DaveUK - New Diary

Hi Dave.

Good to hear you're doing well. After a couple of heavy losses on the FOBTs last March I find myself 6 months down the line not having had a bet on anything !! I've been into bookies to pick up football coupons but as yet I've not been tempted by anything. Long may that continue.

As with many on here betting was an enjoyable diversion for me until FOBTs reared their ugly head. Since then my losses have ballooned and I've lost a lowish five figure sum, maybe £25,000, over recent years. ( if you can call it lowish of course )

I do still intend to bet on the odd football matches but I'n not straining at the leash to do so. I try to avoid betting on my own team winning .... especially when they play your lot ( lol ) !! If I stay off the FOBT and internet games slots betting I'm OK.

Obviously self exclusion was the key for you. I didn't know you had a brief fling with the internet. Dangerous territory indeed...

Self-exclusion from Day 1 sounds a ' no brainer ' doesn't it, but, as you found, it's initially very hard to do. I still haven't done it. Perhaps it's a combination of embarrassment/pride that makes us so reluctant. Whatever it is it's a huge boost to many compulsive gamblers who do so.

I'm glad you've put your ' small ' overall loss into perspective. In the grand scheme of things it really is nothing when you think of how many thousands flow through our hands in a lifetime. In that context small beer indeed.

You may recall I never did think you had a problem partly because of your hatred of losing and also being in control of every aspect of your life. I got some flak from others on here for saying that but I believe it to be true. That's not to say that might always be the case - others on here would testify to that - but I as pretty sure you'd be fine. As you say you're keeping your guard up and that's a wise decision.

I wish you all the best and maybe we can meet up one day ( is there a PM facility on here ? ), have a beer and discuss the meaning of life, the Universe, etc.

Blackjack

Blackjack my friend I hope you are ok. I am sorry for the long delay but didn't check my diary for a while.

FOBTs are very much in the past and I know think what the hell was I thinking. As we have said my losses were very small and I have proved it is possible to stop and stay stopped - I will never play the machines again of that I am certain.

How are you Blackjack? Will happily PM you but not sure how?

My objective has always been to keep away from the FOBTs and that I have done - it took self-exclusion but did the trick.

Its quite nice seeing bookies knowing I cannot go in - even if I wanted to, which I don't! I think some have expired as they were would only let me do a year but given that you have to opt in again its not a problem as I won't do that.

I had a recent dabble online with a proper dealer and proper table and got a couple of hundred or so pounds up but the greed in me kept going back for more and having £100 left I have closed the account and self-excluded - for life!!

I am continuing to save £20 a week which is my way of reproducing the amount I lost on the FOBTs (estimate £5000 over 8 years) and have now saved £2960 so well over half way there. I am actually going to keep going until I have £6500 for good measure. Its taken nearly 3 years to get this far and £2960 represents good progress.

I must admit I give the FOBT very little / no thought these days but without any doubt if I started playing again it would kick-start the whole problem again.

Here's to 2014 and 52 x £20 to add to the savings account. Ironically I used to try and win money but since I stopped the FOBTs I have never been better off!

I must admit I get a real kick out of self-excluding and was even better doing it having not lost overall.

When I asked (via online chat) the girl said 'may I ask why' and all I said was ' because I do'. She then said did I want to do it for just 6 months or forever and I said forever. She then treble checked I wanted to go ahead to which I said I most certainly did.

For anyone reading, if you have never done self-exclusion you should give it a go - it's great knowing they are mega ******* off losing a customer.

Definitely a win / win.

Another milestone - I have now saved back £3000 of the approximate £4-5K I lost over 8 or so years.

As recorded before I want to save £6.500 for good measure so am almost half-way there. It has taken just under 3 years and the money is just sitting there in an account which is what will continue to happen until the full £6,500 is in place after which its treats all round! Won't be treating any FOBT's though!

I so wish I could get the message across to the folks on here who keeping pumping money into the roulette machines!

I will keep encouraging but can't stop for them. I am so pleased I gave up - once the penny finally dropped that you simply can't win and I self-excluded I have never looked back.

Had a smile today as I thought about those days when prior to buying something of small value I would try and win it on the FOBT so it seemed like a free purchase.

Never worked as I either lost or if I did win would get greedy and try to win more then eventually lose it all (plus a load more from chasing what I had originally won lol).

Sometimes something which would have just cost a tenner ended up costing hundreds.

Cheers Bob - have just popped a note on your diary and you bet I will be saying well done.

A couple of weeks ago I was waiting in town to meet a friend and was close to one of the bookies I used to go into. A familiar face came out of the shop and said 'you going to try your luck'?' I just said ' Hi - nice to see you - I don't do it anymore'. Funny enough he didn't say 'your missing out' or anything complimentary about gambling. You know what he said.........'I don't blame you'.

The other thing that struck me the other day is that whenever I go out alone these days it never ever crosses my mind to sneak into a shop (where I have not self-excluded) to play the FOBT.

Spent time yesterday reading my GC posts back to 2006. So pleased I beat it in the end!

Username, password and a card's all I need

Then my online addiction I can feed

Nobody will know its just harmless fun

Surely there's easy cash to be won

It takes me off to a world of my own

In fact it's so much better when I am alone

One lucky spin and then I will run

Surely there's easy cash to be won

Offer of free bonus I'll have some of that

It's just like free money my account will be fat

All the Terms and conditions under the sun

Still sure there's easy cash to be won

The bonus is gone in no time at all

It's my money now, better not fall

In no time at all I have lost a ton

Starting to doubt there is cash to be won

Sneaking a play when people about

What you doing! 'Nothing' I shout

Flick on a new page disguise what I've done

Not seeming as if there's cash to be won

Chasing, increasing to get money back

But it's no use, Lady Luck I lack

Now badly in debt this is no fun

And all because I thought there was cash to be won

Lies, deceit I'm in really deep

A virtual world that now makes me weep

Give it up now what's done is done

Take it from me there's no cash to be won

I won because I gave up trying to win!

Even though i have lost a LOT of money , that is gone now and its not mine anymore it is now theres, and therefore i will have to let it go , bearing in mind the above which i think you also mentioned in your diary, i now say as you also have , I won beacause i gave up trying to win. which i think is very well said. also i want to now stick my fingers up to the gambling world which also you mentioned. you also said you would rather burn your money than give anymore to the casino/bookies ect... well i agree i now would also rather do that to , although this brings me to a thought i had the other day that i had before i read your diary , i was lying in bed thinking i need to make myself realise physically what i have done with all my money , thus thinking how could i do that , because what i did was online roulette and the problem with that was because apart from the odd occasion buying vouchers in a newsagents to put on the online site, i obviously used my card, well this is just numbers on a screen and to me it did not feel like i had lost money atall , and then thinking in bed i need to make myself realise what i have lost to push myself into stopping gambling , so i thought what i could do is burn some money , might sound mad but if its only a five pound note then how bad is that when one ive allready lost £43,000 and two if this makes me wake up and stop gambling then burning this five pound note will save me more money in the future by not gambling than the five pound note ive lost by burning, so im on day 9 and doing ok but what ive just mentioned lying in bed thinking about burning a five pound note the other day i forgot about it until ive just read your diary, well just after reading it i grabbed a five pound note that was lying on my bed grabbed a lighter went into the kitchen felt the note a few times then set fire to it and burnt it , now i defenatly dont think i will gamble again as because its made me realise when we gamble thats all we are doing just burning our money and thats what ive been doing when gambling just burning all my money , burning thousnds , but also its made it sink in how much ive lost , just thought i would share this with you as you seem to talk a lot of sense , thanks simon

Hi Tryer and thank you for adding to my diary.

It was quite a struggle but in the end I gave up the roulette machines 3 years ago and was really helped by self-exclusion more than anything.

Your thoughts are spot on - the money lost has gone. I kind of think, it was gambled and if I had won they would have gladly paid out but I didn't so part of the deal is they keep the money!

I tried absolutely everything to try and win but long-term could never ever do it. The only winner is the bookmaker.

When you gamble online or using your card in the bookies it just doesn't feel like real cash but as you have said it is very much cash and the stupidity has to be paid for.

It is as you say just burning money. I used to feed the machines and may as well been throwing the notes into a fire.

You have literally burned money - remember that image because every time you put your card details online, feed money into a machine or hand it over at the counter that's just what you are doing - burning money. You may get the odd win but will always lose more long-term.

Day 9 is very good and if you can do 9 days you can do everyday. To make it easy just say I will not gamble today when you wake up in the morning and if you stick to it then its job done and will give you a great feeling when you put the light out at night!

One thing to always remember is you will never stop being tempted because we are always tempted by things which give us a buzz. The trick is to accept you will be tempted now and again and put up barriers to fight it off when it comes along.

I really do wish you well.

Dave

Its now over 3 years since I self-excluded and the roulette machines are still no part of my life.

I have been saving 20 pounds a week since self-excluding over this 3 years so am now half-way to my target of 6.5K (which is much more than I lost over a 8/9 year period but once accumulated will be a decent amount to do something with).

I saw the lady who works in one of the bookies I used to go in (who knows I have self-excluded) and I was pleased to tell her I do not play them anymore. 'Don't blame you' she said, 'it's getting worse with people losing more and more'. Was sad to hear that but to be honest I can only control what I do,

I have tried to use this site to help others see the FOBT's for what they are but it just felt like a waste of time as people would be agreeing with the logic one minute but then complaining when they lost on them the next. I may change my opinion but for now have given up trying to convince people - they will no doubt realise once they have lost enough. Either rightly or wrongly I have concluded gamblers are a combination of greedy (no win is ever big enough), lazy (want to make money with no effort) and deluded (thinking there is a way to win and everyone else is wrong). Don't get me wrong I fitted into this category at the time.

I have had the odd play of the real wheel online and although it's no where near as dangerous to me as the machines used to be I just hate losing (even if its previous winnings) so have not bothered to keep playing.

All in all I very well positioned financially, no longer play the FOBT's, and provided I don't let my guard down should now be OK.

There are some encouraging signs that the government are realising how dangerous the FOBT's are - lets hope they turn words into actions and make them must less dangerous!