Newbie as of today ,FOBT'S killing me slowly

Hi darren

I have been in a very Similar situation to you mate, welcome aboard!! Well done on taking your first step and ringing gamcare, I know it's not easy but it's worth it!!

i have been clean around 3-4 months and my sole addiction was the FOBT's aswell, I could control every other aspect of gambling but these machines were taking away my life!! I urge you to consider self exclusion, I credit this to 90% of my recovery as it really does help take away so much temptation!!

I wish you every luck!! You can do it, break the cycle and put in every barrier you can to help stop the chance to gamble.

Thanks PG , i actually tried a couple of weeks ago and the lad knew me as a regular but the photo and form filling in wasn,t possible at the time. Where i live there are 6 or 7 i frequent so i don,t do all my big losses in one go, today i lost a grand in a new shop, a suggestion made by Phil and in my eyes a decent one, was to cut up my debit card and physically have to go to the bank to withdraw the cash, which given my branch has only 2 in my area 4 and 7 miles away may be a good idea. It,s purely in the shop where my problem lies and i have no on-line accounts as i do not have the internet at home.

Hi Darren,

I'd agee with Phil's suggestion. You've got to make it nigh on impossible to gain access to cash. You will get gambling urges and having the strongest preventative measures in place does work. I've gotten to 162 days gambling free (2015 challenge on here helps me as well). I've obviously had urges but I've been unable to physically do anything about it due to barriers in place. Most of us on here will have been on the "feast before the famine" syndrome due to major losses and having to wait for next payday. Horrible.

Won't pretend your journey will be easy but it will feel good when you string together a few weeks of abstinence. What little money I have is mine now and not the bookies.

Hope my words have given you encouragement.

Take Care Now.

Yes cutting up the cards is a great idea!! There are 6 bookies in my town centre, 9 in total that I had regularly used, as long as they bear the same company name they will let the other stores locally know that you are excluded, I found this really hard to do, but after my first they got easier, I armed myself with as many passport pics as possible and went in as soon as they opened one sat/sund....job done, I can't access the FOBT's......so many times I have said I wanted to quit, when in truth I just wanted to stop losing, I found the key was the triangle (money, time, access) and putting in as many barriers as possible to stop me gambling......these machines are highly addictive, but we can beat them!!

best wishes!

Great to see you are taking some solid steps. Good luck with your exclusions, i felt a lot better after doing it myself.

Hi Darren

Well done on taking the first step, I'm also on the payday loan cycle which is causing me a lot of heartache (self inflicted I know) but don't let that cloud your desire to stop gambling.

I thought the only way out was a big win but its not and with the help of gamcare and this forum I've final started to beat this horrible disease.

I won't be easy but you can beat this, I know cos a month ago I was finished, 29 days later I can see a light at the end of this tunnel.

Good luck pal

Wellcome Darren.

I was in exactly the same position as you, I've been stopping gambling for 22 years but only actively done anything about it just I've a month ago.

My vice was also FOBT's.

You must self exclude from all shops in your town.

I would take up the advice re cards also as this will remove the ability to open online accounts should the urge take you.

I would suggest you look into GA meetings, you can find details of them near to you here ; http://www.gamblersanonymous.org.uk/index.php/ga-meetings/find-a-ga-meeting

Have a look over my diary I've made, I was dubious at first re GA meetings but the experience is no way close to be the daunting one you may envisage.

Chat room each evening 8-9 is also helpful I find.

I wish you well, and if you do only one thing, it is this, stay gamble free.

Thank you all for your kind words, 3 days now, admit that Sunday was horrendous and the urge to recoup my money was overwhelming. Just the stresses of texes and missed calls of Payday companies now playing on my mind. In a hole at the minute but can only come out stronger. I have a councelling session tomorrow with Aquarius so that,ll be a positive step.

Hi Darren,

Some really good comments have been left already, I think PG31 really hits the nail on the head. I'm 30 days clean and like PG I put a lot of that down to self exclusion from the bookies. I used to go to the one local to my office and lunchtime/after work was always very tempting. Now if the thought crosses my mind to gamble (which happens) then there's sod all I can do about it. Perfect. Also - I'm pretty sure you can just go to one local shop and you can ask them to send it around to all of the other bookies in the local area. I'd definitely recommend this.

As well as breaking the triangle, I think what's helped me the most is having an inner desire to be a better person. Us gamblers are brilliant liars, but not having to lie my way through to payday has increased my feeling of self worth tenfold. 30 days isn't amazing, but it's incredible how much better you can feel after such a short time.

Keep posting and keep trying.

Still not gambled since original post and one session with Aquarius so far, hard to stop thinking of the money i have 'lost' or could of won, guess councelling will change my mindset/ outlook on things. Really hard slog but feel proud so far that i have done 10 days.

Well done, it's not easy, stick with it.

One of the main hurdles is pay day - others on the sight find it v difficult to resist when the money's there. Can you hand over your finances to someone to get you past it? Or otherwise think now how to put barriers up? Normally one day at a time does work but pay day is the one thing you should plan ahead. Do not rely on will power.

Best wishes and good luck,

Cynical Wife

The cycle is a tough one to break but honestly starting a recovery diary on here and the help of others around you it does get easier , have you self excluded ?

I have self excluded from 3 shops local to me, the best thing i have done and a bit extreme is cut up my debit card, i now have to physically go into my branch with passport/ driving licence as identity in order to obtain cash. The bank is also a 15 minute car journey which also is a bonus. Means can't go into a bookies and continually bang £300 at a time on the machines using my debit card. As Cynical Wife said my issue is pay day but by putting these snags in place it does alleviate the chance somewhat.

Good luck with it but beware of taking too much cash out for emergencies.

BW,

CW