Don't Turn Around

Congratulations on 75 Days GF. Thankyou for the song recommendation (Dancing Girl by Terry Callier 1972) but the link came up as "Video not available". The song is however available by Aaron Jerome (2008) and that is very good.

I went to see Terry Callier at Beverley Minster about 8 years ago and thoroughly enjoyed his music. After the performance I bought his CD 'Timepeace' so I've just been having a listen to it. I was a bit taken aback earlier to read he had died in 2012 aged 67, it strikes a chord a bit cos i'm 67.

Happy Hawaii Smashed!

Espero que tengas un buen 50th cumpleanos.

Had mine a couple of years ago. No big party just a few special things. A spin in an Aston Martin, a T-bone steak and an Emerates Stadium Tour, but that was everything I wanted.

Thanks changemylife as always.

Got today off recovering from a Hangover Pt4 type night a nice evening with your best friends the one you count on your one hand, a night that was full of mad memories. When to a restaurant and tried things I had never tried in my life mussles, sone other stuff was amazing I will remember the big 50. My daughter had saved £110 so she could buy me some trainers I was flabbergasted and the card was priceless and she done a post on Facebook that was humbling and amazing. I am lucky as we get older we play up and act on s**t that don't count. I was gripped badly by a horrible addiction it tried drain my life force made me doubt myself and blame others for my actions, I am lucky to be out as their is a lot of life in this old dog. Thanks for all your support it is priceless. My video for today is obout escaping the machine which is my future quest.
https://youtu.be/2fgEK-Ksis4

Sounds like you had an amazing night! Living, laughing, having fun with the best of friends. And your daughters generosity and thoughtful gestures are priceless.

Yes maybe life does begin at 50. A time in our lives when we've still got some vibrance and energy. When we get propelled towards our dreams and desires.

Time first to recover from the hangover though eh? All the best Smashed. Keep on going for it - whilst leaving the gambling behind.

Gambling is all over BBC Breakfast today as the FOBT argument does it's rounds again, I watched it all and only heard online mentioned in a couple of sentances. They run the same dated videos of terminals, they dont even look like that anymore, poor research, poor images, and the same old presenter walking down the very same road in North London talking the same old tune with a few words changed from the last time. The online beast contines to laugh like Christopher Lee at the end of Thriller.

Fine analogy my friend. The outside world of 'normality' looking in on gambling like a kind of worrying state of chaos.

I can hear Christopher Lee's crazy laugh in my head right now.

Hope everyone is good. The counter today ticks over to 80 days. If I was Phileas Fogg I could have travelled around the world in that time but I have abstained from gambling which is also an achievement. Probably travelling around the world is easier and obviously a lot more fun. A lot of folks have joined lately with similar stories lately of thinking there in control and then slipping into thousands lost. I think the new games getting released must really be tapping into the addictive mind, and getting people unknowingly hooked. People chasing what they have seen on YouTube and there is a video last week of a guy R********a spinning £18,000 roulette spins, that is insane. They said yesterday that if you have a problem with gambling you are not addicted, well what's the difference?

80 days is a bloody good spin mate. The gambling industry is always there. It's not our job to defeat it!

You can make the right decisions to create a better life. Go for it!

Congratulations Smashed on 80 Days GF ..... stephen

Thanks lads, I think the first of the month hits hardest at the moment still as its the day the gambling crime DD leaves the account, I should look at it as another one gone, or go to the top of a quiet hill and shout a few swear words, let it out and then move on with the rest of the month, and your right changemylife looking at what government and gambling industries do and snarling about it makes no difference, we have to keep all our focus on not being suckered back in as the hooks are everywhere, if something makes money be it gambling or any of the unfair taxes and fines councils and government dish out you have to play the game as wrong as it may be to us. Another day of a gamble free life.

Hi smashed

Thanks for your posts to me. I keep doing the same action expecting different outcome, It's maddness. Pure self destruction.

I haven't got much to say. You seem to do the right things taking it one day at a time and fighting the good fight. Things will get better, there are a lot of lessons about our behaviour to be learned, you're on the right track on the journey to becoming a better man.

Stay safe, stay commited, reap the benefits recovery offers.

X

Good Morning

Day85.

I like my 5's and 0's my new form of Gambling is not Gambling counting the days to where one day it will have nothing on me, I will owe it nothing it has no holds over me, and temptation to come back will never exist in my mindset. I would type how long is 5 years in days (1825) when I first stopped as if I stayed in my current job that is how long the gambling debt would take to repay. I now believe I will pay it off quicker than that with a new job or working for myself but I'm very focused on that at the moment. I am not hypnotised by Gambling anymore and like others have said I screw my face at Gambling adverts, and sneer as I drive past betting shops. It will never go away but 85 days since the 13th of August I am still winning, roll on 100.

89 Days
I am still counting as for now it can still feel like I'm running away from it but it's still keeping up with me and knows when to pull up alongside and pull back my day count to zero.
Still not made any dents into the job change yet, but a few knock backs and despondency sets in, your mundane mind telling you to stick with what you have, your to old to be trying to move on, but your positive mind keep telling you to push harder, if it was only as easy as just containing the Gambling Mind eh. Just have to get those wheels moving a little bit and not expect to speed off. This week has felt like Groundhog Day, I know only I can change it and must try harder.

Well done smashed 11 days til 100,keep it going and keep that gambling devil off your shoulder.

Hi Smashed thanks for posting on my diary, have given myself a mental slap and am climbing out of my self pity. I think we are experiencing the same groundhog day feelings. But as you say as individuals we are the only ones that can change things. Also I am really impatient but things don't happen in a flash. Best of luck with finding a direction career wise and have a good GF weekend take care S:)