Hi everyone! day 2 today!
I've been checking into gamcare since Februaru this year and my gambling has taken some serious hits! I'm now starting all over again, this time reflecting on my own life through my gambling diary.
This time I'm looking for that long goal of May. That's when my new baby is born. I must sort myself out by then.
Currently I'm starting this diary with £3500 on credit card and £3500 overdrawn. I will be keeping you updated on my bank balance through my recovery. This is also a big motivation for me.
Hope you get inspirTion from my journey and hope any newcomers can read my thoughts through my journey.
Morning German... I too start recovery in Feb this year but I'm on day 16 due to numerous relapses. Fortunately I've reduced my debts on credit card and overdraft since Feb but not got rid of them as I should have. Hope you stick to it this time and can bring a new life into your family without the stench of gambling spoiling things. Good luck.
Well done on starting this diary and not giving up on giving up.
Look forward to reading your posts
Suzanne xx
The German.
Fella again welcome, my advice is don't get too hung up on your bank balance, addiction will happily lay dormant until it looks healthy again, then it will re enter your mind with talk of how it's justified that gambling is again an option.
We all active live by the same mantra
I CANNOT WIN BECAUSE I CANNOT STOP.
Why do you gamble?
Escapism was my reason, today I want to face what life throws my way, the good and bad.
Arresting that next punt will gift you ceaseless opportunity.
Take it fella, most of all don't treat it like a punishment, enjoy it.
Abstain and maintain.
Duncs stepping forward never back.
Thank you Duncs!!! Wise words!
I get bored, I sit on my phone a lot, but I'm fed up of new companies popping up and making it easier for me to begin new gambling adventures. Self excluded from 25 plus!!!
If only I could put my name and address into a database and it would block me from old and new accounts!! These companies need to help addicts more! Another day ad counting!
Day 5. I had thoughts of gambling last night with games on. I shrugged them off and watched tv instead. 76 days till christmas. I must start 2016 clean!!!
Another day! End of a weekend. Feeling like c**P. Overdrawn and in debt! That is all.
Stay strong pal. It can be hard but keep thinking how guilt free your mind is just now, then think how guilty you would feel if you have that bet. Life is a lot better without gambling do you not think!
Peace
Lennyd
Overdrawn and in debt but at least you don't owe anymore than you did , and here's the biggy , Your pride's still intact !!! Keep it going German , youre doing great !!! Alan
Today I have had a new lease of life. It is 226 til my 2nd child is born. So I will be doing my countdown and not count up! Let's hope it has a positive psychological effect on me. Basically no betting until the end of the season at least!!! 226 to go!!!!
Wow been a long time since I updated. Went in different directions these last few weeks, trying to find myself....,today I'm laying in on the table.
Gambling addiction has led me to £5000 overdrawn, £15000 loan, £3600 credit card. Ouch.
All good here! My countdown is still on.
Had a mad thought, I'm doing an extra job tonight for £100, lots of responsibility......
Yet as a gambler I would blow 100 quid with one bet of halftime result or something! I hate thinking about it.
Been listening to hypnotherapy on YouTube.....they are good. It's almost as if my brain is blocking me thinking about gambling for most of the time. Strange!!!!
Anyway, just getting my thoughts on paper!! Thank you for reading
Went to withdraw cash....you have insufficient funds!!! Uh oh!! I'm f****d. That feeling of emptiness from all the past stupidity sinks in. Not a penny to my name!
Wow, feel horrible reading this! try and stay strong mate, positive thinking!
I have an idea? why not have a pot or an account and everytime you feel the urge to gamble think of your children and put the money into an account called the 'the holiday fun' or anything else you enjoy doing and put it in there for you and your family to go disneyland! end rewards will be epic.
Thanks Lewis! Much appreciated feedback. I have got a little pot of money going. Luckily my second job has meant I have cash this week.
It's 188 to go! Feeling good this week. Skint but good!!! I need to get through this weekend! No online gambling!!!!!!!!!!
I need to listen to another hypnosis tape!
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