I am stronger than I thought!

Hi Lotte, a new day,I hope you slept well and are feeling better, take care, Steve

Hi Charlotte

Hope you are feeling a bit more like your bestest self this morning

We all get up and down but you keep strong and by not going into that arcade just proves how strong you really are even if you didn't think it at the time

Well done girl , you will come out of this dark place lots of positives in your life , Maddison , bf and staying bet free 🙂

Keep strong girl

Lucy xxxxx

Hi Charlotte

Not much to add to all the words that have been said since your last post, well done on not giving in, speak to your boyfriend let him know how you feel, think of Madison and the care and suport she needs from you and most importantly you have your whole life ahead of you, you are a person that can do whatever you set your mind to, so get as much rest as you can and get back out here fighting for everyione as you do and dont forget to fight for yourself, we are all rooting for you,

God bless and stay strong

John

(((((Charlotte)))))

First of all - the way you feel is not something I have never heard before. Sometimes when we spend too much time alone with our thoughts, we can feel like an alien from outerspace. I don't mean alone in a room, I mean without sharing our thoughts with others. So I am glad you shared them here!

Secondly, I feel like the depression police on here, as I am always asking people if they are on any medication, but have you ever been diagnosed with depression? I am sorry, you may have mentioned this in the past on your diary already.

as Lnn says, it is totally understandable that you are a little emotionally skew whiff at the moment. You have had a really traumatic time lately, and give yourself credit for that. Your emotions are bound to be a bit fraught.

Anyway, keep an eye on your mood hun. If you find you are having more of those dark thoughts, you MUST see your GP. Just because you had them once, doesn't mean you have depression, but if they persist for more than a few weeks - even if it is not daily, go get some help.

You are doing great missus! I got close to caving loads, don't worry. You are doing your best!

Take care,

f x

Hello Charl,

Right let's do the positives: you didn't gamble!!! Amazing, in that situation where it sounded as though you had convinced yourself it was ok to lose a few pounds you still didn't! Yes the timing of your bfriend calling was perfect but you still resisted! You are one strong character And you should be proud that you didn't gamble!

Another positive you realise that gambling will only make things worse, you have come such a long way in a short space of time and you should be very proud!

As for the downsides, well I am in the same situation currently! I feel so sad at the moment, I feel tired, I feel de-motivated and generally rubbish! However, I am convinced this is still a positive bi-product of not gambling! Before we would have locked these feelings away but not we have our life back, we have more time again cos we are not gambling! Ultimately our brains are working overtime thinking about every last detail of our lives! We wouldn't have done this before we would gamble away the pain and eventually caused more pain!

Not gambling is our second chance and yes it's going to be tough, there are days I think I've never felt this sad but we have been in a metaphorical coma and now we are slowly coming out of that into real life! It's our time Charl, our future, gambling has no place in that future, we are going to have hard days but if you look around at the people close to you then surely the future is much brighter than the past!

Just my thoughts, I hope they help!

Flagg

Hi Charl... Sorry to hear you have rough time. But rhino about advantages: first of all - you did not go for usual gambling cure, you also probably found there is more shoulders you can rely on and you are not alone in your fight, you also reminded yourself there is somebody (wee one) who relies on you and news your help and attention. I m not sure is that makes things easier but you can face your rough times with the head held high because you havent hidden yourself in the gambling cave. So now you can face the life as free men and women should do. Freely, whatever is going to happen. Somehow i m convinced you will leave it behind you with victorious smile on the face. Stay strong stay focused. All the best. K.

HI Charl,

Nice to chat last night as always, Sorry your having a rubbish day and sometimes when im like that i just want to be left alone. Lots of people have said it char but it will pass and you wont always feel like this and the real positive is that you didnt gamble, we all have thoughts of it but you didnt act on them, you made the right decision so be proud of yourself.

Keep you chin up, things will be on the up again before you know it.

Blondie day 45xx

just popping in with Dotty to say hi ....brought some choccy bics....lol .... thinking of you...

Take care hun

Rach and Dots xx

Hi Charlotte

Just wanted to say that I think your an amazing person. You have helped so many people on this forum, including me. You are a big part of this community & your recovery is going really well.

Hope you are feeling better. Stay strong and keep smiling.

Thank u all so much 4 ur kind words and support on my diary. It means alot 2 me 🙂

I have said it b4 but I think ppl on this site are amazing, while dealing with their own problems they still support others!

No Freda, I have never suffered from depression. But I will keep an eye on it. Thanks 🙂

God, I read back my post from yesterday... it's so depressing. But that is how I felt then.

Last nite when my bf got in from work, I started to talk to him and I cried soo much I could not stop.. it goes from one extreme 2 another Lmm lol. He's never really seen me cry much and I don't do it often. But I felt better after. He was gr8 tbh 🙂

I went round to my nans 2day as it was her bday, she told me how proud she was of me. She told me how when I was pregnant she never thought I would give up all my nites out my partying etc. And how I surprised them all. She told me that she thinks I have done an amazing job with Maddison. It meant so much 2 me and made me realise that sometimes I am soo hard on myself. It made me realise that my life as changed so much and it's ok 2 sometimes feel down.

My bf got up with Maddison in the nite so I had a little more sleep. So I feel slighty less knackered.

2day, I have done alot of reflecting on everything. I realise that I put sooo much pressure on myself 2 deal with everything all at once. And I have been struggling!

I have some issues from my past 2 deal with, but I know now I have 2 do it slowly. It's not gonna happen overnite and gambling certainly won't help.

So i'm feeling alot more positive now than yesterday.

6 weeks gamble free 2day 🙂

I hope everyone else is doing well xx

Charl,

Six weeks gambling free is terrific.

Keep up the good work.

Tomso.

Hi Charlotte, a massive congrats on yor 6 weeks, you are doing an amazing job little one, you should be so proud of yourself 🙂 If you were my daughter I would be one proud momma. You have had a real tough time lately esp with the babby being ill and all the stress and worry that comes with that, but you have coped remarkably well, and your nans right, you have done a great job all round. No one can blame you for having reached point break, many of us older guys would have cracked long ago, but you being the trooper that you are, just let it poke its ugly wee face in for 5 minutes, and 'splat' you knock it right back to where it came from. Good on you girl.

Keep posting and chatting, you're a true inspiration to all who know you 🙂

Take care

Cameron

High five to you ,

Not only for the 6 weeks, but for everything else as well.

People believe in you , all you need to do now is believe in yourself.

everyone has bad days, as I am sure you have picked up on from me and Rach although we do take it too the extreems lol

So I will end by saying , be proud , very proud of all your achievements and

DON'T STOP BELIEVING !

(what a great name for a song !)

Dusty xxxx

Hey Char,

Sorry I went of chat so quick little one woke up screaming again gotta love them hay lol.

Just wanted to say thanks for all your help and support.

You are doing amazing like alot of people have said you have had alot to deal with last few weeks and you have stayed strong and most importantly gamble free!

6 weeks is great mate keep it going.

Stay strong

Shaun

Shaun

Hi Charlotte

Good to see things are more positive for you x

Talking really is the best medicine and writing what you feel even though hard will help

Your keeping strong and that makes me smile 🙂

Take care

Lucy xx