HARMONY !

Shiny..of there's one thing I'm amazing at ..it's being selfish in a good way.

Do what you want..end of.

You have spent enough time people pleasing ,placating, being a PA ....stay home.

Self respect involves casualties...you cannot get well and continue to people please, the 2 are incompatible.

Folks are just going to have to deal with it themselves as it is no longer your job to sacrifice your life for the greater good.

If people have a gob on about it then they will have to just get over it..

Netflix rules ..OK? ..any room on your couch??? :-)))

R and D xx

...lol...always in your corner Hun...xxx

Tyson xxx

Hey shiny pants,

Hears to a stress free, guilt free Christmas Day on the sofa with a curry watching greys anatomy or breaking bad, I still haven't watched it .... Supposed to be brilliant....

Take care oh shiny one..

Sending ((((((((. Xxx)))))))))). Lots of them your way

Blondie xxxxxxxx

Hey Shiny,

Oh..you made me laugh.. 🙂

I said the phrase " Apply for my position if you like "...

Some people just out of control, and my technique with keeping hands behind my back was suggested by my top manager ( couse i can be a little stress head lol ) and it did work last night !!! Even managed to get a little smile out in a middle of the argument..lol ....live and learn...

Wishing you Merry Xmas Hun if won't catch you later xx

keep candy crashing on tough days and carry on on the road you are doing so well at !!! 🙂

Hugs ((((( Shiny pants ))))))))

P.s. not sure where "pants" coming from...but seen others happily putting it down...joined the group lol lol x

Yo,

So there's me finding after many a long year some or really rather a lot of contentment in my life .

Coping with the stresses that life's throws at you , potting around my little house . Loving the calmness , and convinced that the pease and order were for me the medicine I needed to keep my addictions in check .

My youngest comes back from uni , and with it my utopia is temp disrupted . But hay it's only till the 11/1 , so I can get through it . Count down the days until my new found serenity is restored .

But no , my youngest has decided that she will leave the uni she is in . Cos she soooooo very unhappy and apply to start at the local uni in Sept .

So mother dear , she says if I live with you for four months ( I gulp ) save up the deposit for a bedsit and move there.

Really !!!!!!!!!

In the meantime I live on a knifes edge . Her behaviour is very extreme , the drugs , the less than desirable friends. And at the end of the day will she ever save the money for a flat , or even get one with a credit history which has seen her default and default time and time again.

I feel backed into a corner . So I have told her no .

I have spoken to her dad and we will see if we can raise the deposit . That is if she even gets a place .

I told her I do not want to live with her , her reply was I do not want to live with you either . Well f***f comes to mind .

I refuse to go back to the life I had , I refuse to put my recovery in jeopardy , because my soon to be 21 year old daughter throws in towel as soon as life does not go her way .

What's important now , is that I do not obsess about this, let it turn on the brain churning washing machine thoughts that take over my whole being .

Have I moved forward enough to manage that .....

Time will tell ............

Shiny xxx

Hey Shiny,

I hear you darling!! Don't let it affect your recovery, you come too far to turn back.

Life can be challenging ( you are know that well sweetie) but you are stronger than before.

I can't comment about your daughters issues, not my place to do so, just hope that it will come to her sooner or later. Friends comes and go and i hope "not very desirable" friends wil leave the circle quicker and more decent ones will come in.

Feel your anger, frustration and uncomfortable position to be in...but you are strong lady, don't let this s**t affect you. It will work out the way you want it to be.

((((((((( Shiny ))))))))))

S x

P.s. keep posting sweetie...get it all down xx

Hi Shiny.... interesting to read about your family dynamics. Gets me thinking about my own relationship with my mum. It must be so hard to know what to do for the best. But as you say, when all is said and done, your daughter is an adult now and she needs to learn by her own decisions and mistakes and live with it.

The relationship with my mum is good now but a few years ago she must have been pulling her hair out with frustration with what I was doing to myself. Having said that she still did the right thing for herself and her own life. She continued to enjoy her retirement regardless which was very much the right thing to do.

If she'd lived her life through my addiction then she's probably of had a nervous breakdown. A few years ago she said to me "if you gambling until you are hungry and homeless I would feel sad, but it would have been your decision, it would have been your choice" That was something of a wake up call for me.

Interestingly when I worked on the other side of the fence as an advisor I more or less counselled mums of addicted gamblers who were very much shadowing the trials and tribulations of their addicted son or daughter and falling apart in the process.

Anyway ive rambled on a bit. Great stuff on your own recovery. Warm regards... S.A 🙂

Hiya shiny

So proud of you the way you have dealt with this last year, I hope you have a great xmas and can see you having a fantastic 2014 thanks for all your support this year

Castle2

Hey Shiny,

Time has come...lol 🙂

Wishing you very Merry Xmas sweetheart, you achieved so much this year and i wish you so much more over next year!!

You are great inspiration and i am very thankful for all your support and understanding. Always close by in my thoughts and i wish you all the best darling.

Peace, happiness and belief are coming your way Shiny, don't have to look for them far....they are always within your spirit and heart 🙂

Sandra xxxx

Hi Shiny,

For what it's worth in my humble opinion: You did the right thing by your girl. She has to grow up some time. And, as for you: I hope you have yourself that "merry little Christmas" on your sofa, feet properly put up, rightfully savoring that wonderful curry. -joanxxxxx

Hey oh Shiny One... just popping in to wish you a Merry Christmas..whilst I am merry... and a Happy New Year.

Hope all goes as well as it can next year.

Jon x

Hey Shiny,

Hope that Santa was good to you and you had a lovely Christmas.

I haven't been posting much on other diaries but just wanted to mention that you were lovely as always after my recent relapse and I appreciated the kick up the backside when feeling sorry for myself.

Alexis5Y20K posted on my diary last night after being away for over a year. I am sure you will remember him. A lovely person. He has updated his diary today. Nice to see an old friend back on the scene.

Tomso.

Shiny

Happy new year and sending you best wishes for 2014 , I'm so pleased you have found your balance with life and here and have found a path that works for you its helped me enormously

I remember posting to you way back and thanking you for all your support in my early days I really just wanted to reitterate my words I wouldn't be where I an today if it wasn't for you and for me that's the biggest compliment I can ever pay you

Castle2

Hi Shiny, A long time ago you wrote a post to me about how you wasted a lot of time not feeling worthy. I thought about that post a lot and just wanted to let you know that I think the message is finally starting to sink in, so thanks. Best to you.

Shiny,

Happy New Year. You went a long way during 2013 and that brought a lot of stress and anxiety. I hope that 2014 sees the beginning of a new and relaxed time for you as you embark on your new life. Good luck.

Tomso.