Starting again.

urges will come and go easylife,stick around on here,it works for you getting your thoughts down.

this site is here to help you mate,and it will.

best wishes,

you can do it 🙂

Thanks wp...

I really do think about gambling...quite simply because of the debt and the problems with my bank not being able to help? Also, at work they are not giving me the hours....

Winning is LOSING! losing is winning...Its a tight turnaround....But im begining to understand things......

I finally am starting to realise, I am going to rebuild my confidence....

Hi Easy Life,

Winning is Losing aboulutely right, keep going , you have given me the strenght hope I can help you too..

Ha! Ha! Loved your comment on the other thread about you setting up that "any time in January" diary. Let's hope that it does not go as far as a diary entitled "Gamble-free between 7.14pm and 7.36pm on 27th January 2012".

"Winning is losing".

To non-CGs, the above statement means absolutely nothing. To us CG's it means a hell of a lot, it is so true. We simply cannot afford to win any more.

There is only one way for us to "win" and that is NOT to gamble.

GT

Hey Li£e,

Urges are natural at this stage in our recovery, essentially we have been living in a fantasy world and our compulsive thinking brains are trying to get us back there both consciously and unconsciously. What’s important is that you are recognising this and putting your thoughts down and asking for support, if we continue with abstinence urges will gradually become less of a problem.

Any plans about finding a new job? I know employments not easy to come by but your job is not even providing the hours you need to live never mind the satisfaction that you need. I work in a warehouse and although it’s not the most glamorous job (!) I always get the 40 hours a week I need to survive.

The next few weeks are going to be tough for the both of us but try to remember its not the urges that are the problem its acting on them, hopefully in a few weeks we will be commenting on each others diary how our lives are slowly improving.

Don’t worry about posting on my diary in fact I actively encourage it each post I receive and write hammers home the devastation and complete MADNESS that gambling brings.

Have a good weekend.

Hi..

Thank you First Aid...

Funny you should mention job.....I quit it today...Money no good, people rude and hours bleak....They just ring me when they feel like it and cancel days on or off?? I cant live like that no more...

Yesterday I actually went into bookies because i noticed an old acquaintance inside there...And hey presto he was on the very machine I lost on....and the money I lost was in the bank... Anyway, good luck to him and whoever...Because I am not upset or unhappy....I just feel blank, the game is to stay away....

Well, yet again a twist in the life of me...I booked a flight today to go around the world (yet again)...It is kind of a break that I need....However, I am back to sqaure 1...A jobless idiot haha...It felt great today when I handed in my uniform........More bad news, I was turned down for my graduate teacher training at Brunel (the excuse was there was no course this year?, liars)....I just think going to university actually made a joke out of me...It certainly opened my eyes...I am not entirely sure if eye openers are good for you?... Anyway, 2 week break in a country where gambling is completely banned is just what the doctor ordered...Im ready to go...I will relax and think about those kfc employees trying to smile at rude customers...and poor me if i was still there cleaning bins and toilets after getting a 1;1 in Sports Health & Exercise Science....I aint racist....But I feel completely let down by the system....I am supposed to be educated and I had 18 year olds who couldnt speak a word of English trying to train me...WHAT A DISGRACE......I aint in pain...Im reeling with laughter.....because no wonder why some people prefer being better off on the dole...haha...

Hiya Easy,

Yes just what the doctor ordered...I think getting away for a short time will do you good, a blast of sunshine will give you a wee lift 🙂 And I'm not being flippant when I say that.

I'm so sorry to hear about the teaching course...:-( ...Just a thought...would there be any opportunities abroad? I'm saying this as a friend of mine did voluntary work abroad with the qualifications he had, he taught in a college in a developing country but came from an engineering background not teaching. Thinking in terms of a gap year? Good for the CV for future applications?

Take care and keep Strong

Love Del x

Wow, what a change of scenery this will be for you, I am jealous!

What you must do is to make sure that you fully enjoy those two weeks and use them to totally relax and recharge your batteries.

Time for you to reflect too, perhaps?

GT

Thanks guys...

I hope everything works out for all of us!!

Easy li£e

check out TEFL... short courses Teaching English as a Foreign Language...can do them over a couple of weeks and a handy passport to have if you want to work abroad.

All the best in whatever you choose to do EL..

Hi thanks Dotty..

I had a gambling dream last night?!! Not good...So, it is still trying to worm its way back in...I know it take some time for urges to go...But in the living world I can quite effectively stop the urges...I have no control over dreams....HAHAHA...Believe me thats where your gambling urges come from...DREAMS...It makes sense because we all know it isnt real...But something makes us do it...

Easy li£e

Hello Easy, always been a follower especially when in need of a smile but on the whole steer clear. Am quite an abyss thinker but always worried going to deep!

Was surprised to see you slip pal and even the different tone of your diary! Things are so easy when on the up but as you know the real test comes when life rears the ugly side? Possibly of the beaten path here but going to share some lyrics to my next platinum song -- Your a d*k, he's a d*k, every f****r's a d*k! great little ditty to go with it! 1 thing this teaches me when i sing/whistle this is the only d*k is me!

Anyway good on you for your trip, are you looking or escaping? Travelled and worked overseas fair bit, last being the trans siberian . Loads of work to find in the likes of china or Laos, TEFL always helps but plenty teaching jobs with out it just a bit of savvy required, but a whole range from working with panda's, street kids, land mine victims and the list goes on....ps gambling banned in them 2countries but still in your face every day hence no escape from th gambling S***e..

exMug

Hi mate,

I remember you were one of the first diaries I posted on when I came here a few years back, and I'm so sorry for the recent problems you've had. I've fallen down too, but I know you're tough enough to pick yourself up and get going again.

Travel is very important, it's what I've used as my motivation to keep me gamble free and to keep me working hard. Keep plugging at it, and I'm sure you'll get to the other side.

All the best

Ryan