reborn on the 4th July

Thanks Sandra

Was off work yesterday but again I might as well have been there , I reckon I must have been on my phone a good few hours in total saying that I don't really mind as some progress is been made and hopefully more will today

Jess a bit upset today our family cat who is with ex is really not very well , so when I dropped jess off ex had took her to vet and needs to go back tomorrow For blood tests , hopefully she will be ok but at 14 her best days are behind her , as I was fully expecting the ex says wow those vet bills are so expensive 110 quid so far which knowing her so well basically means will you give me one money towards it , so far I haven't offered to as I left that house over 4 years ago a divorce has gone through she's kept the house I paid all her debt off , I am still on the mortgage in name as she can't afford a mortgage on her own , I get paid on Thursday and was planning on buying some clothes for holidays for myself , last month I paid 70 quid on jess for clothes bearing in mind ex gets all the family allowance and I' pay her 190 a month child maintenance , so a dilemma for me probably not for anyone else but been mr nice guy all the time and she well knows that

It's brought one or two urges on but they will pass , it's a very grey area for me with ex , I have said before if it wasn't for jess I would have very little to do with ex if none at all , but jess is my world and she doesn't understand any of this she's just upset her cat is poorly

Not sure who I am more mad with ex for cleverly putting me in this position or myself for been weak and just saying no , I know if it was the other way round she wouldn't offer but then I wouldn't have asked

Hi castle

Sorry for butting in but being on the other side perhaps I can offer a different view

While being happy that it comes across you would do anything for jess and that may include wanting to help her cat, I do feel that the vets bills are down to your ex. You support your daughter just as you should, you provide her with holidays clothes and above all stability. I do wish my kids dad would put in some effort with theirs.

You said in your post that you are a nice person and find it hard to say " no"

Isn't not saying no what gets a CG in a bad situation in the first place.....

I work part time on minimum wage, have 3 children 2 of which have expensive sport/hobbies and for the children so far I have got only 50 more a month in maintenance from their dad than you pay for jess I'm sure I could afford a vet bill for my cats like that. I hope that puts things into perspective

I think the hardest part for a CG is learning to say NO.

Shel

Evening

I wish jess good luck for her show. Chatty chitty bang bang one of my all time family films 🙂

Not in ponds forge but not too far. My lads train in handsworth. There's a little cafe bit in there where I can drink coffee do my study and watch them fight and train on the screens.

Eldest is sporting a swollen eye tonight- makes a change from a nose bleed I suppose.

Glad to have been any help on the vet side of things.

As for my work dilemma - I've filed a report,backed up by management and can only hope the higher powers see it thro otherwise they would have failed in their duty of care for my patient.

Hmmmm Father's Day you mentioned. Now there's a conversation I had today. Asked the boys if they wanted to go shopping for a Father's Day card. They laughed at me. When I asked what was so funny their reply was honest but shocking. Quote" mum seriously have you read Father's Day cards, it's all about how wonderful dads are, my dad lies and I'm not gonna be like him by buying a card with no truth in it"

I had no where to go with that so I just left it at "ok"

Man, his lies and gambling have really done a job on those kids! Still I can hope one day he sees what he's done and bends over backwards to repair the damage with them. At the moment I think he sees me and the kids as a package. Lies and gambling broke our marriage and our family. I'm no longer part of the equation but he will always have 2 sons it his choice whether he chooses to ever be a dad to them.

Sorry for the rambling

Hope tomorrow brings happiness and another day to your tally

Shelly

Thanks Shel

Staying strong with the ex , what you wrote Shel makes perfect sense esp about CGs finding it hard to say no and that fits in well with me so I thank you for that advice

After last week with all the stress and getting nowhere I have decided to take a step back from it all as its just doing me no good , every store is going through this over 3000 in total some may not have to redundancies and some will , we are in the very early stages and we were on wave 2 out of 8 , today I found out one of the managers on wave 1 has now gone of with stress and they are in my opinion a strong manager with years of experience , so I can't let this get to me anymore

Few urges I think mainly wanting a punt on the World Cup but resisted them in truth really looking forward to it so the excitement of it all should be enough

Hopefully going to the pub on sat night i am dropping jess off at her cousins at 9 and picking her up at 9 next morning , jess is fine with it or I wouldn't have gone and just stayed in and watched it , the atmosphere I am hoping will be electric I just hope we can get something from the game

Probably spend bout 20 quid on a great night out much better than spending that in a flash with nothing to show for it and adding unnecessary stress

All by making the right choice each day

Hi castle,

Hope you have a good night just watching the football and enjoying the atmosphere. The safest bet is no bet at all. Keep your money in your pocket except at the bar and you're guaranteed to return home a winner and wake up the next day ( hungover) but with no deep regrets. Apart from the obligatory " why oh why did I have that last drink" lol

Yes my boys do extreme mixed martial arts, eldest does kick boxing and demo performance martial arts. Youngest does weapons, traditional and performance martial arts. Keeps them very fit and focused.

They go to a fantastic club a lot of good boxers there too.

Great to see that you're going to take a step back from what's going on at work. Why worry yourself over something you can't change.

Shel

Hi castle,

Hope saturday's game will be a release of pressure for you, its important not to let the pressure cooker work environment to grind you down too much. Our management seem intent on constantly chopping, changing and switching our staff to try and find a way to get more out of the same number of people. Reality is that over half of these moves make things worse than better.

Don't listen to Shelly dude...that last drink was well worth it! 😉 I'll be semi-neutral, but hope England do fairly well, just don't tell any of my Welsh mates I said that!

All the best

Ryan

thanks shel. , Ryan

been a good day got loads done at work and stress levels low so well pleased on that front , also pay day today and even more pleased I saved 130 quid last month I also noticed I'm not thinking about how much money I have left and keep checking it all the time the key now simply not to waste any its nice just to be comfortable and have a bit left , I do need to build a bit of savings for a rainy day as now no cards to fall back on which I find is the best thing for me

should be off tomorrow but might have to work a few hours yet waiting on a phone call in a way I'm hoping I don't but its something I need to get done but its out of my hands so not goin to stress over it

world cup started , happy days

If they ring tell them your sick - sick of work :-)))

Glad to see your not gonna let it get you down tho.

Pay day arrrrr yes I heard about those. I wonder if my company will remember to pay me this month being as they forgot last month.

Enjoy the footy for what it is

Shel

thanks Shel

I did get that phone call and had to work for a couple of hours but it was worth it some of those who were at risk are now not and two more are which sounds bad but I'm hoping that I can now get everything sorted and no one will lose their job , yes I will lose one of my best staff to another store but at least they have kept their jobs , I just hope it doesn't all change again but I will deal with it if it does

out of all this in the end there's one word I will always remember and that is process , all I have heard is follow the process stick to the process , yes its fair its just how the process works , all I can say is I hope I don't have to go through the process again

Afternoon

No work this weekend although they've rang and text 4 times this aft already to see if I will. A definite no was each and every reply. This is my weekend.

I'm not that scary promise. I am just learning to not let people walk all over me, having said that if I bought something from your store and it was cr** I'd want to speak to the organ grinder not the monkey hahaha.

I've had sort of success with my car. Just got a call while sat here watching boys train

The service manager said I can have my car back tomorrow but it's not fixed. They need it back next week when the new parts arrived.

Funnily enough it's the part I told him was sticking 6 weeks 4 weeks & 2 weeks ago

I did say it was customery to apologise to a customer especially after he told me I was a female driver!!!!!!!!

All good in shelly-land today tho

Hope alls good for you too

Shel

Howdy doody

Too early for me on my day off and the only chance for a lie in for 3 weeks and I've been awake sine 530

Ah well awake now so wanna say thanks for the link , I've left a link for you to look at that describes my past and present just perfectly x

Have a great weekend

Shel

http://youtu.be/RBOJpIwF47Y

Suppose it helps to leave a link lol

Thanks Shel

Technology !! Can't open the link you will just have to sing it lol

Not a bad day at work went as smooth as could be expected so no complaints there , jess getting dropped off bout 5 then taking her somewhere to eat as a treat not sure where yet , then jess's aunt is kindly picking us both up bout 9 and dropping me at pub to watch match so something to look forward to

Dropped jess off at her moms only for the ex to want to have a word bout the cat , I stood my ground but she didnt ask for any money just what she thinks she should do , it was sad really as the poor cat has lost half her weight in such a short time and looks really poorly at 15 she's not getting any younger , jess was upset with it all and it was hard to take in , but I listened and left , I did text her later saying I wish I could help but I'm in no position to and to be fair to her she was fine

Hopefully a little progress made on my side

Woohoo

Progress. See ya can say no and you proved it. Saying no for a CG recovering is one giant leap for mankind and all that jazz!!!! Most impressed.

Ooo a meal out with jess. A funky new diner opened up at meadowhall. Great atmosphere in the eve failing that can't go wrong with harvester. Plenty of free salad to fill up on and the puddings mmmmmmm

Enjoy

Shel

....g***y queen & that square deal pub on corner up from CP is nice too

Shel

Ps. I will not be singing as I can't carry a tune in a bucket.....and I do like glass in my new windows 🙂

If the email thing don't work you can find me via twit ( same name)