Getting off the merry go round

Hi All,

I just wanted to post on here to say hi and to say that I've had enough of gambling and that I want to get off the merry-go-round.

I've been gambling for all of my adult life and for years have tried to manage it. It always ends up managing me though and I think 20 years of gambling is definetly enough.

I have some debt which is a pain in the a**e but is probably just about managable, and a fantastic partner who supports me and who I'm able to be open with. That, I know, is a true blessing.

I struggle quite a lot with making friends and letting people into my life though most people would have no idea.
I'm popular at work and am easy going yet very few people know much about me at all. And that is the hardest thing with gambling for me. I thought that it was loosing money and chaing loses but it is the crutch of disconection.

When I'm gambling I don't have to encounter anyone or my feelings. I can focus on what I'm doing for hours without thinking about things I don't want to think about but in doing so I've missed important times and conections with those I love. And that has become a terrible habit for me. Money I can make but I can't make more time to spend doing the important things. I feel particulalry s**t about that but I know that I have to let that go. Feel those feelings, acept them for what they are and then let them go. Easier said than done but a least being aware is the start of what needs to be done.

I can work at changing and will work at being a better partner, father, son, brother, friend to those I care about.

If you are reading this then I guess you know the challenges of problem gambling, where ever you are on your journey. I hope that you all get and remain free from gambling and I hope that I can connect with some of you over the coming days, months, years and support you and get support from you in return.

Cheers,

Sam