*** Join The Guru Challenge! ***

*** HERE'S WHAT LIFE'S ABOUT - BUMPER EDITION! ***

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Firstly a quick update: Gems - agreed; this casino operator's behaviour was a disgrace. And there are more to follow, from what I hear 😉 Athena - delighted you're on the GF road, motoring now. Enjoy bake off!!!!

Here are the final 30 ways to improve your GF life, once agan courtesy of SkyBlueBlue's fabulous diary. Tip: Take your time reading these. They're not to be rushed ...

• All 7.5 billion of us exist on a speck of dust which is revolving around a slightly larger speck of dust at 67,000 miles an hour in an indefinable space without any control over our destiny. Your tiny little life is therefore not that important in the big scheme of things, however every single word you speak and action you take has an impact on others all around the globe, so choose what you say and do very carefully.

• Friends and Colleagues are important, Family is all. Resolve issues, don’t let them fester. If you have let them fester, resolve them today…there may not be a tomorrow.

• Eat what you like, when you like. Why would you eat what you don’t like, when you don’t want to?

• Exercise is healthy but then again so is sleeping, do as you feel – it’s your life and no one can alter that fact.

• We all make mistakes, and instead of learning from them, tend to repeat them despite the obvious pain they cause. The secret really is listening to yourself before you take action, consider options and probable outcomes wherever possible…..We tend to know how things will pan out.

• Be good, if you have the time, the skill or the financial means help with no expectation of return…it feels amazing for the giver just as much as the receiver….try it!

• On each of the 1500 times the average couple make love the man releases 500 million sperm, of which one will connect with one of the 2 million eggs that the woman was born with. That’s odds of 500,000,000 x 2,000,000 x 1,500 that you are here at all. You are very special – remember that!

• For you to exist and produce a specific child has odds of 500,000,000 x 2,000,000 x 1,500 x 500,000,000 x 2,000,000 x 1,500. Children are the most amazing, wondrous things, treat them with love, awe and light them the paths.

• Today is all that matters. Don’t forget the past, but don’t dwell on it, By all means make plans, but that’s all they are at this stage. Today is the day, today is your day!

• Slow down and admire the view. A journey gets you from A to B, it is the journey itself that takes time and therefore provides an opportunity to reflect and take stock.

• However you see yourself and whatever you think of yourself, it’s is a million light years away from how you portray yourself and how others see you. If you are brave enough ask!

• Everyone has fears and failings, everyone! From the top CEO to mega-rich sportsmen/women and rock stars. They are no better than you, in fact you may well be a better person than they are.

• Don’t have a dig at your boss, they may frustrate you, but they are generally trying their best in a difficult set of circumstances. Remember the emperor may be wearing new clothes, but the emperor is still the emperor, naked or not!

• Television is designed to dumb us down. Watching actors and actresses playing out fictional lives in soaps is to stop us thinking about and challenging our own.

• Break the rules wherever possible. If we all adhered and complied we as a race would not evolve. Challenge what you are told, break the mould, smash through the glass ceilings and if necessary kick down the statues.

• It’s good to have faith but keep it personal. Organised religion can be divisive, dangerous and thrives on the insecurities of us humans. King Zog of Albania may well have had it right!

• Karaoke’s should never be held in the same location more than once a year. The same people singing the same songs poorly each week is not what should be viewed as entertainment.

• People are generally a disappointment, but when someone comes up trumps, it’s worth the wait. Keep believing.

• One hour of glory may seem worth far more than a week of mediocrity but a week lasts 167 hours longer!

• Horror films are not good. They teach us that hatred and evil are acceptable and commonplace. If you need to stay in and watch a movie, choose Shawshank, Green Mile, Elf or It’s a Wonderful life.

• Musically the 60s were where it all began, the 70s where it happened and the 80s where it ended.

• Looks do attract, but it is what is inside that matters, go with the latter if you can’t have both.

• Don’t marry young, play the field, but sensibly and with respect. Learn to understand yourself and what you like and dislike before jumping in. Marriage is costly emotionally and financially so choose well.

• Believe. Believe in yourself, believe in your friends and family, believe in humanity, believe in something higher than all of us – they all exist and have limitless possibilities.

• Look for the good. Everything is made of positive and negative energy, there is bound therefore to be some bad news, but if we all recognise, talk up and celebrate the positive, amazing things happen.

• Be an agent for change. Everything happens with a first word, or first step be that person that initiates it, you have permission, there is nothing to stop you.

• Document the moment. Take a picture, write it down…in the years and months to come these records will make you feel alive, whether tears or laughter they will take you right back to the place and time.

• Tuck a little cash away every month and ensure you take family holidays while the kids are still young enough and still interested, these truly are golden moments.

• Communicate. Listen as well as talk, question and try to understand….in everything you do!

• Love. Love yourself, your parents, your children, your friends, your colleagues, even your enemies. John Lennon was right – Love really is all you need!

Payday or not Payday - don't give your money way. It makes no sense. No more!!!

*** FINAL THOUGHT OF THE DAY ***

Stuck at a loose end? When I have bit of time to spare I dive into the Diaries here on Gamcare. I'll settle on one and read it right through; it's especially great watching the gambling-free days clock up as I read through the entries... and also interesting to read when some of us relapse but get straight back on the saddle, stronger. There's some real inspiration here!

Tonight I've been reading Abstainer's diary (Give peace a chance). What a terrific chap! Abstainer's on Day 116 now, and I've found it fascinating reading his journey from Day 70 to date. There's terrific interaction with like-minded recoverers intermingled with Abstainer's diary entries, typifying the great spirit on here. A recommended read!

Incoming - Friday and the weekend. We're free of gambling - let's ensure we stay there; day to day 🙂

Thanks Mixer for your vote of confidence , great to receive praise it makes me feel good , probably unfounded but I like it anyway .

Personally I relish and enjoy the Guru Challenge , my goal now is 300 Days GF , I feel that is a serious amount of time .

Gurus always have mantras and I already have a few I've picked up in the diaries . Mantras are great for taking my mind off gambling when unwanted thoughts come along .

To me this thread is a good tonic for the blues , it feels energised with fun and enthusiasm . It suits my aim which is to stay positive , focussed and of course gamble free .

Keep smiling at troubles cos troubles are bubbles and bubbles will soon blow away .

Into the 16th day of full abstainence, still reeling from the lost business funds which will take months probably year's to sort. On a positive note have had funds available that I would of gambled but have kept in the business to cover expenses. I am very wary and know I need to keep my guard up as the longer I stay gamble free the more the mind will be telling me that a small amount on the slots won't hurt, £50 stake would turn into a £5000 loss. Looking forward to 30 days gamble free, and Striver status!!

*** WE'VE MOVED ! ***

As you'll have noticed, the Guru Challenge has moved home, at Gamcare's behest (fair enough) and now perched in the 'Overcoming Gambling' Section. I'm sure this Challenge and the legendary 2017 Challenges will make for good bedfellows!

I've also been alerted by Gamcare that some jokes I've posted might offend so they've been removed. Out of interest, the two jokes in question were told by the late, great Terry Wogan on his legendary BBC 2 Breakfast show. But I guess the world's moved on; it makes me feel a bit sad, but that's the way it is. I'll be posting no further jokes, but will retain a sense of humour - that's still allowed (thankfully). If I've truly offended you ....................... what can I say? Sorry.

Unbowed, back to what we're all about.

Abstainer - an absolute pleasure; sincerely enjoy your thread. amt722 - delighted you're on Day 16 and keeping mighty strong. Making positive strides to Striver - let's do this!

Weekend coming up - let's keep gambing free, one day at a time!

All the best, Mixer

I see the chicken made good it's escape 😉

No Joke's ????.......................... I'm intetrested in knowing how your brother pronounced his Hamster's name .?.............................. LoL :))

Stay safe Buddy :))

I wasn't offended by any of your jokes. When I joined here about 8 years ago it was a lot less strict than it is today it's a shame the forum admin have to police every post the office must be in North Korea? There seems a lot less encouragement for interaction these days. this thread and yourself will help more people than you will ever know

Keep up the good work people like yourself are hard to come by

ODAAT, Alan and Gems,

Thank you for your posts and the points you've raised. We live in very, very sensitive times, so I'm going to have to psychically transfer a response. Here it comes .... transmitting ... hope you've got it 🙂

Ok; back to being GF today ... time to concentrate on what really matters; this thread has had enough brickbats lately ..!

As a middle aged white english guy, they didnt hurt me. But as a parent with mixed raced kids ive seen how hurtful & nasty these so called innocent jokes can be when used to isolate someone because of the colour of their skin or their gender can become. Wasnt me who flagged it as offensive as ive never flagged anything except promotion of gambling

Ive been on building sites for 30 years & hear this ***** constantly. When will people understand its not funny its offensive.

Hi Dayatatime,

Thank you for gracing our thread with a visit. But, with the greatest of respect, you're going off-topic and its time to stop veering down a contentious course - you've just posted two agitating posts in a row. Please consider the tone of your posts and desist from the same.

I notice that you have been gambling-free for over 10 years, an amazing achievement. Thank you for visiting this thread and, hope you didn't mind me asking, do you have any tips or insight that might help us become gambling free?

Do you still find you have urges, or would you say you will never gamble again?

And, if you could offer one piece of advice, what would it be?

It would be a shame if, having given your time to visit our thread, we didn't ask you some Recovery-based questions.

I hope you understand me dragging this thread back on topic, dayatatime; and whilst some might disagree, I believe positivity to be a powerful attribute in our battle against this addiction. Again, any thoughts in this regard?

With the kindest regards, as always

Mixer

I fail to see contention or going off topic. You posted how your jokes had been removed on racist & sexist grounds, although i see you have now edited that post.

If i had a tip, it would be to concentrate on oneself rather than trying to control everyone else.
Stop talking about money & debt.
Start talking about how you feel.
Be fearlessly honest ( not mostly honest).

Do i get urges...no.
Am i cured? No. When i gamble im powerless.

Top tip. Reveal who you really are. Those who hide always fail.

Im not against this thread in any way. I think its good for newbies to band together. I also believe your intentions to be good. However, i think this thread is incredibably unhealthy for you. You obviously spend so much time trying to save others & be a hero it leaves no time to concentrate on your recovery. This is not a judhement as i have done the same thing many times in my years off gambling. Its so much easier to manage other people thsn look at ourselves.

Mixer, i truely see a good man in there, i just wish you could take time to make amends to yourself

Dear dayatatime,

Wow. As Vic Reeves once famously said: "You wouldn't let it lie."

I remember the last time I set up a challenge in these Forums, and I was the 'Marmite Man' then. Looks like I'm more polarised than ever. So much for the unconditional solidarity, the constructive support on these forums, the single-minded goal that we all seek. (I don't think "damning with faint praise" really counts...)

On the one hand, I could write a long counter-reply to your emotional, highly subjective arguments; it would be enviserating.

But on the other hand, I could simply ignore you altogether which is what I'm going to do. Sorry, dayatatime, not going to give you the 'oxygen'.

All the very best, Mixer

I know your well respected in the diaries day@atime and obviously have good insight into gambling addiction .

Why if you choose to preach to others do you include the wrongly spelt word '*****' in your critisism . Many people myself included find this both offensive and insulting .

Working on a building site doesn't really make this ok . I worked all my life in the merchant navy and than manual working with the council , I don't think this gives me the right to use thinly veiled foul language .

It's like men who eff & blind in a mixed sauna and wonder why there's no ladies about .