Long road ahead

Itw

welcome.

I hope you find the strength to fill out those self exclusion forms. The cost of some passport photos against the losses gambling offers.

Your choice fella. Me i know which one will make you a winner. Take someone with you when you go. It will help.

The bottom line is it is about making a choice.

One only you can decide. There is a wealth of support and folk who will gift you some great advice. But this is about our choice.

Mine 19 months ago was to arrest my addiction, there is no cure. No medicine or magic potion you can take.but each day I don't give in to my addiction i do actually win.

I hope whatever your choice is, it serves you well.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Hi Duncan,

Thanks for you kind message of support.

I've been and got the self exclusion forms, not realising the need for passport photos. Thought it would be the matter of filling out the forms, ding dang doo!

I went 9 months with 2 mishaps. When times are hard the urges came out the winner. I know what I need to do and now it's time to hit it out the park for good!

Actions speak louder than words

I am whit you!this is my start too!

Nearly the end of day 1, it's been long and quite hard. No urges but many thoughts about regret in what I've done, emotional to say the least. Since my girlfriend went to work my mind has gone stir crazy. First thing I did was put the bank card and money in her bag. It was hard but I know it has to be done!

Crying won't work but its what I've felt like doing most of the night. Bring on day 2...

Itw

good for you my friend.

My advice log those bast#ard sh#it feelings in your brain and when those urges come because they will.

Use those desparate feelings to help your resolve.

There is no shame in crying. Be proud that your facing the one thing that will screw you for all you have and more if you let it.

Today you stopped.

Today well done.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

It's good to know that there is support out there when I'm down and out. My worry to be honest is my girlfriend coping and dealing with this. She knows I'm compulsive but didn't know the lengths I could go until yesterday to hide it! It's a struggle to even admit to her that I'm breaking up inside, the closest person to me and yet I feel a lifetime away from her.

I have no access to a computer and only have iPhones and an iPad as access to the World Wide Web. I've never been an online gambler. But logically that's my next step if I need a fix after self exclusion. Is there a way to block websites, apps etc and hand control to my girlfriend?

Fella oh am sure there is ways to block you i phone and pad.

Me i only ever went into a bookies never been online.

Don't intend to!!!

For this is the choices you will face.

I will say this be 100% honest with your gf. I have been with my wife for 21 yrs in October. All my gambling life. She today shares recovery. My diary here is transparent. A totally honest account of my recovery warts and all.

The good times are there to enjoy too. Recovery does gift you that through making the right choice.

Again well done.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

And day 2 begins. Browsing facebook... *******, football accumulators, posts about winnings... Hidden. Today is going to be a good day 🙂

Hi ltw,

Welcome to this fantastic forum, the main thing done...you admit you have a problem. This desease has no breaks, it can destroy you....but you have a choice! Make that right choice and get all the rewards it brings. Enjoy your life, you loved ones will enjoy it too.

You know you can do it, it is not easy but surely possible. Believe in yourself and take day at a time

All the best

Sandra x

Day 2... Easy so far, switch the tv over when I see an advert and blocking ads on facebook. Feeling good!

Found it pretty easy today, kept myself busy. The day isn't over but I feel confident in being able to make the finish line.

Going to see if I can enrol in college, get back in web design or something tomorrow. Happily awaiting Thursday for when my step daughter comes home! Ill constantly be busy then, never a minutes break then!

Dinner time on day 3. Feeling really good in myself today. Had a few urges but managed them quite easy. Not only that I would usually have had 7/10 f**s by now and I've had 2! I feared that because my girlfriend was at work on a long shift that I would be prone to a bit of a mishap. No money, access restricted!

Happy, happy, happy!

After reading a few stories today I realise how far my addiction could have gone. I'm in no real debt, but will one day repay the many favours that family and friends have done for me during the illness! I'm lucky that I admitted my problem early on - it could have been an impossible situation to get out of.

I've always known I've got an addictive personality so usually know when I'm getting hooked on something. The only thing I can't get away from is Call of Duty, the missus hates it!

So ill stick to Duncan's time-money-location and carry on perfecting my defence against this disease 🙂

Hiya mate,

Just read your diary great to see you found this and admitted you had an addiction early on that is great to hear. I was similar and realised i had a major problem in the first year of gambling but let it get the better of me I have now gambled more than 7 years and got a lot of debts and regrets things that will haunt me or stay with me forever.

Like you said though actions speak louder than words, The first step I took was going round every bookies to self exclude my wife went with me to everyone cost a bit in passport photos but the best investment ever, also she has my bank card so without money you can't gamble. It definitely works.

I had a big relapse in January though and it lasted best part of 4 months before i had to stop. That's when I started GA and the wife having the bank card and being in control of my finances because I cudnt be trusted. But since going GA I have now been gamble free for over 130 days and still going strong.

It is also funny I had a massive gaming problem but recently just stopped gaming sold my xbox with cod etc never thought I would see that day lol. But you just never know what you may think in the future or turn of events may happen. All I can say is take each day as it comes and the road to recovery will lead you to a more positive life 🙂

All the best in your recovery stay strong.

Ricky

Thanks for the response. When I first quit gambling it was in December '12, I'm not sure of a date. I wasn't really wanting to quit but did it for my family. I doubted their concerns regarding my problem but stuck at it anyway. A few months passed and I was feeling on top of the world!

I did go to 6 or 7 GA meetings but I found myself lying to not only myself but the people there and around me.

9 months on and I start my process again! Renewed and ready to take on this illness head to head!