Deep breath and start again

Great post Annie. ..totally get what your saying...I remember going years without buying myself any clothes through choice. ..just what I literally had to in order to not get arrested for indecent exposure ! Lol
Now I've got a wardrobe crammed with clothes....because I can...and because I want to...
I wear make up again....when actually looking back I even let that slip. ...my pride is back !
Have a wonderfull time on your night out....you'll feel like a million dollars....
Well done on your gamble free days....xx

Day 71 in the diary room. Still no gambling...well, even if I wanted I am unable to.

My wages go straight into the joint account and I my own account is the one my Step Change payment comes from. I have binned the card for that one as it has taken me years to get into proper recovery and address my debts. Payments are coming off, I have no urge to gamble, I have less money in my pocket but, weirdly, I feel empowered?? It's an odd feeling but one I can get used to.

I've always worked and done extra shifts and have never really been short of money until the past few years, but even then I was using credit cards and basically not paying attention to the price of things such as my shopping! I did go short when it came to spending on me as my money was for gambling. I am now comparing prices for shopping and looking around for good deals and quite enjoying myself, to be fair!! As a family we have lots of time together, just chatting, watching TV and I feel a bit guilty that for a while in my life I forgot what was most precious to me. I am truly happy. I have enough money to get by with and I am starting to think what I will do with my money when my plan is finished in 3 years time.

Best wishes to my fellow CG's. It has taken me a long time to get to the point where I feel content. I truly hope you stick with your plans and call for help when you are struggling. Get those blocks in place and don't do it half ar5ed like me for long anough. Take care all xx

Afternoon annie , just wanted to say a big thank you for your kind words and support and it's nice to hear from you again and read that your doing so well , it's funny but we spend so many years thinking gambling will make life easier and bring us wealth but really all the time we had what we needed already .

Take care my love and I'll speak to you soon xx

Hey Annie
Thanks for stopping by
Great to hear your going along nicely....well done you
Have a chillaxing weekend with the family x

Hi diary and diary readers. I'm 88 days in and gambling cannot be further from my mind. I will not get complacent as the urge has bitten me on the a**e more times than I dare to remember. However, this time is so different. This is the first time I have completely committed myself to recovery by robustly putting the measures in place to prevent me gambling - the triangle - and it works.

I am now watching every penny I spend and once a month I deposit a large sum of money to StepChange to deal with my debt. I have chosen not to pay direct debit but rather pay the money in myself and watching my hard earned money disappear in the blink of an eye is a reminder of how much of a ridiculous situation I got myself into and strengthens my resolve never to get into that place again. When I think of how understanding and caring my husband was, it makes me think why I was scared to tell him the extent of my addiction and putting it off led to many years more gambling and accruing more debt. However, it is what it is and we're dealing with it, together, like a wee team.

For those who have not yet told their partners/family, think about how it will change things - no more sneaking about, no more sleepless nights, no more 5hitting yourself when the postie comes and running like a madman trying to get the post before anyone else. I understand not every relationship is the same, so perhaps consider some counselling first and put up the barriers to show your significant other that you are serious about tackling your addiction. Start a diary, even if no-one reads it, get it all out there FOR YOU. I wish all the very best on their road of recovery xx

100 days gamble free! Completely new me. After many slips ups over the past few years I can honestly say this is the most positive I have felt about a gamble free future. Mind you having no access to online gambling and no cash helps greatly!! This is the first time I've truly and robustly incorporated the triangle into my recovery and it has helped me immensely - I no longer have the urges which used to take over my life. It had been a struggle but more than worth it. Roll on the next 100 days.

Well done annie x

Well done on the 100 days Annie.

you should be very proud of yourself.....no stopping now though xx

Hey Annie...
Woopy doooo to you....
Massive well done on the 100 days.....sorry it's a day late...so well done on 101 as well ....xx

150 days, woohoo! Loving life, no thoughts of hitting the online slots. I now have full access to our money and the full trust of my lovely husband. StepChange up and running and getting a few extra shifts for a wee bit extra cash as, although it's great to be dealing with my debt, things are a bit tight.
Onwards and upwards there is now light at the end of the tunnel.
Keep up the good work friends, we can get there with the barriers up high!

Nice one Annie! Twit twoo.

x

Nice one Annie x

Woop wooooooop nice one Annie any chance of a tea it's getting cold out here xx

Jeeez
Nearly missed the day ..
Well done lovely lady xx

These gambling companies are a bunch of cheeky barstewards! Got this today:

We’ve noticed that you haven't played for a while and wanted to remind you that you’ve still got a cash balance on your *****account.

Simply log in with your email address and password to Get On: vultures.com

In two weeks, your account will have been inactive for 12 months and this means the dormant account fee kicks in as outlined in the T&C’ below:

16.3 We reserve the right to apply a dormant account charge to any account that is left inactive for 12 plus months. This charge is an administration fee applied to all dormant accounts with a positive balance. A dormant account is an account that has had no deposits, withdrawals or bets placed within the last 12 months. A fee of £5 or 5% of the account balance (whichever is greater) will be deducted from your balance per month. Your account can be reactivated at any point by making a deposit, withdrawal or a bet.

There’s no need to worry just yet, though - there’s still time to reactivate your account.

Our customer service department is here from 8am – midnight daily should you need any further assistance.

My reply:

I am self excluded due to gambling problems and therefore I am unable to re-activate my account. Quite truthfully I find this email upsetting and insensitive. Thankfully I am addressing my gambling problems and have no urges to gamble - however this has not always been the case - and a letter like this would be an invitation to gamble again if I was not in the right frame of mind.
I would suggest you donate any monies to a charity which supports those with gambling problems. However, having dealt with companies like yours for more years than I care to remember I doubt that would ever happen would ever happen.

I feel empowered and ready to take on the world!

Tea's up Deano xx