reborn on the 4th July

Hi Castle,

Thank you for the very kind post on my diary. You helped me out a lot there and your words made me see sense again.

Your daughter loves you, that's what matters. Again I used to do similar things when mine was younger, very brave but for all the right reasons.

Try to forget about the bull with your ex, she will never go away but it will get easier, be patient. That sort of cr** used to tip me over the edge frequently. You are very strong. Keep holding it together. I admire you and I know many others on here do too.

Take care,

A>N.

Hi Castle

It must be difficult for you, for as much as you are against the ex wife, you will be for your daughter. At the same time you should not be held to ransom.

Hope that the house isn't too much of a mess.

Stay strong and gamble free.

Never gain ! 3 girl's for 24 hours was a complete nightmare eventually they got to sleep bout midnight and back up at 7, sj now there tired and grumpy went to the park and u could see the falling out starting to creep in , lunch then a play area and by the end of that it was just tears and more tears,finally dropped them both of and returned to the flat , I tried to tidy goin along so it's not too bad

Spent bout 30 quid in all which is a lot esp how times are at the moment but compare that to 8 months ago and that is peanuts , still very strained with the ex but having to talk which I don't really want to

What is at the forefront of my mind is I av to deal with this it is a life problem and needs dealing with , throwing myself into gambling is not the answer but I do understand why I did it to make the pain go away

But that was then and this is now and am strong enough to deal with this

You're a good man Castle. Whe myself and Maisie's mother split up years ago you leave with practically nothing (couple of binbags in my case) and pay hand over fist for the pleasure. It's enoughto get anyone down, yet once it's all settled it gets better. The only downside is that you never wish to put yourself in a similar situation again. My sympathies with the sleepover, Maisie, my 9 year old daughter had her friend stay over on Friday night. By Saturday night i was ready for the knackers yard. It certainly is hard work and you're right they are grumpy the next day, due to trying to stay up for a midnight feast. Yet as you say, it's what being a good dad is all about. 2013 will definitely be your year.

take care

Steve

Yo,

If Dusty was still about , maybe she could have waved her wand and fast forwarded to 2013 . But alas no , we will just have to live it lol

You are right in what you say , you have gained incredible strength over recent months , and you will get through this . With your head held high and I believe your recovery in tact .

For now just sending you a big fat hug , cause you sounded like you could do with one .

Shiny xxxxxxxxx

Been struggling a bit this week but know why , still tryin to come to terms with having to pay the ex more money it's really eating away at me and need to accept it and move on , that tied in with work had a meeting yesterday and told cut backs are in need so need knock 5 % of the wage bill but still wanting the same standards or else the else been threatened with disciplinary action I know it's not personal it's just how it is now and it's the same for everyone but not good for the team morale ,also got a visit from the hierarchy on Thursday so it's gonna be a long long day tomorrow to make sure it's spot on not that it will be in their eyes will just nod and agree and take it on the chin u just can't say anything there days as it just comes across has been negative even if u try to put in a constructive manner , they will come and go and life will go on

So a little stress goin on but staying strong and focussed , on speaking terms with ex but still strained to say the least , next few days will fly by so loads of positives there and just what I need at the moment

Yo,

Good morning , your probs at work , so you will not get this till laters .

Hope you are ok , that your long day went past quickly and without too much stress .

Every day is getting closer to 2013 , keep hold of that thought . Cause if I remember rightly , that is your year , the year when the hard work you put in this year , the problems you have had start to ease.

Not that I am wishing your life away , but there a light at the end of tunnel even if sometimes it feels as if someone turned the dimmer to low setting .lol

Shiny xxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Castle,

I hope u r ok 🙂

I hope things start 2 get better 4 u, 1 thing that makes me smile is no matter what stresses u r faced with.... U still remain gamble free and that takes soooo much strength and determination! U r doing brilliant 🙂

I laughed about how ur daughters sleepover went and when u wrote about not looking 4ward 2 her teenage yrs. One thing that is clear is how much ur daughter means 2 u, she is lucky 2 have a Dad like u Castle 🙂

U deserve nothing but happiness 🙂

Have a gr8 day x

Hi Castle, Talking about great guys, have you looked in the mirror lately?

Thank you for the very uplifting post on my diary. You have raised my spirits even higher.

Glad you are doing so well. It won't be long and things well become clearer and less of a worry. Despite all of it you just keep sailing on with flying colours anyway.

Best wishes as always, A>N.

Hi Castle

I would agree with AN here...I read so many of your supportive posts on other people's diaries....it's people like you that makes me want to succeed!

Really glad your doing well yourself castle...keep strong and positive

Jewels

Hey Sir,

Just wanted to echo what our good Shiny friend said but with a slightly different spin. I myself have such high hopes for next year and I almost want to count the days away too quickly.

However, I have been making a very conscious effort lately to see what I can salvage from this year. Sometimes it's not easy especially in the midst of a tough week or tough month but mayb write a list. What has gone well this year? What can still be achieved this year?

2013 will be your year, it will be my year but lets not give up on 2012 yet. I have 157 days gamble free and you my friend have a fair few more than that. I have started that list for you.

Take Care my Friend,

Flagg

Hi Castle

Hope the stresses at work are not too bad and that the big wigs only saw the good !

Thanks for your post even though a little cheeky !

As a woman though we have many advantages for covering up the not so good , you men just have to lump it ! Ohhhh didn't mean you were a lump !!!!!!!!

Hope the stresses pass soon Castle and you get back to top form !

Keep strong

Lucy

Castle,

Hey buddy not spoke in a while. I hope all is well. I hope all went as well as could be expected at work today. Sorry to hear that you still have financial issues with your ex and hope that gets sorted ASAP so that you can move on and start preparing for the happy future you deserve (not saying you don't have a happy life now). I was reading your diary recently without replying and was glad to see that you and your daughter had a fabulous holiday. I missed out on going away this year and plan to have next year booked up by the end of the month. Time away is the best and should be compulsory in my book. I might write to Mr. Cameron to issue a new law that states everyone must get away for at least a week. I'm sure he will push that one through quickly.

Wishing you well.

Tomso.

Hey mate,

Great to see you looking out for the new ones. They are in despair, no jokes there. It pains me too.

Take care,

A.N

Had a decent visit with work picked up on bits bit then they were always goin to but been and gone now prob be xmas b4 the next one

Been thinkin a lot bout this site recently and for me it's been a life saver on many occasions , this is my support a few close people know of my addiction but don't understand as I suppose it's not impacted on their lives at all , so I heavily rely on here reading posts esp new ones I need that reminder of where I was 8 months ago I need to see what people are goin through to remind me never to go back

Not mentioned my relationship with my friend at work for a while , we still see each other and still av strong feelings but the difference is she knows what I want in life and determined to make a fresh start in 2013 , I will do this with or without her to be fair she's started to get some things in order but that's her choice her life I really don't worry any more I know what I want and nothin will divert from that , the vicious circle that used to be is no more , I think I was more concerned what she was doin instead of been more concerned for myself but now the focus is just on me and rightly so

Having a nice peaceful day today off work , washed cleaned ironed tidied everywhere and now just chilling in a spotless clean flat just the way I like it a far long day from blowing all my money in the bookies from when they opened !