Well today has been rough...I am still 7 days gamble free but I still have slots in my mind..and by slots I mean online fruit machines. I still have dreams about that d**n deal or no deal slot game wanting to put a tenner in an account and have at it but then I remembered the pain I caused from my lack of control.
Hopefully one day these sick urges will go away because im just so sick of watching every penny I spend when it comes to grocery shopping or using the money that we do get for anything else productive. I also know that even if I do win..it all goes straight back into those greedy casinos pockets as I have the option to reverse any winnings I have ever withdrawn. And I always reverse to see if I can double my winnings and when that doesnt happen(which is 95% of the time) I would end up depositing more in the accounts. Which causes me even more debt then I had to begin with.
sorry about my crazy rambling I just got a bad case of withdrawels and one thing I can say is im glad I banned myself from the computer ( taking the plug out and giving it to my husband to hide) in case of any more future relapses
Hi GamAddict - hope the urges are receding today. You've hit the nail on the head when you describe trying to save pence on the grocery shopping - isn't it ridiculous when we were quite willing to see tens, even hundreds of pounds go down the Swannee. I think that's what brought it home to me - when I found myself meticulously adding up what I'd spent on the housekeeping, trying to use up coupons and discounts etc. when I had wasted so much on those stupid slots. Living in fantasy land, with no happy endings!
Keep going - you're doing fine.
Joanna
Pretty much hit it right on the nail..I truly think its astonishing how I was so willing to just keep depositing money into them d**n cssino accounts because at the time you dont notice how much those tenners or twentys add up until youre at the point where ur bank card is declined. And yet doing something productive like grocery shopping I would have to look at deals and set a tiny budget for food on the table..but im still going strong best wishes x
this is me all over cuttin back on shopping only putting enough money in the leccy meter to last but when it came down to the broadband bill that got paid as that was my life line i called it , must pay that as get cut off which happend a few times it felt like they was cutting my oxygen mask, no net meant no playtime, yet i also wouldnt think nothing about keep hitting the fund 20 fund 30 before you knew it it was 200 pooof gone and for what a few selfish hours ( my perspective what i call myself) im only on day 2 of not gambling but it is nice seeing other people out there that was/are thinking the same and had/have the same logic and experiences as me , i wish you well in your recovery x
Hi michdan,
Thank you for your wishes on my recovery, they are much appreciated. Yes its a shame really when it seems we count pennys for proper essentials like grocery shopping and dreading paying bills that seem like a waste of money when they are important in fact, but yet I was able to keep clicking on the deposit 20-50 like nothing on the online slots like it was monopoly money..quite ironic really but a lesson well learnt.
I wish you luck on your recovery as well since i know we are all in the same situation. I dont know if you are aware of the 2014 challenge Mr.B has set up in the overcoming problem gambling section thread but its a great way to keep your dedication of staying gamble free by writing down how you are feeling and all it requires is a post every week you should definitely check it out if you havnt already as it would do anyone who has a problem some good..its helped me out alot so therefor i'm happy to spread the word about it.
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
