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Thank you Malc

Day 204. Busy week ahead capped off by going to the boxing on Saturday with my Ukrainian customers. klitschko-Joshua at Wembley, can't wait for that. Life is feeling a lot more positive now. Amazing what a non gambling head can truly achieve.

Day 205,

No bets, no urges, feeling really content and almost excited about what my gamble free future holds now.

Great Matt...so glad your feeling like that love....it's an exciting time...enjoy it....you've given yourself this chance of a new lifestyle....embrace it....but always remember how precious it is..

Thanks Loxxie.

I absolutely know how precious it is and my word will I protect and embrace any happiness and joy that comes my way now. I see life so differently now as I am allowing myself to finally do so. This is now my time and I will use it wisely. Everything happens for a reason and I am now a firm believer in fate. This all happened for me to truly address all my inner demons and now I am free.

Day 206 begins. No gambling, no urges. Seeing my Niece later, can't wait to see her little face.

Day 207.

Got my Friends/customers over from Ukraine this Weekend. When they first heard of my troubles back in December they came straight over to visit me. They said to me. "We have a saying in the Ukraine After the storm will come the sun but while it is raining we will be here to hold the Umbrellas". At that point I was so low and maybe didn't see any light at the end of my tunnel. Now I am feeling so much better and I am looking forward to seeing them this weekend to say thank you and to tell them I can see a rainbow now.

Sounds fantastic Matt. Enjoy your lovely weekend ahead. You so deserve it!

Take care.

Our Lady

Day 210.

Had a good weekend, however today is a tough day. Decided to start sorting the house, moving out of the spare room into the main bedroom. Done some housework and starting to slowly but surely turn what was my family home into I guess a bachelor pad.

Went into what was my exes daughters room and like a train a huge wave of sadness hit me. I sat on her window seat, looked at the almost empty bedroom and thought back to the happy times we all shared. I cried for the first time in a couple of weeks. I'm not sure how I have summoned the strength to get myself through this period but I know it's going to live with me for a long time what I have lost.

Stay strong everyone

Big hugs Matt, you have been so strong but change is hard. Sometimes even if you know you're 100% better off with out someone you still think back to when times were good. I've been a single parent since day dot(daughter is now 16) but we did have 'family' days out with her Dad when she was younger. But I remember getting back and thinking why can't it be like this all the time, I suppose it's the harsh reality of we xan't change the way other people act. I'm sure though your exes daughter will have fond memories of you and care about you, despite her Mother. Sorry this is a bit of a blurbm stay GF and take care S 🙂

Thanks Sharon.

I hope you are right becuase I am going to remember that little girl forever, I miss her so much. Being in the house is tough at times, I need to paint her room as soon as all the legal/financial stuff is done. I have to make some changes to complete the transition.

I take my hat off to anyone who raises a child on their own Sharon, utmost respect to you.

She will Matt, she'll remember the good times and what a kind, stable figure you were in her life. Children tend to see things for what they are and as she gets older she'll sadly realise her Mother is not all she seems to be 🙁 But you need to think about yourself and how you can stay on the GF road and one day someone will appear that deserves you. Thanks for your comment about raising children, hasn't been easy but producing a kind and considerate young lady is reward enough for me. Take care S:)

Matt keep going, you will always have them memories, but you have memories of your own to make too. Has your ex moved out then, all of her stuff gone etc? If she has and as soon as you can, you need to change the locks. Am sorry to sound so clinical, but you don't want anyone in your home, unless you invite them in. I can understand that it must be heartbreaking for you to see the room, and know the way it was. This pain will ease over time.

Take good care of you.

Julie x

Keep going mate you are doing a grand job, things in life are there to try us just depends on how we deal with things. Much easier dealing with things with out gambling.

Stay Strong Stay G/f

Malc

DAY 212 today

Thanks for all your comments, they are appreciated. Nearly all her stuff is gone but there are still things left for her to collect. I still haven't heard from her solicitor and she is maturely ignoring all my texts. Not sure I can change the locks as the mortgage is still in both our names annoyingly. Cannot wait until I can though!

Life is getting better, I am very much gamble free, It is just a huge (unwanted) transition from being a family man to a single one with no ties. Very mixed emotions.

Day 214 today.

Looking forward to the Weekend. Tonight I am going to the gym then off to meet some friends I have recently made in the area for a few drinks.

Saturday I am going to sort the garden out as it has been a bit neglected while I was away. Then Sunday I am off to London with My Mum, brother, his GF and my niece as we are taking her to see the Lion King at the theatre. I saw her last night she is crazily excited for it. I can't wait either that little girl has really helped me through some tough times.