Hi,
I'm new to this forum and want to explain firstly what brings me here. I'm now at rock bottom, I've taken some space away from my partner by moving back in the parents. She had become more and more concerned following my lies to cover up the debt I have been adding up.
Last November I won a big amount of money and managed to pay off all my debt that I had obtained all through gambling and left me with a positive bank account the first time in years. I'd told my partner about this win and she was so happy we would finally be able to enjoy life and start planning holidays and normal things couples do.
However this win made me feel invincible and I wanted more, but like everyone on this forum I hit a losing streak and before I know it everything had gone and I was borrowing again to fund the addiction always thinking that the big win would come back but it didn't.
The gambling has taken hold of me and I began to lie to the ones closest to me about where the money had gone and why I was unable to afford the most basic of things. Like many of you away from gambling I'm a normal guy but when the gambling takes hold like it has done recently I become a liar, aggressive, defensive idiot. I tell lies to everyone to make it appear I'm still winning and loving life but deep down I'm hating myself so much.
I have contacted a counsellor via this website and am awaiting an appointment, I hope this will be the start to recovery I don't ever want to feel as I do now. I want to gain the trust and love of my long term partner again and show her that I am a good bloke away from all the gambling.
Good luck mate all the best on the road to recovery..
Cheers mate you too
Good luck with your recovery.
This is first post i actually completely relate.i split with my mrs and moved back home 6 weeks ago. And i had the debt and then the big win which cleared it all.oh the relief i was ecstatic but then i was like hang on maybe i could win again.and as you would guess i did not and never did im on day 10 and its hand on heart first time i think i may be on the straight and narrow but im not letting that fool me. Keep your guard up and i always think the positives in everything and you will be suprised how it can help.eg im living back home firsr time in 10yrs but my view is lot less bills etc so quicker to get things straight.good luck mate all best dan
Cheers Dan.
all the best to with your recovery. Stay positive.
Had the first gamcare counsel session last week and all went well. I was apprehensive at the thought at first but quickly felt at ease. It was more of a checklist than an actual session to find out if counselling is going to be for me and I have booked in for the next session on 29/10. The female counsellor was friendly and not in any way judgemental, we had a brief chat about the problems and she suggested 8 - 12 sessions all of which are free. It was great to talk to somebody totally independent and looking forward to the next one.
Payday has arrived today and with a new bank account and limited access to funds (helped out by the better half) has helped. I'm not tempted to go down that path again and feeling for the first time in a long time positive for the coming weeks and months.
I would definitely recommend gamcare free counselling.
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