Abstain and maintain.Stepping forward never back.

Would love to see his poem on here if he does write one, so true, lost days not hours.

Saw this when I was looking through e mails that had been sent to me and thought might make you smile, hope you have recovered fully from your dentical stint.

http://biertijd.com/mediaplay…emid=29327#.Tjn6_022E7A.email

xxx

morning diary.

well we all lost an hour, but today through this wonderful forum i see many are winning the war.

great for a fellas soul.

so the long days of light are with us again, let the sun come with it.

Off today, a family day, long walk with the dogs and lamb for dinner, thanks to that supermarket, every little helps lol!!

then a ruthless sorting out of the bookshelves !!!

books on books on books!!! lol. time to box some away to make way for the latest buys.

have a great day my gamcare family, a place i proud to belong, more than proud

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Hi Duncs

Just wanted to wish you a Happy Easter and to remind you that you are an inspiration to this site especially to those who struggle.

Have a good day and enjoy the lamb! - It's Beef and Yorkshire Pudding for me and my guests (now i'm gamble free)!!

Feb.

Hi Duncs,

You enjoy that lamb. For me, it's roasted turkey. The best part about it is that P does all of the cooking!! Onwards and Upwards eh? -joanxxx

morning diary.

Well first and foremost it is wonderful to see Smiler posting on the forum, his sound advice the day i came here gave me hope and a belief that there was help, a way to fight this addiction. for that i will be ever thankful and hope i can pass the message on to others in the same fashion.

I do see the forum as a sort of relay of sorts, torch bearers to welcome and show new members there lights guide.

for me it is a hugely forefilling thing to be a part of.

Well the lamb was fantastic, the walk even better,well apart from a poor choice in footwear on my behalf which led to me landing on my backside!! but a good five miles covered and the dogs came home and put themselves to bed!!!

we had a further clear out of junk, a bit of a spring clean, so a super productive day all round.

lazy morning today, waiting for that April fool to appear!!

one things for sure i won't be an April fool today!!

the money will be safely tucked in the bank.

No bet today, no odds will ever be worth risking what i have.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Stuffed with chocolate and been April fooling myself it is calorie free today.

Cooked dinner for family yesterday so resting today and deserve it as back on track with the help of yourself and everyone here.

xxx

Hey Duncs,

Glad you enjoyed your Easter. I look up to you as a leader of this crusade to get rid of the gambling demon. Thank-you for being the great person you are and giving such instrumental advice to all of us. For today Duncs you are stepping miles ahead!

Chicagoguy

Duncs

I am sorry for not being in a good place right now ...I flipped because I feel trapped by the weight of debt and the weight of the aftermath of this never seeming to end.

When I say I have no escape I mean none at all ...not a few hours drunk,not a few hours in front of a machine or to numb out ..my sleep is punctuated with night terrors also right now so I wake up feeling like I have done 10 rounds with Tyson and my mind is exhausted.

I know being a person in addcition is also a curse and that you also feel no escape ,but when I posted what I did I meant that I don't have any escape at all...not even an hour to numb out and I can't even afford to drink or go out even if I wanted to.

if people knew the circumstances of me getting in a relationship with my ex partner you would see how this was not just a case of meet,didn't work out ,get over it ,hasta manyana..there was so much at stake and I moved my entire life to be with that person.

Some days I am consumed with rage at the losses and I would have been over this a lot better and earlier if I were the person in addcition as I would only have my self to blame which to me I can live with as i would take the hit 100p c ..but I can't as it is due to another's actions that I had no control over that I am in this mess now .

I lost 40 k in a business venture in my 20 's ..I got over it as it was through my own niaviety and a learning curve and I was at a younger age to turn it around and start again.

This fiasco has affected not only my present but my whole future.

I am sorry but right now I am like a bear with a sore head.

X

Evening diary.

Days like today show me how fragile we can all be, our house is still in some parts made of cards, as i posted last week , Rach could have been the sort of good natured person i would not thought twice about using to fund my addiction, it was someone just like me who did. Through change i can see the hurt i caused through feeding my addiction. I learnt today a valuable lesson, that recovery comes at a different pace and with it alot of trash needs dumping.

Rather than adding to the trash for folks to folk through i will try to help off load it. I am not here to judge, i am here to recover too. That today i learn from.

Sad to see gambling took hold of castle again, great to see him back with new found resolve.

Me i hope it continues.

Duncs compulsive gambler no bet today

stepping forward never back.

Evening diary.

Well i have a few days off now, my mum is camping in her caravan a few miles from our home so we can enjoy a few days walking and relaxing.

Today i went back to the doctor regards all my tests i have had. A ten minutes appointment turned into 45 minutes boy did i get some mean stares when i left.

So the diagnosis. Cholesterol far to high circa 6.1, blood sugars far to high circa 3.0, blood pressure still to high so i have to diet for 4 weeks then start on statins and hopefully through diet i can stave off type two diabetes. All these things run through my family so looks like i have the same makeup.

Finally i am making headway with the knees!! Have to have x rays to see how worn out they are, due to standing all day and then the doctor will go through our options.

So six months in and i feel i am getting somewhere!!

In so much as my gambling took me to the brink, i will not be doing the same with my health, why would i?? I have invested far too much in myself to let my body fail on me.

So today i feel i start another fight, another focus.

No more dirty burgers, the skin from all the roasts and the black stuff can for now take a back seat.

My body is just for today my temple.

And i need it to serve me well for a good while yet!!

Duncs No bet today.

Stepping forward never back

Hey Duncs,

Sounds like you and me are on the same page. I started my program on Monday. It consists of a lot of fish and vegetables. Instead of using regular eggs, try egg beaters, don't know if you have them over there, but there cholesterol free and fat free. I use them for healthy omelets. I allowed gambling to take my health from me, and as a result I'am back on my type 2 diabetes meds and high blood pressure meds. I was telling my therapist that I couldn't get focused on my health till I surrendered to gambling and got professional help. I needed my mind to start to clear up from the mess gambling caused to it. Now I'am feeling very confident in my sobriety, and I'am ready to tackle my health issues. I'am also waiting on my blood work, which I'am not expecting it to be good but it's a baseline. I think a lot of people don't realize this addiction will take not only your money but your health. Let's do this Dunc, time to take it back! I wish you the best, and thanks for all your support.

Chicagoguy

Hi Duncs

Thank you for my post as always.

I Hope you get your health Sorted and feel better soon,

Chicago is right this not only takes your money

But also your health and what is as important as that? I've certainly felt it the last few weeks, think I've done with the relapse now and now looking forward on getting on that road to recovery again

I always no when I'm ready because I get

Positive and I am Sure positive about things after thinking through them tonight just no I can't live like this any longer, yes your right about the decorating that really helped me and you will be pleased to no I'm moving house in about a week so that will be alot of work plastering new skirting boards painting ect won't have time to get a urge (I hope) hehe

I now no posting and reading everyday helps posting every other week didn't take

Care Duncs speak soon Hollie x

Good to hear you are getting 'sorted'.

I am afraid my body is now 'the temple of doom' or am I thinking of a computer game.

Think I enjoyed the sixties too much and am paying the price now as bits wearing out by the day, just lucky nothing has fallen off yet, nothing important anyway.

Maybe we ought to start a weight watchers thread.

xxx

Hi Duncs,

Sounds like you and me are in the same boat with the elevated cholesterol and looming type 2 diabetes. I too was told that I have 6 months to clean up my act -- er and that was a couple of months back so make that 4. Anyway, I am looking forward to any low fat, low carb, recipes that you and Chicago can come up with. Anyway, today I choose not to gamble and will give a healthier lifestyle at least a thought or two. No promises there though. lol. -joanxxx

Hi duncs,

Glad to see your making some progress with the doctors, I know you will be as committed to your body's recovery as you have been to abstaining from gambling.

We are not the experts so follow the advice and get yourself back to fighting fitness again.

I to am still hobbling about on a very bruised and sore leg, walking woody is a mission in itself but he knows there is something wrong and even waits on the stairs for me and walks down slow at the side of me whilst I come down. , bless him.

Enjoy your time off and the walks with mum, those things are truly priceless.

Take care

Blondie