TiMe FoR cHaNgE

hi AJ,

a good positive post there,something to build on.

just a thought i,m picking up on how you got a great deal from talking to someone face to face,well how would you feel if you could do that regularly with say between 6-12 people.

how? you may ask,well i,ll tell you GA MEETINGS.i was feeling exactly the same as you 6 months ago until i took what many call a courageous decision to find GA and go to a meeting.it was and still is the best decision i have ever made.

the guys at GA are exactly the same as me and you,they feel the pain,they have been where you are and where i was.with them telling me how they have dealt with this addiction it has shown me that it can be beaten or arrested and many of them have become good friends too.i think it must be worth a try AJ you see we dont need to carry on beating ourselves up we can do something about it,formulate a plan,take it one day at a time and help others to do the same.

i have no doubt in my mind that the samaritans do a fantastic job but i think they will refer you to GA at some stage so take a chance do it yourself, come in from the cold AJ,be amongst friends and learn to live a good life again.

you are in my thoughts,

"" A NEW LIFE ""

Hello AJ

I am so pleased to hear you went into that building. Now you know there are people out there to help you letting you talk without judging you. keep going.

Best wishes

Rosemary

AJ,

Kim xx

04/08/06

I just got home from work and read the mail.....the b******s of a gambling company sent me a 'NEW! ******** magazine!' essentailly a magazine about their services and upcoming poker tournaments. I self excluded myself from this site 4 weeks ago, you would think theyd get the hint. And i stupidly read through the mag, on a friday, and its made my nerves twitch and urges reappear. I have £200 on a credit card.....it getting hard not to gamble it.

Why are they doing this to me? even worse with the talk about the US restricting gambling, they have set up a website where you can signup and protest....??? and theyre sending me this?.....

weekend is going to be tough....

AJ

AJ - sit up and pay attention here

they are not doing it to you - you are doing it to you!!

you are right, it wasnt the most sensible thing you did reading the mag, and now your nerves are jangling and you know why.

u mean u have £200 on your card before you max it out???? How clever is that??????????

AJ - do what the rest of us do, and bin the junk mail without reading it.

okkies, the weekend

this week end can be as easy or as difficult as you want it to be

okkies, let me repeat

this weekend can be as easy or as difficult as you want it to be.

when all is said and done, its in your hands. You are in your driving seat, and you make the choices.

so, are we going to have a fantastic weekend doing things that have nothing what so ever to do with gambling?

or

am i going to be picking up your pieces on sunday evening???

right, i know what my choices will be over the weekend, AJ, i really hope and pray that we will be making the same choices

hang in and please stay safe

Today is a good day, and i am living every moment to my full potential

Youre right carol....im doing this to myself.....time to take control..

im going to go for a jog, watch an Austion Powers movie, always make me laugh, and then bed.....no messing about tonight

Tomorrow - library, meet friend, jog, bbq in evening at friends, stay as late as possible, go home and bed

Sunday, sleep til 12, back to library, clean my room, iron all my shirts ready for the next week, im useless at ironing so it will take a few hours (why when i iron one side of my shirt, does the other side drag on the floor and recrease? ironings just like going in circles, what am i doing wrong?)

ok i got a plan for the weekend, no one will be picking my pieces up on sunday eve....i promise you carol

from now on all junk mail goes in the bin....i have this thing for shiney mail...i just have to read it..but no more!

thanks Carol, i need a good wipping sometimes....

my weekend is going to be great!

AJ

05/08/06

thought long and hard last night. i think too negatively. every little thing that happens, i always think of the worst outcome, not the best. im always judeging what im doing, and was so concerned with what other people are thinking about me, i forgot what i think about myself.

Carol quoted in helpmestop's diary

i can see it quite clearly now, the gambling was very much secondary to or as a result of how i was feeling, and i think i might have wanted to use the gambling as a form of self punishment.

it is so true. i thought about this one this morning. my negative thoughts have lead me to self punish by playing poker, where i feel comfortable. or at least where i used to feel comfortable.

i dont want to keep thinking negative. time to start looking at the positive. im young, i have a good job, i can be debt free in 2 years, i have some family that care, i have my health.....im sure theres more, but i thinka good exercise would be to list all the negatives, and put a plan in place to tunr them all into positives in the next year.

Negative: i have slipped twice

Positive: but ive learnt from each one and i havent end up back to square one after each slip, just taken a few paces back

i realise my negativity is no good for me or others here reading my posts, so heres to a new way of thinking.....i will get though this

AJ

okkies AJ, have a try at this one.

its really working for me

Read this a couple of days ago, and thought i would give it a try.

Listen to your thoughts and choose which thoughts you want to continue to listen to and which ones you want to get rid of.

Try and keep the ones that are

positive

beleving in you

non-judgemental

encouraging

supportive

unconditional

wanting the best for you

isolate the thoughts in your head that are not supportive or

obstructive then you will be left with the thoughts that fuel your strengths.

Good stuff eh??

Today is a good day, and i am living every moment to my full potential

Hello AJ

How are you doing?

I think about you and hope you are getting on ok.

Best wishes

Rosemary

06/08/06

Day 6......days are flying by this week

Im good thanks Rosemary, I hope things with your son are ok. Have you directed him to this site or the mentioned the help line in your communications with him? Wish you the best

No need to pick up my pieces carol 😉 what lacks in my life is someone to give me a telling off when i need it, not saying your telling me off, but just someone to say it how it is and not all the fluffy stuff that i hear alot.

but my new positive way of thinking is working. I had urges today, so i went out and did other things. i even dug my playstation2 out, havent used it yet, but will borrow some games from someone and will hopefully be a weekend time killer from now on.

anyway, my house mates are cooking me dinner today, so have to go, will try and make chat in evening, but im glad im spending more time with my house mates....to quote the famous....its good to talk 🙂

AJ

Hi AJ, back from holidays and catching up on posts. You are right about junk mail, its a pain in the backside. Glad you didnt give in, the feeling we get by abstaining is a much better one than the S****y one from giving in!!!

I reakon once you get into the Sony Playstation you will find another addiction!!! but one thats only draw back is developing crosseyes and repetitive hand strain.

Its surprising as well, once we start to have spare time, how good it can be just spending time with friends.

Good on you AJ, Joy x

Hello AJ

Just read your post. If you were my son, I would be proud of you. Getting stuck into other things to take your mind off gambling is the right thing to do. Enjoying the company of your friends again is wonderful.

I haven't heard from my son for a while, but I have sent him a message asking him to get on this site, I think it would help him.

keep up the good work.

Best wishes

Rosemary

Well done AJ. It was a brave thing to go into that Samaritans place and you are more of a man for doing so. I applaud you.

07/08/06

JOY! good to see you back and well (and no doubt tanned!) hope youre getting over those post holiday blues - i can never look at ictures after a holiday - puts me right back in the "i wish i was there" mode 😛

Thanks for your post Rosemary, very touching. i only wish my parents woul be as supportive as you are to your son....he doesnt know how lucky hes got it. Hang in there, things can only get better.

Going to see the sams on weds, knocked up a list of things i want to talk about. looking forward to it.

well a week crossed off...why does it feel like time is flying....yet i was only gambling last Monday?

AJ

Hello AJ

Reading your posts gives me hope for my own son. I will be watching your progress.

I hope life is kind to you.

Best wishes

Rosemary