I'm new here and 5 days gamble free after being a complusive gambler for 20 years. My head already feels so much clearer knowing I have blocks put it place at every angle.Â
I started gambling when I became friends with a lady who became my best friend. Her and her family were already chronic gamblers but I didn't know this. Before I met her I had never stepped foot into an arcade.Â
Every time I saw my friend she would drag me along to casinos and the first few times I just sat and watched but seeing her win made me put £20 in. THAT was the worst decision I ever made!Â
20 years later ive lost a lot of friends and family due to my addiction. Suffer with severe depression and anxiety and contemplated suicide on a few occasions.Â
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I have children but they never went without and I have a lovely home but any spare money I had went on online slot machines. Thankfully ive never been able to get credit otherwise I'd owe thousands of pounds left right and centre.Â
I've known for 5 years ive had a problem and successfully permanently excluded myself from most places online but there were a few I didn't. I so wish I'd found Gamban sooner,Â
I'm not ashamed of what I've done. I'm aware it is an illness. One I no longer want to suffer from. This week has been a massive eye opener for me (after blocking myself from online slots) I feel a million percent better about myself. Not tired because I've sat up all night like a Zombie throwing away money I don't have.Â
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I am determined to succeed. 1 day at a time. Because my children and I deserve better.Â
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Thanks for readingÂ
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Welcome @loisg42
I am not far into my journey either.
It is great you have put all blocks in place to help deal with the urges. Often willpower alone isn't enough to deal with this. I am finding this out too.
I understand the regrets you have about the first £20 you put in. I think sometimes we don't recognize the potential for harm when we start and think we'd be able to stop.
My biggest regret was accepting a 'risk free' casino spins offer a few years ago. Turned out I wasn't able to handle online slots the way I thought I would.Â
We can't rewind the past but I suppose we can learn from the mistakes and what we can/cannot handle in a healthy way.
I wish you the best in your journey! It is a tough fight but it will be worth it.
Best wishes.
Well done, one day at a time, I lost thousands lost my savings my pension pot, contemplated suicide but put blocks in place, it’s been a few years but I have only a small amount of debts left, I have savings and I am building my pension pot back up, it is hard for an addict, I have relapsed a few times, there is always a site not covered by blocks but I am getting better, it is an illness, be strong good luck x
Well done ? I’m currently on day 17 GF and I’ve never been prouder with myself.Â
I take it each day at a time and hopefully I’ll be looking at my month GF soon enough.Â
just keep fighting and we’ll beat this ?
We’ve very similar timescales, I’ve been gambling since 1998, last 3 years, every day. Lockdown (I blamed!!) but it was my choice.Â
only difference is your casino/slots and I am sports betting.Â
I am compulsive but even from the age of 16 I never understood the appeal of a fruit machine, growing up, poker etc THANK GOD! Â
I am 4 weeks TODAY since my last deposit and bet! Paid off money for a holiday 2023 and enjoy football just as much without the anxiety of a goal, corner or a booking!Â
will follow your journey and I use my personal thread as a journey. Good luckÂ
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