Yesterday my relationship of 5 yrs finished. A terrific girl who was smart beautiful and incredibly supportive. Unfortunately i had promised once too often that i had finished gambling, She glanced at an incriminating search on my phone and the truth came out. She is gone now, and i can't blame her, trying to imagine a long term future with a problem gambler is a troubling scenario. So I am by myself. I have signed up for treatment, to attend a gamblers anonymous session and started this diary. I am hopeful but also very afraid. The life i had built for the last 5 yrs has been destroyed by gambling, I worry that it will be a problem that i will always have. For the first time in my life i comprehend the gravity of my situation, what a tough road lies ahead. Trying to break patterns of behaviour and old habits such as going into bookies with the aim of gambling a single 20 pound note and coming out in a haze after having lost 300 pounds. Sitting here at 4am i try to think of any positives that gambling has been responsible for in my life and i struggle, why do i find it so hard to quit then?
I am going to do everything in my power to come to terms and address my situation. i owe it to myself,my girlfriend and my family. This is day 1.
Hi
Well done for coming here. You've recognised the problem now time to fix it. Be strong and fight the urge. Don't give in. In the long run you will be the winner. If you carry on gambling there is only going to be 1 winner. Look at self excluded all online accounts and if needs be self exclude any local shops or casinos. Keep the date written down of your last bet and each day look back and watch that number grow.
Try cancel out any crossings your going to have with gambling. Use the triangle.....
Location - money - time
Take one of them away and it's impossible. Keep yourself busy and occupied.
Head up, keep positive!
T
London
Welcome to the forum, a place full of like minded folk who share the same goal, to arrest that all important next punt, to put an end to the self created misery that is the compulsion to gamble.
There is a wealth of help and support out there, embrace it, give recovery as much effort as you did your gambling, it will have a profoundly positive effect on not only your own life but that of those you profess to hold dear.
The truth for me like many others is my life whilst gambling was built of cards, there was no solid foundations of which to build upon and eventually I was so detached from the world that they all came tumbling down.
Put as many blocks in place as you can, the triangle anon writes of has become a great tool in my own recovery, use the time to explore the reasons why you gambled and begin to work on eradicating them from your life.
Recovery is the one selfish act that I allow myself, because the profound effect it has is something that effects many other folk to boot.
I hope you use this amazing place to re education your mind as I have.
Most of all Enjoy it, addiction hates it when you seek support, isolation is one of its most powerful weapons.
You my friend are not alone.
Again welcome
Abstain and maintain
Duncs stepping forward never back.
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