Hi all first time using Gamcare. Signed up with Gamstop tonight too. I have been trying to quit gambling for over 3 weeks now. I did some soul searching and deep reflection. I got to the root cause of why I was self saboutaging and gambling. I was so focussed for 4 or 5 days then I just went on a downward spiral and fell back in to the habit of gambling.
I work in the gambling industry so I am surrounded by it day in day out, I have responsible gambling conversations on the daily. Yet, I am here, writing this having the inability to control my own gambling. It is online gambling it is just so easy to find a new site.Â
Even when I was winning and saying to myself I will cash out, it never happened. The thing consumes my mind. I play hours aimlessly just living in the loop to loop of slot machines, I don't even enjoy them. Yet I am consumed by them. I feel numb when I am gambling, I don't get a rush, I don't get any sort of emotion from it. Even when I lose I don't feel anger, mad or disappointment.Â
I have an issue, I know I do, I have burned through my savings in quick fashion. I have nothing to show for the money. Lesson learned maybe.Â
I am being soft on myself with this process, as I am not my relapse, I am the person that signed up for gamcare today. I am still reaching out and the person who wants something better- even if it feels a million miles away at the moment.
Day 1 ... lets get the 24 little hours out of the way. If you read this and you're struggling... you've got this.
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