No more

Hi welcome, you need to put blocks in place if you really want to do it, I've been gamble free for 10 days and I couldn't have done it without this site and self excluding from all the online sites. Every day that I have not gambled makes me like myself a little better as I strive to get myself back on track , read some diaries on here and it does help and give you hope .

Hi,

I knew I had reached rock bottom before I knew I was ready to fight this addiction head-on. There was a combination of events that lead me to this dark place. Reaching rock bottom is a place no-one wants to go but is an important destination on deciding where to go next.

So my friend what are your plans?

Blockers blockers and self exclusion are both important. So is confiding with a faimily member or close friend. Come clean about everything, from the debts to the stealing. Having secrets stored away can easily lead you of the road to recovery back into gambling. Clean mind, clean slate was a big step for me with the wife. The debts are still there but that money is lost, we must move on. You can help on these too, Step Plan is mentioned on this forum a lot.

A change in lifestyle is also required. Have a look around yourself to see where and why you gambled and sometimes who with. You must try and avoid these scenarios.

Don't just try and STOP alone. Not impossible but a difficult option, well my opinion anyway.

Hope to hear from you soon.

All the best.

Hello

Ermmm I dont really know where to start. It's 8.49am and I havent been asleep. I woukd say in the last month and a bit I've been bailed out by my family 3 times. I feel like I'm stuck in this hole and I can't get out. I feel like everyone is better off without me. I haven't been gambling for many years. Maybe 3......but it has all escalated very quick. I'm one of those people that doesn't talk about my problems because I never want to burden anyone. Then it all gets so bad it blows up. I'm hoping I can find the strength to get through this.

Does anyone have any good tips. I've lost all interest in anything I loved. I feel like my concept of money has gone crazy. I won't go and buy myself a £50 pair of shoes but I will go and blow 5k on blackjack or roulette.

This is my first time here I'm hoping it's gonna help

I wish it was that easy. For me online is dangerous. It never feels like real money you can just keep adding money. There's been times where I've won 15k 7k but I keep going till I loose it all.

I'm giving up control of my money for a while. I think it's the best thing

I just wish I could see a way out but right now I can't

Hi Redbear,

Your story sounds a lot like mine. I was all on-line but didn't need the bail out. All my debt over the 3-4 years was on credit card. As long as I could afford the monthly repayment that's all that mattered!

I suppose one day I woke up to the fact I needed to change many things.

I now attend GA and are gamble free for 8months. I don't know what the comment from Londoner is pointing at, hopefully they may explain. GA is a great place, without it I know I wouldn't be in the position I am today. Give it a try, like any meeting the first is the hardest with nerves, new faces and the confidence issue. So give it at least 3-4 meetings before deciding if it's for you or not. GA is not what many people think it is. Don't knock it before you try.

You may wish to start your own thread in the "newbies" section. Have a read in the diaries section it's really helpful.

All the best.

Hi Redbear,

Your story sounds a lot like mine. I was all on-line but didn't need the bail out. All my debt over the 3-4 years was on credit card. As long as I could afford the monthly repayment that's all that mattered!

I suppose one day I woke up to the fact I needed to change many things.

I now attend GA and are gamble free for 8months. I don't know what the comment from Londoner is pointing at, hopefully they may explain. GA is a great place, without it I know I wouldn't be in the position I am today. Give it a try, like any meeting the first is the hardest with nerves, new faces and the confidence issue. So give it at least 3-4 meetings before deciding if it's for you or not. GA is not what many people think it is. Don't knock it before you try.

You may wish to start your own thread in the "newbies" section. Have a read in the diaries section it's really helpful.

All the best.

Hey redbear,

I've only just started my recovery but the one bit of advice I can give you is that you need to stop getting bail outs from your parents or anybody else for that matter. My parents and girlfriend bailed me out the last time and cleared a massive amount of gambling debt only for me to get into the exact same position. It was too easy. I'm now learning the hard way after blowing all my wages on payday. Non more bail outs. I have nothing but I'm starting to understand this addiction now because of that.

Totally agree with the above. Bail outs are food to CGs.

However I think a non gambling family member would always help a loved one in their hour of need. They don't know the mind of a CG, they offer the money as a way of support. This action should never be repeated but is difficult not to do so, especially how the deceiving mind of a gambler works.

So Bail-outs are bad but will always will happen. Again it comes down to the CG really wanting to stop or not.

Thank you all for your comments. I have debt now that I'm paying off myself which I do feel is better. Like you guys said when you have to pay it yourself it's more real and less likely for you to go back.

For me it's once I start I can't stop. But when I've had a break I stay away. Normally something triggers it in my personal life. I just need to start to work towards how I deal with situations and my anxitey and not look too gambling to take my mind off things.

Shep72 what happens in a GA meeting....do you have to talk......can you sit and listen?

Thank you all for your comments

Emily it's so difficult. I feel like I'm on this never ending treadmill which I'm sure you feel the same to.

For me I can't carry on like this anymore. I'm fortunate that any debt I do have (about 10k) I can pay it back over time but it's the knowing that it's there that makes me anxious. I have to change because this isn't the life I want and I'm sure it's not the life you want. Are you seeing someone professional about this if so how's it's going?

Redbear wrote: Thank you all for your comments. I have debt now that I'm paying off myself which I do feel is better. Like you guys said when you have to pay it yourself it's more real and less likely for you to go back. For me it's once I start I can't stop. But when I've had a break I stay away. Normally something triggers it in my personal life. I just need to start to work towards how I deal with situations and my anxitey and not look too gambling to take my mind off things. Shep72 what happens in a GA meeting....do you have to talk......can you sit and listen? Thank you all for your comments

Hi,

GA is what you want it to be. No, you don't want have to speak. You do as you wish. Tell the host of the meeting if you wish not to speak. Eventually you will want to speak even if it is something you don't agree with. The "room" is a special place, honestly. You will mature in that room from a new member to someone who can give advice. But most of all you are there because you don't want to gamble.

Thanks

I wonder sometimes if I have an addiction or if gambling was just something that would take my mind off things in my life.

I know when I gamble I tend to keep going. Sometimes I cash out wait a few days then go back but always in the end I end up loosing everything. But when I do stop I don't really cave gambling I don't miss it.

Am I addicted.....

Samson wrote:

Emily - Gamcare can arrange 12 free counselling sessions for you and when they end, you can look into resuming again.

Emily this is what I am doing through a company called options in the Uk.