Last Chance

Well done on telling your story

You came to a good site where I found a lot of people on here are very supportive.

Good luck on making G##bling absent from your life

Keep posting on bad days and good days it does help.

GR4Y

Hi Tommy

Today I went to my first counselling session.

I haven't gambled for two days. Two days is absolutely massive for me. I probably haven't gone 2 days for the last 6 months.

It's hard it's tough but resolve to take each day as it comes. Find another distraction, read or exercise, whatever it takes to keep you away from gambling.

Every day you don't gamble you don't lose. Yes you don't win either but ask yourself this question, have I ever been up? And when I was why didn't I just stop?

I'll follow your posts, I'm going through it too, give it your best, give it all you have.

Kevin

Hi Tommy

Do not think back at the losses as it may cause you to have resentments. This is understandable but resentments can lead you to gambling again. Let the loses go! I promise it is the best way. You now have a great chance to move forward with your life without gambling. You owe it to yourself to give yourself a fighting chance of cracking this addiction.

Take care

I'd just like to start with a thank you to those who posted their support & wise words.

I start Day 3 gamble free, but I have to be honest, last night I was looking at odds for the football & I woke up this morning thinking about gambling. I haven't given in but I feel weakest when I have time on my hands or when boredom hits.

I really have to get it into my head that I can neve gamble again, this is not just a break, I have to stop for good. I'm trying to fight my thoughts, the addiction in me telling me to have just a small bet for fun.

This is tough...

Hi TP

As gambling has been a big part of your life for so long it is natural for you to want to do what is "normal" to you. Now there is no gambling there is a void in your life. It is up to you to seek out something new to do. Just stay away from gambling to start with and something will be of interest that catches your eye. If, however, you haven't had enough pain you will return to the fire to get your fingers burnt again. It is a choice we have today. However if we self exclude we have a better chance of not gambling. Your choice today if you want to place a bet but I know what I'm doing

Take care

Day 7

I have been keeping myself busy, as Smiler said there is a void in my life, as sad as it sounds gambling had become a hobby & a big part of my life.

I certainly don't want to get my fingers burnt. I know that I can't ever gamble again, no matter how small the stakes start off with, they will ALWAYS spiral out of control.

I'll keep fighting!

11 Days in

Feel that it's going ok. I've passed two weekends without gambling. Been a bit down this weekend, I pressume that it's because i've not been feeding my addiction.

I've got some debt that I want to start paying off. I will try to do this off over the next 6 months. This will be a great step towards freedom. I musn't get ahead of myself as I've gone 4 months without gambling in the past. Day by Day.

I try not to think about it too much which is why I don't blog everyday. Just when I feel the need to reflect.

Hi Tommy

Well done for coming here and starting your diary. Its a fantastic place and you will get lots of advice help and support here.

If I can just echo what smiler said. Let the loses go.. accept them as lost.. never chase them. One thing that i always tried to do was finish being UP. It never worked. Every time i said i was quitting there was a small part of me that wasnt satisfied with that and wanted to GET EVEN or get a big win before i quit. It dosent work It will just pull you in deeper.

Self exclusion works. But there are so many hundreds of places to gamble its almost impossible to get them all. Giving someone else control of your account worked for me. Started by letting my mum check my online statements, but that didnt work as I just done it anyway hoping she would miss them. In the end, she had to completly control my account, giving me 'pocket money' and my wages were paid into Her bank account. Pretty extreme for a grown man... but it worked.

You are very right about the hole in your life that not gambling anymore leaves. You spent hundreds of hours gambling, and a secret life that you dont have any more. Never mind the thrill of the excitement. This is dangerous. You need to find something else to do. MAny gamblers often relapse simply from boredom.

I understand this terrible illness my using an analogy. SAy that my gambling is a voice in my head which will always be there telling me to gamble. depending on how bad my gambling is or how well ive done by not gambling the voice will be at a certain volume between 1 - 10. To understand it better say the VOICE is a piece of music. so this song is constantly playing in my head telling me to gamble.... However, I have another voice or SONG in my head which Im calling LIFE. Lifes volume is set between 1 - 10 also depending on what im doing, how im feeling, if im busy, happy, sad etc. So im i have a nice rewarding busy life my LIFE SONG is at a high volume. This DROWNS OUT the gambling song so I cant hear it. My gambling songs level 4 and my life songs level 7. I can only hear Life song. But if I get depressed, bad things happen, or i get bored.. my life song gets turned down and i can hear my gambling song again.. and im compelled to gamble. When im at a stage where im conflicted and want to gamble but just about manage not too its because both songs are about the same level.

Trick is .. keep your life song up. In time your gambling song... which WILL ALWAYS be there, will get turned down to 1 or 2 and you probably wont hear it again. Just dont be complacent. Does that make sense. Sorry i have the tendency to drone on lol

Keep good. Be positive. Stay Strong... Just Breathe

All the best

Kyle

The greatest win I will ever have, is to learn I will never win gambling

Kyle, thanks for the advice, some really wise words and I found it a great help. All of it is so true.

I've been doing really well, haven't come close to gambling because I haven't put myself into situations where I can. I must stay focused, this is the rest of my life that I need to stay away from gambling, not just taking a break from it.

I feel better for not gambling. Happier.

felt low today for the first time. it's not that i wanted to gamble, more that I feel such an idiot for doing it for 7 years too many. i know i shouldn't look back. stay positive. just annoying that i've got all this debt to pay off before i can feel a bit more free from gambling, i feel that once i pay my debts off, then my gamble free life can really begin.