Help needed

Could you slowly repay it or come to a payment plan with your mum?. Going to the bank would 100% mean prosecution or jail time for fraud and may not be the way forward

Thanks for your reply. I think the best approach would be tell my sister and we try and shield my mum from this. Perhaps we can work out a way through this together if I'm open and honest with my sister. Thank God my mum owns her own home but I feel utterly ashamed and can't believe what I've done. I've previously lost inheritance money and more but to steal from my own mother is just insane. I just can't see how I have got to this dark lonely place. Is there hope?

The only hope is you ,when things are tough like this that is when relapses start.
Can not blame anyone but ourselves, but we are all the same us gamblers,selfish deceiptful liars and we play the pity card so well.
If you want to stop you will if you want to make good you will.and if you think a small bet wont hurt or a quick 30 quid and i will stop you will never ever stop and be bailed out by people over and over untill there is no one left,hope you sort things out,you can make amends by loving and caring for your mum even more

Hi - you are right to discuss with your sister. The important thing here is to understand why you started and in your case following a bereavement. You are still the person you were before you started but sometimes when we are broken mentally, emotionally, spiritually or physically we find ourselves succumbing to something that will numb us and take us away from whatever it is that troubles us. Some it may be shopping or alcohol. I really think you need to contact Gamcare and get their specialist help with getting to the root and go from there. Rooting for you.

That's really very kind of you. Yes I see at it as similar to alcohol and drugs, a form of escape and numbing yourself from painful thoughts. Any suppport is welcome at this stage . I almost told my sister today. I said I needed to talk to her about something that happened. I actually think she would help to find a solution, she's very practical. Hopefully together we can protect my mum from the extent of the damage I've caused.

Hi cj1974

What a story my friend but on here you will see that this illness will make people do strange things and some very not nice things,
Here's what to do be honest if you are willing and honest you have a chance!!

I imagine betting firms never reimburse even though It was clear they knew I had a problem. I was being sent warning emails about my gambling. Is it worth talking to them explaining how desperate a situation I am in?

Hi sorry to see you going through this but I think you should go to the bank and explain what's gone on , unfortunately you're not protecting your mom you're protecting yourself. If we're talking substantial money how is your mom going to cope without the money? The only way to get it back is by going to the bank and telling them what you've done , otherwise the only person who has lost is your mom , sorry if it sounds harsh but it's the grim reality of your situation

Hi. ..id be very surprised if any betting company would be remotely interested...you deposited the money ...I think I'm right in saying the only time they would be liable is if you have excluded...but I'm not 100%..I'm sure someone will advise on the facts...
I'm assuming your thinking you could repay mum if the deposits where refunded ?
Have you spoke to your sister yet..it's best to do this asap. ..she may well find out that money is missing from mums account and it would be better coming from you...
Have you sought help in fighting your addiction...I rang the helpline..best move I made...I think you need to speak to your sister and hand over access of mums accounts....before she's left with nothing....then what will you do ....I know it seems a real mess at the moment love....but it will only get worse the longer you leave it....and deffinatly if you continue to use her funds for gambling...good luck ....

If I go to the bank what is the likely outcome? She had no idea so I imagine they have to refund as it is fraud . Am I likely to be prosecuted? This is an absolute nightmare of my own making. I'm worried this will destroy my mother too.

I'm not really sure love..but potentially yes...they would refund mum...and possibly look to prosecute I would imagine..
Talk it through with your sister..

Do you think the bank would have to refund? Would it be up to my mum if she decided to prosecute? I know she could never bring herself to do that and she knows I have sought treatment for addiction in the past .

I'm thinking it would be up to the bank...not your mum...
Then I assume the bank would report to police...then I think it goes to the cps for them to decide if they have a case worth prosecuting ...which realistically they would have ..I'm not sure if that's exactly how it works...but it's along those lines....I really think you have to speak to your sister ....your mum's money needs to be given to her to control....if you end up spending it all....which you will if you carry on gambling....she's going to find out anyway....better you tell her first...I'm sorry if I've come across as blunt...but you've got to get support to sort this...

What's the best advice do you think? I can feel myself just giving up hope on a daily basis.