Aww, so lovely to hear you had a healthy little soldier...Congratulations to you & Mummy 🙂
Listen, don’t under estimate the stresses of parenting & keep fighting that devil, he is after all only as strong as you let him be!
Well done for resisting. I am tempted today, even after losing £4000 in a week and potentially really s******g up my life. How stupid are we????? As soon as i get it in my head my chimp takes over and it is almost inevitable that i will waste more of my hard earned money. I am trying to put as many barriers in place, one of which is to self exclude from every gambling webiste out there. This has taken years of opening and self exluding after spending £1000,s in each one. Not a route i would recommend. Giving my cards and money to my son to protect it and will try to keep busy. I have been gambling for 25 years plus, so am i in a good position to give advice not to touch it with a barge pole if you can;t control it.
Keep up the good work, one day at a time. Choose life!!!!!
Thanks Kelly & Bumblebee. 2 weeks gamble free now but really struggling to come to terms with recent relapse. Fog starting to lift but really stressed and anxious at the moment. My path back to gamble free ways coincides with the most stressful period of work I have had in many years. It's good but I'm working all hours, sleep deprived and my head is all over the place. I'm taking it out on person I love the most, maybe it's the guilt I dont know but when you stop gambling the reality sinks in. I can't believe the double life I've been living for so many years. I need to find a way of managing my stress and anxiety better. For years any downtime has been filled with gambling binges which do the opposite - only pile on more anxiety and stress. If anyone has any ideas fire away? Issue is I have struggled to find something to fill the void that gambling did. Exercise, reading, watching movies I struggle with as I can't relax. But thinking back I was like this the last time and in time I did come to enjoy simple things again. Instead of working tonight I'm going to spend a few years reading on here - something I've not done much of recently. Tomorrow is a new day as the saying goes, for now I need to just not gamble.
Happy to say I haven't gambled since my last post over a week ago. I'm starting to sleep better again as my workload has eased a bit. Spent the weekend in Amsterdam with work colleagues but wasn't quite my usual self which was probably a good thing in a city of various vice's! Starting to realise I need to look after myself better - in body and in mind. To learn to be at ease with oneself isn't the easiest thing for me - I like to keep busy to avoid confronting certain things.
Anyway I'm in better spirits and in more control of my workload and routine from the past few crazy weeks.
Onwards and upwards.
Pretty much a month gamble free now and feeling so much better for it again. Coming to terms with finances, realising again that if I dont gamble then I will sort things out eventually over next few years but if I gamble most likely I'll repeat the same pattern I have been doing the past 3-4 years and never get rid of my 'gambling debt'.
Had a really good week, got lots done and looking forward to spending a few days away with family at a hotel. Need to relax. Going to try and switch off a bit more so taking a book with me I've wanted to read for ages and not going to look at my phones so much - might even chuck in the safe most of the time so I can't look at work stuff etc.
Will also be able to go swimming, walking etc with my little boy so cant wait!!
Onwards and upwards!
Slipped again, been gambling a bit the past few weeks. Fortunately no losses encountered actually up a little but I staked far too much again and risked further big chunk of debt. Know the money is irrelevant, I need to stop. I'm starting again, blocks in place really need chatrooms to open again and get back into habit of getting on here daily. I want to get back to place I was when went 18months g/f (not so straight forward) where I mentally told myself I cannot ever gamble again dispite the fact I really want to.
Small steps for today getting back to one day at a time. Really need to let go. Think it's time to reach out to gamcare again for some help. It worked well last time I REALLY took recovery seriously.
Yesterday was a gamble free day, committed to making today the same.
Counter adjusted so starting from March 1st.
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