Gambling is a big nonsense

Always knew that I was delusional gambling my money away for last 25 years every time I had my hand on any kind of moneys.

Feel completely sick and tired of my self I have gambled since I was 16 years when I found my father dead in the house unexpectedly.

Since that day I developed stammer and anyone who knows how does that feel for stammerer to live in society like this would say that gambling was an escape route for me to feel ,,quite normal

Within years I spend thousand of pounds,got into debts,lost partnerships,friendships become very withdrawn from any social events just wanted to be on my own.

Today was the last bit I ended to confirm that I was living in illusion 10 thousands pounds which I borrowed today I put on single match to win 75 grand so I can pay off some of my debts.

Basketball match China Fujian to win at home vs xinijiang.

Match finished 103:104 xinijiang scored last 3 winings points in last 3 seconds of game played.

I felt sick literally sick,and sweat was pooring down me when it happened.

I have excluded myself from all forms of gambling today deleted my online banking cut credit and debit cards etc etc

I am starting long recovery road from tonight.

Anxiety is over the roof.

Good luck everyone with your journeys