taking my life back

was thinking yesterday...i have done an awful lot of work on my *insides* these past few months...but have been ignoring things on the outside, still.

in the same way that I would not look at bank statements or credit card bills..just would pitch them in the trash can...I haven't wanted to take care of lots of other things too...a few things need to be done around the house..I need to call repair men...haven't...i've got some filing to do..paperwork is stacking up...haven't...i haven't worked very often (not much more than i did when i was gambling)...

so...THAT is what is on the table now...I have decided to make a list of what I've got to do..prioritize...tackle one per day..of course..if its a good day, and if I feel like it, I may do more...but one per day, for sure.

It's been so long since I was just doing REGULAR things..hard to get back into the swing of things...of NORMAL.

xoxo

hey peg,

That sounds like an idea that will work, i think i should try something like that too,

hope you continue to stay possitive and have good days

Ben 🙂

Hi Peg

Just read your latest post and was quite amazed because I have been doing the same thing!

realised how much I have not done for a very long time. So yesterday I cleaned my windows for the first time in two years ugh! Never knew there could be so many buckets of black water!

But they are done now, my bank statements usually go under the matress, where the old folk hide their money lol

I hope you do well in your list of priorities am sure you will 🙂

Kindest regards

Nora

I did a much better job focusing at work yesterday...taking care of the 'outside' stuff 🙂

It is nearly 48 hours since I've had a cigarette.

I attended my g.a. meeting last night and even walked outside with the smokers at the break...if not for the book, I would've cheated 🙂 I think what's really helping me so much is that the book is helping me to think about it as an addiction...I can relate so many of my gambling lessons/ideas to my smoking as well...i.e. is so so hard to break out of the 'cycle' and that one cigarette isn't a problem...no big deal to smoke that one...but it would've made it SOOOO much easier to smoke the next one...so, no...ENOUGH!!

the outsides...

have been thinking about my body also. I turned 43 a few weeks ago 🙁

When I was gambling I really didn't do very much to take care of me...to have a manicure or pedicure was TORTURE!! to SIT THERE so long (I wanted to go gamble!!) so I rarely did that...neglected so many things...in 2002, when i stopped gambling, I began a daily ritual...long, hot baths with salts or bubbles...relaxing..taking care of me.

i usually skip breakfast or just have a pot of coffee...this morning, a bowl of fruit...and found a yoga/mediatation program that airs every morning on tv...watched it yesterday 🙂 did it today...I feel hmmm I feel great and terrible lol...I was a dancer the first half of my life...and today..I really only did some stretching and wow...the fact that I haven't done anything in a while...i can feel it.

anyway...

the point of all of this...

i am thinking... i am making all of this effort...i am loving life again...grateful for this day...i am feeling good about who i am becoming (inside)...want to feel that way about the outside too...no, i will never be 21 again (nor do i wish to be) but I may as well be the best 43 yr old that I can be!

love to you all!

last gambled 10 30 06

last smoked 4 18 07

xoxoxo

Good on you peg dont think i can face up to giving up smoking at the moment one thing at a time but it is on my list of things to do.

"i am thinking... i am making all of this effort...i am loving life again...grateful for this day...i am feeling good about who i am becoming (inside)"

This is exactly my goal and where i aim to be and i am determined to get there.

Keep up the good work you can do it girl.

Craig

What a lovely uplifting post Peg. Admire you packing in the ciggies, takes a lot of willpower and you have loads of it by the sound of it.

Great to hear you are enjoying life. The weather here is brilliant again today so have been out in the garden, putting together garden furniture and just been sitting enjoying the efforts with a glass of wine. You are so right to say grateful for this day. Joy x

Hi peg

great to hear you have quit the ciggies. Its been three weeks without one for me now!!!

Stay focused and you will get there.

take care

Jim (last bet 22/04/06)

Is amazing to me...the similarities between stopping smoking and stopping gambling...the urges...how my mind tells me how much I 'enjoyed' it...

when i was a teenager, I had a friend who had never tried to smoke..she said...why would I want to do that? maybe...if it tasted like applie pie? or like chocolate? THEN I might want to smoke...but to taste SMOKE???? ugh!!!

wish i had her good sense 🙁

anyway...is helping me to think of smoking in the same light as my gambling...

smoking never did anything for me...the only reason that I have the *illusion* that I enjoyed smoking is because a cigarette eased the withdrawals (that began when I extinguished the last cigarette)...

but..more importantly...I AM NOT DEPRIVING MYSELF OF ANYTHING...I AM FREEING MYSELF!!!

i can do this 🙂

nicely done peg

guess u have just read alan carr's book!!

its good when you can get on top of things enough to look for your next challenge, and really making progress

hang in there

love

carol

xx

i have carol-ann, and the book has made all of the difference for me.

timing is everything, though....synchronicity....I don't know if the book would've been beneficial to me at all (maybe?) if it were not for the fact that I am already in recovery and so much of what the book says are things that I already know and have applied to my gambling addiction.

i keep telling myself...if i can stop gambling...i can do *anything*!!!!

i've been cleaning out some old books today (more 'outside' work that needs doing) and have been thinking...about this site...about some of the names that people here have selected for themselves and how, they can be (or have been) relevant to all of us...

TTNY

everhopeful

starting over

imustbeinsane

lostsoul

unhappy

I love that there is HOPE here 🙂

Hello Peg

What I like about your posts, is that I can almost feel your enthusiasm! keep it up.

Best wishes

Rosemary ( mother of a gambler)

Hi Peg, like rosemary says, we can all feel your enthusiasm. I really dont know why I started smoking. I was 28yrs old and just divorced so I can only put it down to stress and loneliness.

I do remember trying a cigarette when I was 16 and hated it. During my 1st marriage I would tell my husband how much I loathed the smell and wldnt let him smoke in the lounge but he wouldnt stop smoking. It shows how selfish we can become when it is something we want to do, as my daughter now tells me she hates the smell and worries about my health.

I think I will have to get this book and see if it will work for me. It could only do me good, so worth a try?

Good luck with both recoveries in your life. Joy x

Hi Peg,

Just to say hi, and all the best with the non-smoking.

I,m an irregular forum visitor these days. Just popped by your diary to wave hello.

Until next time.

From Chris.

Hi Peg, just want to thank you for your kind words on my diary.

Considering you are quitting two biggies together, I think you are doing marvellous!! so good on you. joy x

Hi Peg,

see you have been on others posts..but nothing here? Are you ok?

Tried the last few days to catch you in safe harbor..but no peg:(

Not to worry..expect you were sleeping! Talk soon x

Jackie