Hi Joined yesterday and looking for advice for a family member who was with Gamblers Anonymous 20 years ago, then resisted temptation until recently when a very stressful situation led to online gambling, then debt. He has disabilities and is in residential care. Social worker and staff all see the gambling as a premeditated choice, not a real problem. In my son's words, "I can't trust myself" Has anyone else had the problem of people refusing to accept that gambling can be a hardcore addiction, and that support is needed to manage it? Nearest Gamblers Anonymous group is 40 miles away, and the cost of transport there would further add to the existing debts, so that doesn't seem to be an option.
Very much so Stephen. Many see gambling as a choice that can be put on and taken off as easily as a coat. I wish it was so.
Not all gamblers are addicts but they can become so, however even a problem gambler can affect the family and those they love in negative ways.
I'm sure one of the family members will be on shortly to support but I'd say don't give up on Gamcare and GA. Gamcare can offer him counselling and GA may be 40 miles away but I know I wouldn't be recovering without it.
Gamcare can offer you counselling as well Stephen. Its a valuable tool. Tri
Hello angel_stephen
Welcome to the forum. I'm very sorry to hear about your son's relapse which you feel was triggered by a stressful event. It sounds like you feel that the staff and social worker working with your son don't recognise this as a gambling problem as such, but rather that he is choosing to gamble and therefore he should be able to stop. Of course a person can both make a choice to gamble and feel unable to stop gambling. From what you've said, I can imagine that it would be really difficult for your son to stop gambling as he describes that he cannot trust himself. In this respect he may find it helpful to take certain practical steps to allow him to feel more in control of his gambling. Someone else he trusts could help him to restrict access to his money, for example by having his bank card/s. He could also self-exclude from the sites he is using or install some blocking software to make it more difficult to access online gambling.
I'm sorry to hear that you've experienced a lack of understanding so far but know that there's a lot of support here for you and for your son. You are right, support is often needed in order to recover from a gambling problem. We offer a range of help via the helpline/netline as well as the forum and chatrooms online. We also offer face-to-face and online counselling. If the support groups are too far for your son to access, perhaps he may wish to consider accessing counselling with us?
Best wishes
Laura
[quote=Forum admin]
Hello angel_stephen
Welcome to the forum. I'm very sorry to hear about your son's relapse which you feel was triggered by a stressful event. It sounds like you feel that the staff and social worker working with your son don't recognise this as a gambling problem as such, but rather that he is choosing to gamble and therefore he should be able to stop. Of course a person can both make a choice to gamble and feel unable to stop gambling. From what you've said, I can imagine that it would be really difficult for your son to stop gambling as he describes that he cannot trust himself. In this respect he may find it helpful to take certain practical steps to allow him to feel more in control of his gambling. Someone else he trusts could help him to restrict access to his money, for example by having his bank card/s. He could also self-exclude from the sites he is using or install some blocking software to make it more difficult to access online gambling.
I'm sorry to hear that you've experienced a lack of understanding so far but know that there's a lot of support here for you and for your son. You are right, support is often needed in order to recover from a gambling problem. We offer a range of help via the helpline/netline as well as the forum and chatrooms online. We also offer face-to-face and online counselling. If the support groups are too far for your son to access, perhaps he may wish to consider accessing counselling with us?
Best wishes
Laura
Thank you Laura. It's encouraging to know that this group is able and willing to offer support and if necessary give the advice that is needed. It's good to talk to someone who understands the problem.
triangle wrote:
Very much so Stephen. Many see gambling as a choice that can be put on and taken off as easily as a coat. I wish it was so.
Not all gamblers are addicts but they can become so, however even a problem gambler can affect the family and those they love in negative ways.
I'm sure one of the family members will be on shortly to support but I'd say don't give up on Gamcare and GA. Gamcare can offer him counselling and GA may be 40 miles away but I know I wouldn't be recovering without it.
Gamcare can offer you counselling as well Stephen. Its a valuable tool. Tri
Thanks Tri. Having this support is very encouraging. I will pass on all comments to my son.
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