Why didnt i just go to the gym!

I'm interested Ant. Some early advice that isn't going to cure the problem but will help prevent damage is that you must (and that's an absolute must) get some barriers in place. Self exclude from bookies? Take in a photo and say you're done. If you don't want to do that then you're still harbouring thoughts of gambling. Exclude from all sites and get K9 on your phone now. Ring up your bank and limit the cash you can withdraw on your card. Read other diaries and find similar tales. I didn't do this at the start but it now saves me hundreds each day.

Hi thanks for your sudden reply, since my first and only child was born in feb 2014 i have excluded from most bookies in my area leaving one. As bad as this sounds just in case i fancy a cheeky football bet etc whih always ends up resulting in hundreds of pounds in the fobts! i am going to self exlude tomorrow as for betting sites i have self exluded from most opened them in my girlfriends name self exluded from them and now just type in 'gambling sites' to google with the hope one comes up who i havnt given money to already actually reading this as i type sounds absolutley crazy how anyone would be that desperate to give there money away but its that buzz and escape i chase not the money, until the money is gone and that empty self destruct feeling occurs. as for this k9 i dont no what it is it would be great if i couldnt access any gambling sites how does it work? thanks.

Hi ant , excellent advice from change above , the k9 is software you can download for free to block your access to gambling sites , there are others available you can buy and gamcare will be able to give you details, you can set passwords and it would be better that someone other than you sets them to avoid temptation !.

You have to close all the doors so I suggest you exclude from the bookies you left open , the urges will come and when they do it helps if they can't get in !.

Best advice I can give , accept your losses , they've gone and there not coming back , stop chasing them and get on with your life . You said yourself its the buzz and thats the problem with us Compulsive gamblers its no longer about the money , just the rush , remember we cannot win because we cannot stop !

Thanks for the reply Alan i will look in to these site blocking apps tomorrow. if im honest the hardest thing for me is accepting the losses the constant thought of what i could have or should have bought with my money instead of loosing it all almost sends me crazy, which the gives me the insentive to go win it all back and buy the house/car i should have but as we all know it never happens nd i end up worse off, i will actually go the gym tomorrow spend more time with my son and play games that dont involve money to take my mind off the losses and hopefully after a while of not loosing anything i can eventually forget about it or at least put them thoughts to the back of my mind and move on with ymy life like you say.

Hi again , Yeah I'm afraid thats what hinders our recovery , the not letting go of the past losses but you must if you want to have any chance of stopping for good . I've gambled for over 35 years , never always had a problem only really the last few years and only with the Fobt's but I know I crossed the line now and can never have another bet again , I miss parts of it but not the way it made me feel or act .

Get used to the idea that its gone and ain't coming back and focus on that lad of your's , he's more important than the gambling !.

Maybe think about starting a diary on the recovery diarys page , you can talk to others and ask lots of question's or just post how your feeling , theres also a day counter on there that shows your gamble free day's which can be a help early in recovery , just get those blocks in place and break what we call tthe time , money , location triangle , if you remove one you can't bet !

Off to bed now so look forward to catching up with you later !

Take care for now and keep posting and let us know how your getting on , you can do it and its not rocket science , you just have to want to , more than anything else !

Best wishes ..........Alan

Have a look at the diaries page Ant, it's just somewhere you can write a few lines about your daily progress and not be judged. It will prove to be a good reference for you as the days pass and you'll soon realise that yes, you CAN do it. it's inspired me and I'm almost a week gamble free, first time in a year.

Agreed with letting go, your money is never coming back - the most you can win on a FOBT is a £500 jackpot, how many would you need to put you level? How many have you ever seen? (I've won three in a decade!) Let it go, start looking forwards instead of backwards. The best advice I ever heard on this forum (the first time around!) was that you only start winning the day you quit gambling. If you had a £50,000 accumulator come in on the footie would you stop? You might tell yourself yes, but I'd say it'd all be gone in a year, and more besides.

Compulsive gamblers are not wired the same way as recreational gamblers, it's always about more! I can't tell you how many times I've been hundreds of pounds up and satisfied with myself...for an hour. Then you start to think "hey, that machine was paying out...I hope I got all the value out of it" and you're back feeding £20 notes in.

Ant you can beat this pal. I'm only 33 so even though it seems that there isn't much between us age wise, if I could somehow go back in time and stop 26 year old me from gambling I'd have a nice car and my mortgage paid off now - honestly!

Sorry if this is not the right place to ask...looking for help installing k9 on my phone ...galaxy core prime...have any of you for it on yours...thanks...1week today no online slots...yeahhhh

Hi ant, I'm one for self excluding online then finding another site the next month, I've just uninstalled about twenty programs from my pc. I'm just starting again today an and I've been on here six months, good luck lets do it this time

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Your right kev no matter what you win you will always try and win more. When I recieved this lump some I thought all my problems were over but every time I bought something I found myself straight in the bookies trying to win the money back! It's amazing what we all could of had as we despise spending money but will happily feed these machines £20 noted until we havnt nothing left and nothing to show for it! Thanks for your wise words. Adam it's crazy isn't it but at the time you would sign up and give your details to anyone if it meant the chance to bet. Anyway day 1 is nearly over I have kept myself busy by putting up a wardrobe and listening to music to keep my mind occupied finding hard to accept the losses especially when my girlfriend was moaning about spending £70 on shopping and I blew £520 yesterday, it's enough to send you crazy but trying to stay positive and taking it one day at a time thanks all for your interest and advice.

Stay busy Ant. I got into podcasts during my recovery and I really like them. Find them a better distraction than music. See if there's anything out there that takes your fancy.

Put the barriers in place mate. Blocking software on the computer and pics handed in to self exclude at the bookies. I guarantee you can do it with those restrictions in place, you might not feel it but you are better off by hundreds of pounds a week just by not playing.

Try to be grateful for what you have instead of focusing on what you have lost. £5000 is still a lot to most.

It's great you've seen the signs and are doing something about it before you do that lot in. That's why you need to slam these doors shut. Will pool be won't do it.

Keep reading keep posting and keep positive and keep the faith

KTF

That's why us gamblers are so selfish we spend to much time concentrating on what we could of had and not appreciating what we do have then before you know it it's all gone. I'm going to keep reading and teaching my self to be grateful for everything I have even if I could of had more, It's gone and there's nothing I can do but try and build my life by working hard instead of looking for the easy way (the big win) I still havnt looked at blocking software yet and got some photos printed in sainsburys early for the last bookie i can get to easily once again thanks for commenting and will keep you updated good or bad.