Keep busy, stay strong - ODAAT

Hi taxi driver,

Thanks for your post, and 4 days today, well done.

Concentrate on one day at a time, keep busy, and think small steps, recovery will be more important in your mind than the nasty thoughts to gamble, as each day builds up, and be kind to yourself you are in recovery, we need 100% comittment to ourselves because the addiction hates us winning.

Stay strong and keep going

Suzanne xx

Day 4

Well it's day 4 today and I still have not give in... I had a few shaky moments last night but I got through them, I went out in my cab at 7pm and for two hours I made next to nothing, so the 'shall I just go in the bookies and try and make it up' started creeping in... But I held firm and then work picked up... It's a very bad trigger I have, where if I'm not making my money and things arnt goin my way I revert to gamble to try and make it up!!!!

This mornin was a really big test for me as the football always sucks me in but again I didn't give in to temptation and I'm still gamble free 4 days on.

I have been out all day in my local watching football, I will now just chill out till I go back out to work tonight..... My GF still has not been in touch but I'm hoping for a phone call tomorrow as she is going to let me know if she is going to come and see me...

Hope everybody is feeling good and is keeping strong!!! Thanks for all the support!!!

Hi mate well done on day 4 and for getting past the full football program today and yea I've been exactly the same in the past with regards trying to make up the money usually left me with nothing to show for the nights work similar feelings if you do better than you thought you think well I'll bet with the extra bit I've made no good has ever come from it.

Hope you have a good night tonight mate

Day 5

Well it is a week ago today that I had gone a full week without betting, then I had one and capitulated for two days gambling all the money I had earned that week...

Had a lazy lie in today been workin hard all weekend so I'm shattered, my mum has done a roast dinner so I'll be trecking down to see the family...

My GF phoned me before it was great to speak to her and know that her and the dog are ok, she did give me some bad news though one of her friends has been told she has 6 months to 2 years to live with cancer that has spread to her bones, it's so sad she is only 27 and a lovely person...

Hope everybody is feeling good and enjoying there weekend

Hey mate day hope you had a good lazy Sunday and enjoyed your Sunday roast.

Glad you spoke to your gf yesterday but sorry to hear that terrible news hope you get yourselves sorted so you can both support each other.

Have a good day pal

Thankyou Dave and NT... Was shattered yesterday!!!!

Day 6

Well here I am still gamble free 6 days on, yesterday was a tough day as gambling was on my mind more than it has been for the last week... I think I maybe onto another trigger which I have never realised till now - TIREDNESS..... I felt impulsive urges and I was knackered, so went home and got in bed for a couple of hours sleep, and when I woke up I felt fine, you learn something new each day....

Today I plan to go and pay a few bills then come back home and chill before work tonight, spoke to my girl yesterday and I plan on seeing her on Wednesday, so I'm looking forward to that...

I hope every body has a nice gamble free day.. Thanks for reading!!

Hi taxi driver

Tiredness was one of my triggers, which I did not realise at the time was due a lot to gambling 24/7, lol.

you may feel tired and drained for a couple of weeks, stopping gambling and then abstaining, can be very tiring and draining.

you recognised the trigger so very well done for not acting on it.

Hope all goes well when you see your girlfriend, it will be 8 days then of being clean,

stay strong and stay positive, one whole week tomorrow. And thst will feel great.

suzanne xx

Thanks Suzanne... I've never realised it until I was thinking to myself what is the difference from the way I feel today to yesterday..... And the only thing I could think of was I was really shattered.... So yes I'm made up I realised this..... Hope you are ok and keeping well....

Carl

Hi Carl well done on your full week gamble free and good stuff recognising that trigger and for not acting on it.

Have a great day mate

Day 7

Just got in from night shift and I'm shattered! Still haven't gambled and I don't think I will any time soon, the thoughts Are still there but the urges haven't been as strong, it's been a week today and I feel a lot better within myself.... Night off tomorrow, looking forward to seeing my gf and spending some quality time with her....

Hope everybody is feeling great and have nice gamble free day.

Hi ya, thanks for dropping by 🙂 Start of a new week for you now, great work getting that 1st one under your belt! I'm not sure the thoughts ever go away because we had it in our lives for so long & have to work on a daily basis to ensure we don't let it back! Very glad to see the urges are getting weaker for you, the stronger you get, the more pathetic they wil seem as it isn't always an almighty effort to choose no! I hope you get some quality sleep & have a lovely evening!

Keep strong - ODAAT

Hi Carl 8 days today well done sounds like your going in the right direction mate hope your new relaxed state will help you have a great nite tonight with your girlfriend.

Enjoy your night off pal sounds like your ready for it we certainly rack up the hours in this game. I've not been doing to bad really for time of year just Friday that was a bit of mare.

Day 8

Well and truly into my second week now and I'm feeling good, no thoughts at all to gamble today, been out and bought myself some new clothes to go out in tonight with the missus, can't remember the last time I done that!!! Defiantly feel this site has gave me a really sharp tool in preventing myself from gambling,

Feel so happy!!

Hope everybody is feeling good and wish them a calm happy gamble free day

Thankyou carl

Day 9

Been and seen my councillor today, the session was full of positivity, she was made up I've been gamble free all week.... Also been out and payed a few bills...

Last night I went out with the missus it went really well and I enjoyed it.....

Really am starting to understand myself and my problem a lot more now, just got to keep fighting on!!!

Hope everybody is feeling good and is enjoying there day!!!!