reborn on the 4th July

Just a few more days till my daughter returns not spoke for last 2 nights just sent me a text to let me know she is ok and for me that's fine as long has she is having a great time and happy that's all that matters

On a late then an early with work so will keep me busy just got this week and next week to work then off for 2 weeks with goin to Portugal wed to wed in the middle so it gives a few days either side of goin

Not give the holiday much thought really need to get a few bits sorted which I will do this week , need to start planning money for holiday which is goin to be a bit tight but will get through

No news from solicitors it's just been left that they will write to ex s solicitor and see if august can be the last payment of the mortgage then it will be down to ex to make the decision , to be fair the document wrote up stated she would start paying the mortgage on her own when the decree nisi comes through which it should av easily done that if my solicitors had reacted 8 weeks ago but it will be what it will be not goin to stress I will get through it whatever happens

hi castle2

carl

Hi Castle

I know this week must be really tough for you without your daughter here, but you have a great holiday with her to look forward to and I'm sure you will make the most of it.

Really good to see you back posting regularly and providing that wonderful support for all newcomers. I know I benefited from it greatly when I first came to this site!

Stay strong Castle, you're doing great!

Lmm

Hi Castle,

Hope this week is going ok?

Not long till wee princess is home.....then you got portugal to plan and enjoy.

Hope work is not getting you down too much!

Sue x

Gettin to the end of a tough week but not for the reasons I thought , yes I av missed my daughter but coped quite well with that been kept busy with work so gone quite quick

Money worries is on my mind , gettin to the stage now where it's drying up fast just got paid and av very little left got an holiday comin up which will need spending money so that's goin to be tight , I think the uncertainty around my next pay is worrying me more as . Just can't afford another mortgage payment to ex. , I'm just goin to av to talk to her bout it.if the solicitors say I av to pay it then it will av to be in installments over the next months when I pay child maintenance

B4 I got paid I went overdrawn by 18 quid , tv licence direct debit came out which I thought was the next month so was told I would get a 6quid charge thought fair enough but when I checked yesterday I wasn't charged but they had returned a direct each that should av been said to sky. So need to go to bank today to sort out , the banks will not not do me any favours whatsoever due to my debt management plan which fully understand but other than consolidating 2 loans I had which I couldn't afford the payments on if I wanted to get my flat I av never missed a payment in my life , it was the right one to make but now it at times it doesn't help me at all

However I blame no one else but myself and I got myself into this mess and I will get by myself out of it , I do know that gambling is not the answer

Hi Castle,

Thanks as ever for your post.. it is always appreciated.

Sometimes this journey is so difficult because our past will come back and haunt us at the worst possible times but it's always good to remember how far we have come and how much worse off we would be if we were still in that dark place.

Good idea to talk to your ex and try and come to some arrangement. You can only do what you can do and at least you are trying your best.

Hopefully in a couple of weeks you will be able to take your mind off all the money worries and just relax, have fun with your daughter and create some wonderful memories for both of you.

Keep going Castle, you're doing a great job!

Lmm

Hi Castle,

Thank you for the lovely post on mine.

Aint life a b*tch sometimes hey!

Just when things are sorted....they aint sorted!

If you were now gambling what would your options be......answer......not a lot.

As it stands mate I think you can get yourself out of this.....Talk to the ex...I really hope she does the decent think Castle cos you are a good man.........Not making light of things but......Will put my hat out around Wimbledon common....Lots of tourists who like something grey and cuddly!

Hope you have a wicked weekend with your princess!

Sue xx

Daughters back and had a great time so normality resumed there , had a session of counselling Friday and that went well to be honest she doesn't need to help me that much now but it's good to just go and talk and pour what problems I av which always helps

I know where I am at and know where I need to get to and that's still a good few months off , booked another appointment just goin to go once a month in a way we av been on this journey together and want her to be there when I feel I am sorted and ready to face life with hopefully very few problems

Counselling has been the best thing I cud av done and know a fair few on here attend some with mixed views , I think it's so important to av a good relationship to be able to open up and be honest and not hold back , I guess what u put in is what u get out but there's got to be that connection or it won't work

Last week at work them off for 2 weeks not really had to much time to think bout it , no chance of winding down a full on week with loads to do , finish on Saturday then the reality sinks in of goin to Portugal , everything sorted just euros

Briefly spoke with ex bout mortgage payment but not gone into to much she knows bout solicitor messing up, on that front goin to write to them after everything has gone through and tell them exactly how I feel and how badly they av treated me , certainly opened my eyes up to there world for me it's all bout the money and not the customer and they haven't got a rush in them

Other than all that everything is all fine just off to watch diary of a wimpy kid at the cinema hasten to add with daughter lol

Come on Castle....your'e a big kid at heart!

Would love to be a fly on the wall when you are both in Portugal!

Diary of a wimpy kid.....last film I saw at cinema was stuart little (1st one)

Can't wait to hear all about your...sun...sea...sand...with a dose of Castle humour thrown in!

Sue x

Hi Castle,

Hope you enjoyed your trip to the cinema!

Not long now till your holiday... I can imagine how excited you must be!

Hope to see a post from you before you jet off.

Take care and may your last week at work fly by 🙂

Lmm

Hi Castle,

Thanks for your post last week , good to hear from you abd great to see things are continuing to move forward 🙂

Not long now till the hols and i will have my spies in Portugal looking out for the man holding the stomach in while trying to keep up with the pensioners in the pool but having just the best time with his daughter and well deserved too!

Hope the mortgage gets sorted so you can really motor on.

I'm glad you decided to leave the dating sites , maybe i can safely look now without getting too scared lol lol only joking, not my cup of tea!

But i'm sure when the times right the right one will just fall into your arms 😉

Take Care and Keep Strong

Smiling Lucy xxx

Hi Castle

Thank you so much for your post.. it means a lot. When I started my first diary, you were one of the first people to post me and I can't tell you how much strength I gained from it. I will always be grateful and like you, I will never forget.

Thanks again Castle.. hope you have a brilliant holiday, because you deserve it.

Lmm x

Castle,

As always your strength of character amazes me. You certainly experience challenges beyond anything that I have experienced. Lesser men would not be able to cope with what you have on your plate but still you move forward.

Tomso.

One more day of work tomorrow then off for two weeks , everything in place for the holiday and had a real financial boost as my parents gave me 200 euros which as helped out massively

As mentioned before my relationship with my parents is not where it should be , financially they will help out as much as they can I know I only av to ask and I really truly do appreciate it but there's still issues mainly from childhood which also has affected my sister in her life , they know nothin of my gambling problem and that's the way it will stay , I av thought long and hard bout tellin them but know for sure the response I will get is not what I want or need they are both in their seventies and don't need the stress of what's happened to me , all I can do is move forward and try my best with our relationship

What's important to me is to concentrate on myself and get to where I want to be and am happy where it is at , yes it could be better but still things out of my control so I will deal with what's in front of me now

January is still the look term aim today is still the short term aim and that will be achieved , see what tomorrow brings

Hi Castle,

That was a really lovely post on my diary....thank you so much!

One more day of work........can feel a tune coming on!

That was a really nice boost of 200 euros........You are princess are going to party....lol

Know you will have a great time........looking forward to hearing all when you get back.

Sue x