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Why do we feel ashamed?

Because its not a rational thing to do with money we cant afford to lose.

Because its money you could have used for better things. The heart tugger here is that you could have handed it to someone less fortunate then yourself who could have bought something worthwhile with that money.

Because it sound like crazy behaviour to a non gambler or anyone with a proper use for that money.

Because its not healthy behaviour and perpetuates an industry that causes misery.

Because religions dont consider it moral behaviour and I agree whether I am religious or not

Because it makes you look like greedy (even arrogant) chancer or fool who thinks they know more than everyone who works for a living. ( leaving the depth of an addiction to one side for a moment)

Because you dont understand how your mind is controlling you = confusion and therefore shame

I would have slated you hard because any other reaction just isnt realistic

I understand its an addiction but the feeling of shame must creep in when admitting this is what I have done with that money.

Nothing personal You did ask about shame and every gambler knows all those reasons within two seconds of thought. Thats why the lows are extreme when all the money has run out and reality returns

Yes I'm very ashamed of what my past gambling caused

But no I am not ashamed to tell people, for the first time in twenty odd year I am proud of the better person I am becoming.

Lots of people know, I have told 17 family members, 8 friends, 12 work colleagues, 1 landlord, 47 bookies, 11 online website. Not to mention the users on here and all the people who walk through the GA doors.

Wow that's 30 odd people and I'm sure half of them will have told someone else

I have had disappointment from close f&f but that has changed over the days and weeks. Others have said they suspected I had a problem. The only real negative response I have had is from my now ex partner which lets be honest had every right to react that way.

This is how I have dealt with it. I'm not telling you to go and shout it from the roof tops this is just my take on it.

KTF.

Oh I absolutely agree that there is no shame in finally telling people. There is no shame in reaching out for help and being totally honest. Its the best thing you could ever do

Its just when those feelings of shame are bottled up in a secretive world fueling a gambling addiction.

Why? Because that is all part of an addiction. A personal battle. The ups & downs of a CG, we all loved the highs, hated the lows... The lows weren't a feeling you wanted to live with all your life so we need to feed our habit hoping, praying for the next high, so we bet again & again.

In addiction of whatever kind I wonder what the statistics are on the person owning up to their problems? I'm not expressing the fact I did, many others on here have also, but I was going under, didn't care win or lose, but I didn't like the person I was becoming with my family and friends. That's why I told my wife.

I still class myself as a but as one guy said in our GA meeting he wants to declare himself "a recovering compulsive gambling" maybe I will take this stance after 90 days bet free.

Good responses. I see the shame being the addiction and loss of values being the shamefull thing rather than the money specifically.

Also agree that opening up is an antidote to everything that's bad about gambling-ego, secrecy, exceptionality, aloofness

Louis