Sick of Being Sick

three posts back to back from me, dont think im stalking ya or anything lol. Just doing the rounds and thought say hi and all the best. Hope youve had a good week and look forward to seeing that check in tomorrow.

I know ya don't post on here all that much but I'm doing the rounds and couldn't leave ya out. Just wanted to drop in as say hope your well. Look forward to seeing you at the check in later. Your doing great mate, I think we're about 7 weeks in now, crazy how quick it's gone. Have a great weekend.

Still here motoring away all good heading to a meeting tonight.

Michael

Well done Michael, keep it up...it is a lot nicer on the other side of the road:)

You can do it, and you don't need this destructive desease

Keep it up!

All the best

Sandra x

I went to a meeting they were doing step 8 anyway thought occurred to me. Please take all my comments with a pinch of salt the reason I fail to recover is that I am arrogant I feel smarter than most actually superior. I think I can outthink my addiction and thus manage my gambling. I think brain power can defeat one of my most basic urges. I don't think my gambling picks are much better or worse than most. It's my reaction to loss that is different the fact is all logic goes out the window filled with an intense need to be right/win compounded by frustration when your spiralling into a complete meltdown which funny enough on one level you are completely aware of but unable to stop. This is me is it you?

another meeting tonight they are great I don't always give it the respect it deserves but for me its brilliant. Anyway more thinking most of my losses come from just complete madness. i.e I go in thinking one thing and before long a 5 euro bet turns into a 4 figure loss all because I need to be right. I just blow so much with so little thought I just zombie out.

Michael, try not to think of the losses. When I start thinking about mine, it's a huge trigger for me. Instead, try to shift your focus. Read lots of diaries and post here every day if at all possible. Work on trying to change how you think. I know what you mean about zombing out. That's what happens to many of us when we gamble. We lose our rational selves and it just takes us over. Don't think of losses and don't think too far ahead. Just do your best in the moment. Try to live in the moment. Best to you!

Cannot sleep delighted to see Wilsy get to over 180 days and heading for 200 if he can do this we all can. He had it so tough at the beginning but he hung in. Just posting as I can't sleep so warm letting you know I am still alive.

Michael

Your post on monday I can totally relate to. You could be describing me. I feel I should be smart enough to control my gambling, I should be able to pick winners and beat the bookies, I feel there must be a way. I can't control it all evidence says I can't beat it and yet I still try. And your right it's the reaction to the loses that separate us from the "normal" gamblers. Most people think they will lose and so are ok with it when they do but every bet I put on I believe in 100% so I'm shocked and hurt when I lose and also I'll put so much more on than I should because why have £5 on a "cert" when you could have £100 or more on. Why after so many losers do I not realise I'm not gonna be able to win any money I'm gonna lose and spiral out of control again and again. And that's something I also agree with we feel it, see it coming but somehow can't stop it even tho we know its wrong when in that zone it's so hard to stop.

But we know now after taking a step away that what we were doing is so destructive in so many different ways and the important thing now is to never to get in that position again. Your doing so well and the gambling world can offer us nothing. Stopping gambling gives us hope for the future. I am now for the first time in a long time looking forward to mine. Hope you have had a great gamble free weekend. Keep strong Michael.

Hello Michael just popping in. Hope all is well be strong.

Hi

To all I have returned gambling on Monday, Tuesday I won but I no intention of staying at it. I lost my way a little I was not posting here I was reading a lot and attending GA. I have every intention of returning to this it was working I messed up. I have made mistakes but I don't intend to keep making them.

Michael

Hiya Michael sorry to hear of your slip and I'm sorry to be replying so late to it. It can only go downhill if you continue to gamble. You know that and that's why you intend to stop. It's a hard journey and you need to give your all to stopping if your going to be able to stay stopped. I hope to hear from you soon and I would try to stick to these pages as much as possible as a reminder of why your quitting and to add that strength to your recovery. Put any additional blocks in place that you feel could help you along the way. Stay strong and don't forget this is hard and yes be disappointed with slipping as you don't want to again but be proud that your still fighting and ultimately moving forward.

Downhill it went financially anyway I am here to start again. so well teday is not day 1 but tomorrow will be.

Well done Michael being back here is the best decision you'll make. Keep at it. It'll all click sooner or later and being gamble free feels so much better than gambling. Even if your situation is bad it'll only feel worse in the grips of gambling. Keep strong mate. Keep going.

To be honest not gambling sits better with me. Even when I am gambling I know I am wrong and I suppose I just ignore it nothing like the feeling you are not going to do your brains or win a million tomorrow. Nothing weird is going to happen tomorrow I am not going to win a fortune nor am I going to lose a fortune Simple as tomorrow I hope will be non eventful.

Michael