Not posted on here for a long time.. Cut a long story short, been gambling on and off since 18. Like most people on here, i am never happy with stopping or winning, so i don't. I always keep going and end up losing... and more. I did stop gambling for 2 1/2 years what seems like a long time ago.
Over the last year i have had 3 lots of 1-2 week gambling cycles and whilst i haven't gone to previous extremes and lost thousands, i have lost considerable amounts of money. I recently (Feb) went to see a councellor for 5 sessions who said i was too hard on myself when i relapse but i don't want to keep going through this cycle of financially hurting myself every 3-4 months. This includes the way gambling makes me feel.
I am currently in the position of buying a house with my partner. I am very scared about her finding out about my gambling habits. This could be very embarassing/awkward if the bank question this in front of her. Luckily i have not touched my savings and will not do so. Although i have gambled up some credit card debt which i will clear in 3-4 months time. Has anyone else had any mortgage issues during application to do with gambling. I currently have a MIP but the final checks will be done in the next month or so... good timing after a mini gambling binge 🙁
I am starting this diary to help me remember how c**P gambling has made me feel and a good way for me to be reminded not to wonder back to online gambling or casino!
Day 1
Not going to turn this into a countdown diary as i have in the past. I will along the way look into particular milestones but not countdown each and every time i login to this focus on the days.
I am however logging in today with a much more positive outset. Im fed up of feeding this addiction and i am trying to look at this with this mindset. Over the last 5 years i have gambled for less than 60 days, thats 60/18620. Thats still 60 days too many but i need to focus on the positives to get me through the next 3 months then work on a long term plan to get me through the following 9 months and so on.
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