I am a 49year old woman that has never gambled all my life until a year ago in march 2023. People in work would play online slots and it looked like fun. So one weekend in March I thought I would give it a try... big mistake...HUGE mistake! I deposited £20 and had some wins, that was it... I'm hooked. By November 2023 I was £5k in debt. I registered with gamstop convinced It would stop me. But it didn't. I started playing on non uk sites that are a total con but still couldn't stop. January 2024 I'm in £13k debt, depressed, anxious, isolating myself from others. Worried all the time about money. Eventually couldn't take anymore and told my partner of 20years what I had done. Total shock and horror but very supportive and helping me pay back what I owe. Said he thought I would be last person to ever do that as I was so good at saving up and paying things. Said it was a blip in my life and I would get over it. I agreed and said i wouldn't gamble anymore...believing I could stop. May 2024 I'm still gambling in secret. Hiding in toilets or waiting till late at night when i wont get caught. Scared to spend money on things i need but will spend hundreds a week on slots..what is wrong with me??? . Two weeks ago I found out about gamban....its has been my savoure. I still try every night to go online and gamble but gamban won't let me. I finally see a light at the end of the tunnel. I'm now 2weeks free of gambling and I'm feeling more up and positive already. Still ashamed and angry at myself for my debt and stupidity. Wish I could turn back time. I know I need to forget what has already happened and start to look forward and I'm trying. Thanks to gamban
There is no one kind of person who gets sucked into the gambling spiral.
Online gambling can feel like having a secret married lover - exciting, secret, sometimes he/she gives you a’gift’ and you think this time will be different. You will either end the relationship or live happily ever after. Sadly, they string you along until you lose all sense of reality.
I found thinking of gambling as a toxic lover helped me put an end to online gambling in December 2022. It took me a bit longer to realise that my other lover, land bingo and the slots there, was just as toxic and I stopped in October 2023.
I recommend reading The Girl Gambler and Tony 10. Tony 10 is better written but both provided me with a distraction and made me realise I was not alone in my distorted thoughts about gambling.
I also reached out to Gordon Moody and attended their Retreat and Counselling programme this year which was amazing and completely free of charge.
Come into the chat rooms here; they were invaluable in the first couple of months.
Put other blocks in place for bookies and land casinos even if you have never used them. If the urge strikes, never could turn into a visit.
Well done on reaching out on here.
Stay strong.
Lynn
Hi hopefully everything works out for you and its a real positive you have recognised the problem the money will come backto you that you have lost. now you are at peace with the fact that its long gone everyone makes mistakes in life and im glad you have a very supportive husband who is their for you. I would also contact moses to self exclude from all bookies casinos and amusement arcades just in case the temptation should arise to gamble gods blessings
I am a 49year old woman that has never gambled all my life until a year ago in march 2023. People in work would play online slots and it looked like fun. So one weekend in March I thought I would give it a try... big mistake...HUGE mistake! I deposited £20 and had some wins, that was it... I'm hooked. By November 2023 I was £5k in debt. I registered with gamstop convinced It would stop me. But it didn't. I started playing on non uk sites that are a total con but still couldn't stop. January 2024 I'm in £13k debt, depressed, anxious, isolating myself from others. Worried all the time about money. Eventually couldn't take anymore and told my partner of 20years what I had done. Total shock and horror but very supportive and helping me pay back what I owe. Said he thought I would be last person to ever do that as I was so good at saving up and paying things. Said it was a blip in my life and I would get over it. I agreed and said i wouldn't gamble anymore...believing I could stop. May 2024 I'm still gambling in secret. Hiding in toilets or waiting till late at night when i wont get caught. Scared to spend money on things i need but will spend hundreds a week on slots..what is wrong with me??? . Two weeks ago I found out about gamban....its has been my savoure. I still try every night to go online and gamble but gamban won't let me. I finally see a light at the end of the tunnel. I'm now 2weeks free of gambling and I'm feeling more up and positive already. Still ashamed and angry at myself for my debt and stupidity. Wish I could turn back time. I know I need to forget what has already happened and start to look forward and I'm trying. Thanks to gamban
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