Thank you everyone for the posts on this site. I have just spent the last few hours reading through, realising I do have a gambling problem and desperately want help.
Let me tell you a bit about me and what has brought me to this forum tonight.
Since a young age I always remember my dad betting at the horses and my mum going to bingo 3 nights a week. Gambling played a big part in my life and I suppose I just followed suit. The difference being my mum and dad both gamble what they can afford to lose, whereas me, I gamble until I have nothing left.
When I was 15 I remember being introduced to shoot pontoons, my mate from school was brought up in a family who loved to gamble and introduced our friends to the game. The buzz, the excitement and the thought of winning money, I was hooked straight away. After that my mate then introduced me to the bookies. At 15 we both looked older so would regularly go spend the day marking our horses, dogs, football coupons, anything really.
As the years passed I got involved casinos, bingos and online gambling. I have a great job and a great family and I am now 27 with no savings and nothing to show for the money I have spent over the years. I seem to think it’s okay to spend 500 - 600 a month at the local bingo hall sometimes spending 200 a night, then afterwards making my way to the nearest casino. No matter how much I win it is never enough. I go and give it all back because I want to win more. I borrow money from friends and family and I am up to my eyes in payday loans. I have often miss payments on my car having to phone the company to take the payments as soon as I get paid, because if they don’t I will gamble it. There have been times when I have stolen money from my mum’s purse to gamble. It has now got to the point where my mum will hide her money from me. I am so ashamed at having to even write this and please don’t judge me. I know there is something wrong with what I am doing and I do need help. My mum keeps me from month to month providing food, fuel and money. Over the past few weeks I have just got so down about it all and really need to take the next steps to getting help.
Tonight I have phoned gam care who have taken my details and will pass these to a counsellor in my area. I am feeling nervous about the next steps but I am willing to do anything that will help me beat this horrible addiction.
Hi flatsbhoy
I take courage to come and write about on this forum
First no one here will judge you because we all been there ,done that and had the t-shirt to show for it
Here you will receive advice and help to beat the devil in you
I am now 68 days if I can do it you will be able to do the same ,by reading your post I can detect the desire to stop gambling and will the help you will have here everything is possible
Take care and try to fight back
Hi Flats.
Welcome to the forum. You have made the right choice my friend.
I admire your honesty. It's the first step in changing your life. It's what we all have to do to break this horrible, destructive life sucking disease. When you bring things out into the open it begins to break the power it has over you.
I spent 30 years feeding this addiction and living a double life. Having a face that i put on for the world and another that only i really saw. I've ruined relationships, broken people's trust over and over and wasted so much of my life chasing the "buzz" of gambling.
Like you i started early and have moved through the various stages of betting until finally settling on online sports betting and poker. There i found i could do it anywhere anytime. At work, at home on holiday. It consumed my life.
I am glad to say i am 8 days gambling free today and loving it. 8 days maybe doesn't sound a lot, but to me it's massive. I feel liberated, positive and happy for the first time in as long as i remember. I confessed to my partner and she has been amazing and as supportive as i could possibly have asked for. I am determined not to feel that shame anymore,that horrible ,overwhelming gut wrenching feeling of gambling away literally every penny i had. It's amazing that we're willing to live a life of misery just for those fleeting moments of exhilaration.
I apologise for rambling on, but i just felt after reading your first entry that you need to know that nearly every person on here has or is going through what you are. You're not alone! That has helped me so so much the last 8 days.
I wish you all the best in your fight. I hope we can encourage and help each other in the future as we beat this disease.
Davie
Hi Davie,
Thank you so much mate for your post. IO have read it over and over again and massive well done for 8 days, you should be mega proud.
Im on day 2 and feeling much better already. I have phoned the payday loan companies and set up payment plans so things are looking up.
Usually during the day at work all i think about is going home to play online gaming or head to the bingo hall and today all i could think of as coming home to read these posts.
Would be great if we could encourage each other.
Good luck and keep in touch š
Hi Julio,
Thank you very much for support and nice comments.
As mentioned above i am on day and feeling a bit happier that what i have been recently. I had a phone call from Andy to who has arranged counselling sessions that are local to where i stay.
Well done to you and keep up the good work.
hi flatsbhoy
I am glad to read that you are happier today and I wish more good days in the future
by staying away from gambling you will achieve more in your life .the past is gone stand tall and look to the bright future my friend
Have a good day and stay bet free
Good luck and well done to both of you guys. I'm at a similar stage
I am on day 14. I've only had a problem for 8 or 9 months but have managed to mess up my life a lot in that time. I'm totally sick of covering my tracks and will come clean to my partner at the weekend when she returns from holiday. I'm dreading it but also just want to get it off my chest whatever happens next.
I've tried to give up a couple of times , and have abstained for some fairly long periods, but I've since realised that I didn't really want to quit. I didn't install blocking software, or make use of the forum and chat room on here, or refer myself for help. This made it easy to binge or relapse. This time I have done all these things and feel like I can make a go of it. I guess I'm just saying put everything you can in place to help you stop.
I'll keep an eye on this thread too as I need all the help and support I can get.
Hi dot83
To quit gambling is first be honest
we are dishonest by default ,You need to come clean and open up to your partner.
My wife shouted,screamed at me but at the end of day I respect her more for staying by me and giving another chance
your partner need to know the truth and I think that she deserved it
In few weeks time you will realise how important that was to tell her ,because you need support and your fist support will be your partner
keep faith ,we can beat this illness
take care and stay bet free
Hey flats,
It's ok we do not ever judge as we are all in the same boat !!! I too have let my loved ones down and still feel ashamed I what I have done, but now from today I will get my diary or journal an every time I want to gamble I will log on to gamcare and read this forum I will also look at writing down in my journal what my feelings are and the consequences of what I might do if I spend this money I hope it is going to make a difference and I will let you know how it goes I asked to join the 2014 challenge and I am now going for it, your doing great,,,, don't look back now look forward and take one day at a time, as for your family it is the best thing ever that you are trying to change and with time you can prove that you changed yourself because really that's all they want to know that you can get through this ok, don't feel ashamed or embarrassed as we hear you and feel your pain, hopefully we will all be ok soon and we can share our joy at getting through this together as well xx good luck mate xx
Thanks so much you guys. I have just got home from work and my first thought again was gambling and i thought NO im logging into GamCare and reading this forum. I feel better already just reading what yous have wrote. The support is amazing and it really helps me get through this.
Day 3 and can i add my days at work have been much more productive. Im on the ball. Im really feeling and thinking positivley here and im excited about saving up and actually having money.
Good luck to you guys too and feel free to drop me a mesasage for a chat anytime.
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