33 year old woman struggling to stop!

I want to post but i have just signed up and read this and i cam 100% relate to everything you have written i am in the exact same boat i dont know what to do. 

Posted by: @adviceplease

So I’ve been gambling since around 2017 someone at work mentioned slots to me and a previous ex partner used to play now and again I was also told about matched betting but was reluctant to believe in it at first…..fast forward to now and I feel like I have a problem which I have talked to family about but I find it embarrassing like a failure shameful I’ve also borrowed money to help with bills but I can no longer ask for any more

I tell myself matched betting is the good betting it’s not gambling as such but why do I get so tempted to do silly gambling like live game shows I wish I’d never found those I won £8000 in matched betting and blew it in a matter of hours on slots in 2020 only just got over that! I want to stop I don’t know how to I’ve blocked my bank cards but unblocked them etc Vicious cycle I know I can self exclude but I think to myself if I can get out this stupid mindset then there is matched betting which does actually make money just need to be disciplined

I worked fulltime before taking maternity to which I found myself ‘bored’ with a toddler running around, selfish I know! time is precious I just can’t see what I have in front of me and my own mother has told me this, so I am starting a new job soon and I feel like this maybe the answer

Anyway for me this is my issue when I see money in the bank it’s just a figure a number I don’t see it as physical money I would never walk into a bookies I just do online gambling mainly the game shows which have ruined me slots in the past as well but every time I get any money I play and then chase losses and can’t stop thinking about how I can make the money back again fell behind with main bills rent, council tax, electric etc I just want to change my mindset but I don’t know how every month since October I have gambled every bit of money I have sometimes I have won big then got greedy and gambled the lot what an idiot hate myself I really do

I can relate to you so much being a 38 year old woman. I thought hardly any women got a gambling addiction, but it’s nice to see we are not alone. That feeling of shame is all part of the depths of despair gambling takes you to. There is nothing to be ashamed of, and you are here doing the best thing you can for yourself now. Work on a day at a time. I am only on day 62 gamble free, but I’m starting to like myself more already. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself and work firstly at controlling the urges. I find positive podcasts, relaxation apps etc to be really helpful. You’ll find what helps you too. If I can go 62 days free, so can you. There was a time I couldn’t go past 1 day. Sending hugs 

Well.done good luck guys 

Hey guys nice to meet you all. At 56 I'm a good deal older, but proof that gambling addiction in women has been a long hidden problem, also if you look at recent stats sadly the number of women admitting to suffering gambling addiction is by far outpacing men. I'm here to give you some support and to tell you that you can regain your lives and self esteem. It is hard work especially to start with and requires a lot of self reflection. Gambling turned me into a person I didn't like a person who was deceitful, lied and cheated. Today I am 630days gamble free, my mental health is good and I've been set free from the downward spiral I found myself in. Read as much as you can on here, take notice of what works and also what doesnt. I took notice of people who were successful in recovery and used the tools that they used. Therefore my advice and what has worked for me is 1 Block access to online sites Gamstop/Gamban....be decisive show you are determined exclude for a long time...I've excluded for the maximum I'm glad I did I know after say 3 months I wouldn't have been able to resist, now I'm much more certain I could resist, but why put temptation in my way...there's no need it's self torture. Gamstop runs out for me 5th June 2025 I will renew it, my husband knows when my 17yr old son knows when they won't let me forget. 2 my husband is in full control of our finances now there is full transparency...he would know if I gambled....our marriage would not survive it again. I had to tell my son what I had done his acceptance,willingness to help me was truly truly humbling. I couldn't do that to him again. 3 Accept help to work things through. Gamcare will refer you for counselling it really helped me come to terms with what id done and helped me move forward. Also Gamblers Anonymous where you can sit and talk in a non judgemental environment and who know " who u are " without explanation. There is more I'm sure but I find writing so much draining !! So I'll sign off with...after 21years of gambling that started as an innocent game of bingo and escalated into destructive online gambling with huge amounts of money...You can all enter recovery, you can all do this, take a leap of faith...I'm happy now ,you can be too

I have had a problem for quite some time, on numerous occasions I have spent all my wages trying to claw back the £30, £50, £100, £200+ loss. Thinking the next spin will get me back on track and then I’ll stop. But yet after so many years I should know better... I do know better! I just keep doing it. It’s such a vicious circle.

I’ve previously admitted to my husband my problems, he was understanding and supportive and we worked through it. Since then I got better, but then these last few months I just thought ‘what if’ and have done it again... 

I am scared to tell him again and don’t know where to go for support. I sat crying in bed this morning, hating myself. Then I clicked on Google and typed ‘Gambling Addiction Help’. Which has brought me here.

I’ve read quite a few posts and as awful as it sounds, it’s nice to see I’m not alone and I have high hopes that if I continue on here and reading/responding to people, I can get through this! 

Thank you to everyone on here for being so open and honest. We’re all in this together and deserve a happier, healthier life x