Hi all
This is my second apperance on GamCare and my second recovery diary.
I don't know how long it has been since I was last on here but my best guess would be around 10 years ago.
I have been gambling for the best part of 25 years.
I have a very long story to tell and I actually started typing but realised I don't have enough time - as I am work!
I just wanted to start my diary now to stop me going into the bookies and investing the £50 which is burning a hole in my pocket as I need to get £1500 to cover my tracks!
I of course wont go into the bookies because I know I will lose and even if I was lucky enough to win - it would mean I would continue gambling and be in this position whenever that may be.
I need to stop and I need to stop now
Welcome back Mr Jones, you have been gambling for the same amount of time as myself. Well done on setting up your second diary and I wish you well in your recovery
Wilsy
Thanks for the message Wilsy.
I apologise in advance for the long and drawn out story but I reckon it may help me by writing or typing it all out.
I started gambling when I was about 15 years old. Just a bit of fun etc but this quickly developed into an addiction (which I know now). I craved having a bet and if I didnt have any money I would find some.
I have always worked since leaving school and had a decent job which was well paid. This of course allowed me to borrow money from banks etc who would fund my habit. I of course had some great days winning loads of money but it always eventually resulted in me losing and borrowing more.
Over the years I built up so much debt that I couldnt hide it anymore. My parents had already bailed me out a number of times and I promised them I would quit but never did! I ended a relationship because of it. I would rather end the relationship than come clean!
I ended up entering into an IVA with my creditors which had serious consequences with my proffessional career. As I was in the IVA I couldnt apply for soemthing that I needed to do. I therefore had to grin and bear it. Half way through my IVA I met a new partner (who is now my wife). I was open and honest with her about how I got into my financial mess and she supported me throughout. I was still gambling and she was aware of it at first but persuaded me to stop. I did for all of 5 minutes and continue to gamble without her knowing. As until yesterday I was still gambling without he knowledge. I have been with her for 7 1/2 years so you can imagine how decitful I have been.
I completed my IVA around about 6 years ago but almost straight away I started to build up debts again. As a result of me taking redundancy I was able to hide the debts that I had allowed to build up and esentially nearly pay all of them off. But i continued to gamble.
I have two beautiful children with my wife and have managed to hide all of this from them.
Got to go but will finish my story tomorrow - work calling!
Just keep writing everything down mate as it will help you.
Wilsy
No time to continue the story today - but a better day - no gambling and the £50 is still in my pocket - well in the bank
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