DAY AT A TIME

I don't know if im doing this right. Administration asked me to start a new topic here on the recovery page. Am I doing this right?? I have a gambling addiction and I have not done any type of gambling for 19 days.

Hi tommy. Welcome to the forum and yep, you're doing it right. Looking forward to seeing more posts in your diary. All the best!

Thanks Martin for keeping me right.

Today is a bad day... All I can think about is doing a bet. I have been gambling free for 20 days and today has been the hardest day. Im so tempted to go to do a bet but I'm fighting myself not to. I really can't get it out of my head today

Hi Tommy, I was following your original post and your journey of telling your girlfriend etc. Don’t ruin it all now as you’ve done so well and should now start looking to the future and concentrating on the important things in life. I know you’ve said how much you love your girlfriend and that you want a future with her so that should be your focus. I can’t remember if you had gambling debts but if you have you need to accept that the money is gone. If you chase it like I did it will turn into a large sum of money that you can’t control anymore and therefore your dream on a house will be over. Not gambling is the answer and the only way you can have a happy life. I’m 68 days GF and struggle to let the debts go but by registering with GAMSTOP I now have the peace of mind that I can’t sign up to sites online. Good luck with your battle and 20 days is a great achievement so far. Don’t let this addiction ruin your life.

I hope you've managed to keep it at arms length Tommy.

I know that feeling of not being able to get it out of your head. Thankfully for me I don't get like that these days, but I used to. And to be honest I could probably count on one hand the number of times I've been able to fight off an urge.

I remember once experiencing what you describe, it was a Saturday about 2.30pm. I'd been fighting with myself all day go to the bookies/dont go to the bookies. Well I finally succumbed to it but I couldnt find one of my shoes, only had one pair. I was getting into a right panic, sweating, shaking and ransacking my bedsit looking for the missing shoe.

I sat down on the side of my bed and asked myself why I was being so pathetic, what was the worst possible thing that could happen if I didn't get my bet on, would my head explode? Would my legs fall off? Struck down by a bolt of lightenning perhaps or maybe spontaniousley combust? No of course not the worst thing that could happen if I didn't get my bets on is, I might miss a big win.

I changed my mind, (and immediatley found my shoe). Like most compulsive gamblers who use this site for support, I've had big wins before.........what good has that ever done anyone of us? We're all here, further more we're all here because gambling had taken over, we were powerless against it, our lives had become unmanagable because of it.

I decided that day that even if I did miss a big win, the consequences were always going to be a lot worse if I went to the bookies. Wish I could say I havnt gambled since, sadly I have

However Tommy after 35 years of the same old pathetic behaviour I am now about 18 months without any gambling whatsoever.

I hope its day 21 for you tomorrow and not day 1. I dont believe that "slips" are inevatable they are not an obligotary part of recovery, but I'm also painfully aware of how difficult it is at first to truly believe that we have a choice, and that we can change our ways.

At the end of the day Tommy, theres nobody there dragging you (or me) in.

I havn't read your full thread mate, but I give you full credit for coming here and posting your feelings today. Whatever else has transpired today, you should be immensly proud of youself for coming here looking for support when you felt like that.

I wish that I'd seen your post earlier.

Take care, keep posting what ever is going on for you.

Thanks so much... That means a lot. I'm glad to say I fought the urge and I didn't gamble. Day 23....im going to beat this. FOR GOOD.

Hi I'm going on my 3rd councillor session tonight and I'm actually looking forward to it. Iv so much to tell her. Can I ask if anyone has went to 1 and how many sessions you had to do??? She has recommended 6 sessions to me and it's very expensive but I don't want to stop before I have to.

25 days today gambling free and to be honest I don't miss it. The last 6 months I was gambling I didn't even enjoy it. I was only doing it to try and get the big win to pay my debts off but I kept digging myself in deeper. The odd day I really feel like betting but then I come on here and read my posts and it takes me back down to earth.

Good Man Tommy,

It is easy to fall out of contact when the days start adding up, as many of us have learnt through experience.

It's no suprise you have the odd day when you feel like betting, you had done it almost every day for months, apart from the complexities of addiction, you had created a habit where gambling was beginning to become the "norm". for you, it was what you done.

Now you don't and it does take a lot of getting used to.

Keep sticking with it mate, Rome wasn't built in a day.

Brilliant thanks so much for your advice. Coming on here everyday really helps me at the moment as I'm still in early stages. I'm learning so much about gambling addiction everyday now and I can see the signs that other people have a problem. I definitely think a few people I know have a problem. I can tell as I was like that. Do you know what I mean??

Good going TommyB!

re counselling sessions. Whist everyone is different 6 weekly sessions in early days does seem to be common. I'm 5 sessions into 6 session block with Gamcare.

Also, my wife had counselling in past for another reason and had 6 sessions.

Hope that helps.

Do you think it helps you???

The only thing wanting me to gamble is the pressure of paying my debts.... I feel like it's never going to end. I feel like I'm never going to be debt free. Why can't life be simple.