Toughest unwanted battle imaginable

Hey Wisy, Thank you so much for dropping some kind words on my thread. Depression, heartbreak, loneliness... those are very familiar words to me. I started taking medicine again for depression. And I will start hanging out again (I have isolated myself for a while) and enjoy my life again. One step at a time. When you get out of depression, you will start thinking and seeing things differently, I guess... I hope.

Hi Merlins, relationships and loss of loved ones and loss of pets make me ever so depressed and then it takes over so it is all a lot to deal with and is hard to get out when it is always raining! It will get easier for us both at least we are both on medication, it does take the edge off things especially at the beginning, I just wish there weren't so many a*******s in the world, or I need to avoid a*******s, that is probably the better option. All the best mate.

Hi Wilsy,

Fantastic going on the 113 days. Keep going strong, I've just read you diary and I was willing to still be gamble free and you are. Great going and may it continue for ever and a day.

All the best, Jam

Morning Wilsy. Hope your feeling good today. It is wonderful to see your great progress on the recovery road.

People can sometimes seem annoying, their actions may be inconsiderate or in some cases they are just impossible to get along with. It might be best, when possible, to avoid such people or keep them at a distance. What other people do is their worry, the important thing is how we react to their influence on our lives.

We must be careful and strive to avoid bitterness, resentment or anger. These poisons will only corrode the vessel in which they are held.

Take care my friend and keep going forward with love in your heart...stephen

DAY 114

thanks Jaysam and Stephen the Strong.

Anger is a motion we all go through when mistreated, resentment and bitterness I try to avoid as it doesn't sit well in my loving heart and you are right will only corrode the vessel in which I am held. I can move forward knowing I did everything I can with the right and normal intentions, just need to shut off and think of myself and my family and friends. This is just a sad chapter in my life but a learning curve, in the future things will look better and I will find someone worthy of me.

Can't believe I haven't had a gamble in 114 days, told my mum this morning and she is so proud of me, she told me on the phone that I have been so much my old self over the last 2-3 months and she can see the changes for the better. She has transferred me £30 this morning to get me through the weekend, something she is happy to do all the time I don't gamble. She see's my bank transactions every week, she knows I am trying so hard and she and my dad are supporting me with turning my life around. I have slept so much better over the last two nights, I am eating, my anxiety has gone, I am at peace with myself and the world, work has improved and I feel more confident. There are still some issues there but I decide to turn my brain off, I have spent too long and too much energy worrying about other people and now I've had enough and I am putting myself first for a change.

No gambling urges whatsoever, I am so, so happy about that.

Have a great day everyone.

Wilsy x

Hi Wilsy!

Firstly congrats on your amazing time g free! Keep working at it daily, things will get better.

As I noticed myself, after longer period g free we start seeing the world in different light. More options comes along. I say this because you just recently made massive decision and sounds like had a breakthrough in yourself 're your heartache. I truly believe that not gambling has helped you immensely here ☺

Keep going and discover so many things lined up ahead. Now you can see clearly, they're all there in front of you for the taking! ☺

Be proud & keep staying safe!

X

P.s. Jabadabadoooooo day today with it being Friday and last working day 🙂 Hope your weekend is full of peace and calm and contentment

Willsy, what a great post. I am thrilled for you matey. I'm also so pleased that your parents are backing you emotionally (and lets be honest, financially - that extra £30 will be a help).

I am on Sertraline for my depression and anxiety, I am going ok though the anxiety is still there around gambling.It will be for a while I guess, but I am on the right path now.

Have a good day

Hi Wilsy

Made my day reading your post this morning - really glad to hear you are feeling brighter and things are looking up.

Have a great weekend.

Muststop123

Thanks SB28, Burko and Muststop123, feeling tired this afternoon but much happier, appreciate again all your kind supportive words, have a great weekend everyone!

Evening Wilsy,

Thank you for your supportive comment on my diary. It is appreciated.

I hope to reach 114 days like you in.... 109 more days.. No more slips for me. Gravity boots are on!

You have a very good weekend to mate, chilly but hopefully some warm rays push through 🙂

Wilsy.as many others have said. you have been so supportive of us ...I'm new on here but you have taken time to read and support.even though you have had a few tough dips recently you have looked outside yourself to help others.well done on battling through.quite right that your mum is proud of you.keep fighting the down days .take care of you

Day 115

Up late so thought I'd post early, onwards and upwards 🙂

Hi Wilsy - thanks for posting - you made me chuckle! Great to read how your beginning to feel like your old self again - you are inspirational that you have been so open with your parents - I'm glad that they are so supportive - you have worked so hard and really deserve a break! Good stuff! Well done

Thanks so much cookie and annie life is certainly feeling more settled just one day at a time, no rush xx

Great post yesterday, I read this as be true to yourself. Your progress is inspirational and lovely to see! Fighting to be GF is hard enough but when you have other s*** to cope with sometimes it seem impossible but it isn't as you have proved. Take care of yourself S 🙂