Hi
Finally realised I can’t go on like this.
I’ve been gambling for 20 years. It started out being an occasional fun activity. Fast forward to 7 years ago and it was a fully blown addiction to slots and FOBTs
I managed to stop for over 3 years but then it crept up on me again - I had got complacent, money was plentiful and my support network had relaxed controls. It was weekends only initially but soon took hold. After about 18 months and large losses I got the slots under control. I now realise the problem was wider than that but since then have been kidding myself that if I could control the slots it would be ok. The reality is I have been gambling more and more on sport to the point where it is an obsession and recently lapsing back onto slots. I haven’t been in a bookies for 7 years but who needs to when it’s online?
So today I am coming clean with myself and it’s time to stop for good. I know what’s out there to help and am using it.i have been bottling this up for too long. Last time I was told of the consequences from those close to me if it happened again and I am scared about coming clean despite the scary debt I find myself in (Ithough I am doing this before I become completely unable to pay the bills).
I am in a dark place inwardly even though none of my friends or family seems to have any idea what’s going on. Speaking to the helpline earlier and writing this will let me start to move on and rebuild and look fowardsIt’s going to take time, some sacrifices and swallowing of pride but I will get there.
Hi Fudgebrownie24, unfortunately, complacency is something that brings many back to gambling. It wasn't until I accepted that it's a life long illness did I change my focus on the importance of recovery. When I relapses, it took me 11 years to find my way back to recovery after nearly committing suicide. Well done for coming back. What is your recovery plan?
Please sign up to gamstop it takes away the online option
Thanks - hearing other stories on here including yours puts it into perspective.
yes with hindsight it was easy to start again. I had let accounts go dormant but not self excluded. I think the reason for that was that then my big problem was FOBTs so I went and self excluded from all the shops and went cold turkey. It was the “before smartphone” days.
This time I am planning to go down the Gamstop route as I just need to take online out. I’ve noticed that some firms i have accounts with aren’t on there yet so just going to have to self exclude and maybe use Gamban too.
I am still considering how to address things with relatives - thinking of asking for help with the worst of the debt in return for a pledge that I won’t gamble again backed up by giving them bank statements every month.
So after hovering over the button for what seemed like ages I have registered with Gamstop. I am not out of the woods yet - still need to tidy up accounts with some non participators but that instantly takes away access to 6 active online accounts (others are on time outs).
I spent last night kidding myself I could control things with a couple of accounts and small deposit limits but I know I am kidding myself - in the same way as alcoholic can’t have only one drink it has to go completely.
Time to begin to move on and adress the mess.
T
Hi well done for taking these baby steps to recovery. I to have relapsed and have played out a thousand scenarios in my head. I could play small amounts, I'm OK betting on sport, I'll just play this £20 etc etc I've been in the clutches of gambling for years and for me I think total abstinence is the only option. Your situation was similar to mine in that I let my guard down and let it sneak back in. You have done well by trying to restrict access but remember to triangle.Time money location, remove one and it helps. So come on we can do this. I know your afraid to speak to someone over what's happened and yeah it'll be rubbish but it's a sign you know what to do. Whatever the future holds good luck.
It’s been 8 days gamble free now. It isn’t always easy and I am having to resist the tempting pull of the bookies for a cash bet on football or something.
What I have found is I have so much more time on my hands now I am using Gamstop and can’t bet online. I no longer retreat into my shell and spend all night staring at my phone or watching sport.
Still got problems to solve but feeling better than I have done for a long time.
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