Diary 1st entry, Repeatedly letting down everyone who has supported me.....one day ill lose everything

Please give us an update regarding your progress. I hope you are still on the gamble-free path to recovery!

Alright guys

Thanks for the posts

Yes still gamble free.

Bought my gf and i a weekend trip away for February at the start of the weekend as a surprise for our anniversary.

It was great to see her so happy.

It leaves me mucho skinto for the month ahead in reality but the moneys gone to a good cause and cant be blown.

Financially everything is starting to come together now. Being excluded from the places i used to play fruit and slot machines has made all the difference.

Ive had 50 in my wallet for 2 weeks now, theres only about 5 of it left now but its all just been spent on normal things and i havent even considered gambling it.

Hadnt really been thinking about it until the other day how remarkable it is that ive had that amount of money in my wallet without wanting to gamble it. lol

Just counting down the days until my golf holiday to portugal in September!!!

Your holiday to Portugal sounds fantastic! A really good thing to look forward to. If you do not like counting the gamble-free days, then why not do a countdown to your holiday? Keep up the good work!

How is it going? I trust you are still gamble-free and that you have not had a relapse. I hope you manage to pay off your Wonga loan before the interest payments start to bite.

Hi pelle

First off congrats on 70 days!!

Yes I'm still going strong! I'm not posting everyday because when I did I was then thinking about gambling everyday and I didn't want that so I post every few days and spend my days thinking about other things

I was out at the weekend with my gf and our friends for a meal. It was great to sit and have great fun not worrying about gambling problems

My wonga loan is down to 250 and I'm trying to get a way to clear the rest so I can get it away and pay back the money to a friend or something interest free

I'm not worrying about it though its not a huge amount of money and it will get paid off eventually

I for paid on Tuesday and put 550 away in our joint savings account for a house, we have 2k in it and that was my first contribution which felt great, I'll be making that payment every month

I still read diaries on here but I agree that people come post and delete and start again and it's impossible to keep track. I've posted on about 10 diaries that I never found again or heard from so I just keep track of the people who were always around, good on those people

Also thanks to lucky Jim for his post as well, thanks for taking the time to read my diary

Good luck everyone

Did you know that luckyjim used to be mm?

I wrote on Pat's diary why I had to change.

Keep strong

Ohhhhhhh hi mm!!

Lol that makes more sense now! Great to hear from you skipper 🙂

Regarding posts that cannot be deleted, it just makes me wonder whether they are left there for research purposes.

Or for certain gambling bosses to have a sit down in their expensive boardroom with their silver crusted notebooks and expensive laptops and decide on the next strategy to take money away from us.

Sorry "mates" but it won't work!

Anyway back to you!

Your recent events just shows what life is life when we don't gamble.

So why gamble?!

Food for thought for today...!

Enjoy your evening.

GT

Hi GT

Thanks for your post, it's much appreciated! Interesting thought about gambling bosses spying on a site like this for how to break people!!

Life's just moseying on for me at the minute, it's January which is a boring month, I just live for the weekend so I can play golf, that and see my gf is all I really want to do with my time, lol, no motivation for work since the turn of the year

I'm sure it'll return as the months move on but right now I wish I could take retirement at 29 and play golf for a living......sure we can all dream!

No gambling, haven't had to think about debts etc which is nice. The online poker is long in the past these days, been years ago now, the fact that I've barred myself from the fruit machines were I usually played has made all the difference! No temptation and no chance to spend every penny in my wallet

I don't miss it, it was just do hard to break the routine but it's done now and I'm happy for it

There's one part of gambling I miss though, it's the one part that cost me no money and that's live poker, whether it was down at the local poker club or at friends houses with beers and snacks

I can openly admit I lost thousands at online poker, I've lost ten of thousands on fruit machines. However I never lost any money playong live poker. With the boys it was always a tenner in a tenner 2 rebuys max

They were good days, we had a good group, the banter was high and we had so much fun, and I won 9 times out of ten, I never had to stake anymore than £30 so it was low risk

At the poker club I played £40 freeze out tournaments, no rebuys, when your out your out. I only went about 10-12 times, I made a few thousand, I was good and I was patient, I enjoyed the challenge but only went every month or so

Gambling generally has taken alot from me and I look back at it with mostly scorn but those poker days I look back and smile. It was fun and we all were a team.

Those days are gone now, we all have busy lives, responsibilities and the club no longer exists. Maybe one day I'll get the chance to play again, I know I'd love to, poker challenges my brain but online was too much like monopoly money, but the real thing was great

Anyways I'm not writing this for approval or criticism I've just been thinking how much fun we all had back then as students, life's different now

Maybe one day when I have my own house I can invite the boys round and we can play like the olden days

Maybe one day

I hope you are still going strong and enjoying life away from gambling.

Hey Pelle

Yes indeedy, just clocked off work, looking forward to a weekend spending time with my gf, time on the golf course and watching Spurs beat Man City!!

Excluding myself from playing the fruit machines I used to play was the best thing I've ever done

Knowing I can't go in there just takes away the temptation and as a result I have money in my wallet on a daily basis!

How's your weekend looking?

You are so right, life is so much better when gambling is not part of it.

So why gamble?!

GT

Hi N,

Its took me all morning on and off coming to read a bit at a time till I got through your diary from the very start. I am so happy for you that you now seem to be in a place of content, taking each day as it comes and giving yourself something to look forward to. Think counting days and posting everyday does maybe put a bit of pressure on. I started a week ago and came on here had said I would do diary the next day but I'm still working on it in a word document lol.

I got to the bit with your first lapse and had a wee in ma eye tear for you, reading on though I think anyone could see how determined you were to get as far along as you have now.

I hope you have a nice time with g/f for anniversary break treat and your golf holiday sounds like it will be good.

Hope you keep going and look forward to reading your updates now I have seen your story from the beginning.

Best wishes JML x

"The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket".

Are you still living a gamble-free life? Please keep us updated.

Hey guys

Sorry it's been a while, long story short I had a brilliant weekend away with my gd at a nice hotel last weekend, it was amazing

Yesterday I fell off the wagon and lost£1200

Now I'm ruined

I have a 4 page letter to my dad explains the last 3 years to him since I told him last. I have used 700 of customer money as part of that 1200

The bad thing is if this had never happened I wouldn't be about to come clean

I'm about to severely damage one of the 4 important relationships in my life

If I didn't enjoy so many things in my life is have killed myself long before now, I can't keep having these heart wrenching moments every year

Sorry everyone