Regrets, I've had a few, but then again....

Hi Ryan

Lets hope 2014 can turn those dream into realities with travelling round the world, b4 have a great xmas, thanks for all your support throughout the year

Castle2

Hi Ryan,

Lovely post full of positivity. I am sure your plan to go round the World will come round soon enough 🙂

You doing great and should be proud!!

Have a lovely time this Xmas and New Year..you sure deserve it 🙂

Sandra x

Well, we're into day 97 and still not having any real feelings of wanting to gamble, but as usual I'm keeping my defences up and not letting temptation weasel its way back into my mind.

Christmas is out of the way and I'm back at my desk doing some freelance writing (slowly and ponderously at the moment), and looking forward to the weekend after my shift this afternoon.

I'm not sure about other people, but I find it hard to post if I'm feeling down or unhappy, which might be why when I do post they are quite optimistic and positive. There are periods of being down or in a dark mood, I just tend to lurk around and take strength from other people's successes when I don't feel positive enough to post myself. Defeating gambling isn't just happiness and light, and I wouldn't want to pain the picture that it is.

However, I still want to take the positives with me into today and the weekend, and every article I write and get paid for is one more step towards getting my feet on foreign soil!

All the best

Ryan

Hi, Leedso..

I understand the pain of gambling and then the urges of wanting to gamble...

Winning means nothing to compulsive gamblers it's the losing that always get us...Okay, let me get this point straight..If you haven't been gambling that surely is a win, because you cannot actually lose....However, if you are recovering CG it means; at times you feel like you need to win because it feels like nothing, that you have up until now beaten the addiction....It really is a difficult behavioral problem isn't it?...

I am day 1 after a huge loss today and cannot even comprehend what I have done...Thanks for your time.

Hi Ryan,

Thank you so much for the post. Really made me smile 🙂

I am still learning to accept good and bad days, but it is progress...slow but sure. Thank you again and well done for keeping strong in your peronal battle!!!

Sandra x

Thanks for the post...I did ramble a bit..

I started to post a bit back but no one replied...

I have to address my problem again...I believe facing my demons will be for the best...I could have gone away to far east, but surely I will just return one day?...

So....... This is it!!

Good wishes to us both...

Ryan

my friend you are without doubt reaping the rewards of your efforts to arrest and continue to abstain and maintain.

For it I salute you.

Duncs stepping forward never back

Today will be 100 days since I last gambled, and frankly I'm in a much better place. While the manic highs of gambling is no longer in my life, neither are the crushing lows, and that is certainly a good thing.

Balance is key to continuing in the right direction, and today I won't be doing much apart from going to work as normal. It's a quiet milestone, and hopefully one that will remain behind me for a long time to come.

Thanks for the support guys, it's all a helping hand in the right direction.

Ryan

Hey Ryan,

Very well done for reaching 100 days mark, may long it continue!!!! A little congrats vid for you :-)))

http://youtu.be/M07gTpFj8-Q

While I'm here I wish you Happy New year and all the best for the future 🙂

Sandra x

103 days in, and happy new year everyone.

Not much to say today, feeling a little ill, cough, cold, pulled a muscle in my back from coughing. Generally, hope everyone's having a better time than me. One hour to regain my humanity before its time to head back to work again!

All the best

Ryan

Hey Ryan,

Thank you for the post ... maybe not the nicest one for u to see on my tread.., but been struggling with my emotions recently..diary got the hit as u see :-))

Anyway, ur post raised a smile...thank you 🙂

Doing well my friend and reaping the medals abstinence gives u 106 days today? If that'right..really huge well done !!

I hope you feeling better with urself and cold let u out of it's grip...horrible time of the year, but day by day, coming closer for more light, sun, longer days, warmth... :-))

Love love summer as you might see

Take care and keep up the good fight!!

Sandra xx

I often find it much easier to post when I'm in a good mood, but as we all know life ain't full of good moods and happy times. Maybe its just being at the start of another working week, but feeling a little bit down and could do with dragging myself into a chirpier state of mind.

While gambling may have been a major part of my problems, it probably started as a symptom of something else. Working in a monotonous job because it pays more than other jobs available, its easy to let my head drop. In reality I probably have it fairly easy, I'm not in a stressful job like some of you guys (sandra, SA). Nonetheless, sometimes its just trying to get my brain in gear and thinking positive. One of these days I'll figure out how to live sustainably and positively without debt, gambling and all the other gubbins that has blighted the last decade.

Ah well, on the plus side I'm 108 days without gambling, and the urge to throw away cash on a computer simulation of gambling isn't big in my mind right now. Equally, it might just be being quite hungry that's getting me down, trying to lose weight (six pounds since NY!), but it takes discipline and willpower not to hit the crisps!

All the best

Ryan

Hi Ryan and great stuff on your 108 days!

Following on from your thoughts, work is tricky isn't it. On the one hand you wouldn't want to be stressed out in a low paid challenging job like I am but then I'd imagine that monotony and boredom in work can also potentially be equally soul destroying... and yet we stick with it and the regular income because to do something about it takes motivation, effort and planning. For me anyway I find it hard to break out of established routines (job etc), even when they make me unhappy. A work in progress.

I hope your mood lifts and stay away from them crisps! 😉 regards.. S.A 🙂

P.s maybe we should do a job swap! 😉

Hi Ryan,

What are u doing on page 3 lol..couldn't find it 😛

Yeah, join me on Europe trip..would be fun i believe..( just pls avoid Poland) no offence...but roads there are killing lol

You doing great

Keep up good work

Get it all out of ur system..it helps a lot 🙂

Take care

Sandra xx

Evening all,

Feels like a while since I last posted, but I guess it hasn't been that long. The downer I was on a few days ago has gone, and some good news tonight in terms of my mother's health. She has been waiting to see a specialist for a few months about a benign tumor, and now he's seen her he's going to do a small operation to burn it out in the next month. After worrying that it was going to be full open surgery, he's now going to do a small keyhole type thing which is quite specialised but has higher success rates than regular operations.

It's such a weight off her mind, and obviously that of the rest of the family too. I can't say yesterday was great, but that news really cheered me up. Idle moments at work spent thinking and planning my big trip, optimism is back in my makeup again. I know I've added a few more days to my total, but I don't even feel the need to add it up tonight.

All the best everyone, I hope 2014 is still feeling better than 2013 for all of us.

Ryan