I prayed I'd never be back but here I am. Previously my boyfriend had lied for 3 years before I found out about his gambling and 12k of debt. I stuck by him, paid off a big chunk of the debt which he paid me back in full. Things were looking up.Â
But recently I started getting this niggling feeling again. I asked to see his bank account a couple times and he refused - first time because he said he'd bought Xmas presents and didn't want me seeing the payments. Second time he said he was plotting something.Â
The kicker is we've been together 10 years and aren't engaged. So every time he alluded to making plans, I assumed he was planning a proposal, so I didn't insist on seeing his bank account.Â
Last night I was super suspicious and for first time ever I went through his bag and found a letter from the bank alluding to a £3.5k overdraft. I again started asking if he'd gambled without saying I knew about the letter. He said no. He then told me he'd put deposits down on things for a proposal and didn't want to ruin the surprise.Â
Honestly I almost believed it, until he swore he no longer had a credit card. I then confronted him and of course it all came out. He managed 1.5 years then relapsed in September. He's over 8k back in debt after blowing all his savings that I'd helped him build up.Â
I'm heartbroken. I told him if he lied to me he'd be out the door, but the reality is so different. I can't imagine my life without him. I don't want to be without him.Â
Is there any way past this?! Is there any hope left?Â
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