forgot to add...
day 96 - no gambling today
debt-free (roughly) - 24th december 2013
Jim tanks for the words of wisdom - you are 3 months in and a true inspiration I will follow your journey and seek inspiration!
Cheers mate
and words of wisdom they are.
In my 2 and a bit years on here "digging that hole with a shovel and filling it with a teaspoon" is one of the best phrases if not the best ive read on here.
Well said jim,97 days under difficult circumstances,well done,keep going friend,this can and will be done. 😉
Just three more days to go!
Your debt free day is not that long after mine (hopefully around Easter/Summer 2013).
It feels great to be able to say that I will be debt free NEXT YEAR!
GT
97 no thoughts of gambling today.
Thanks for your comments - always nice to know to know that someone is reading.
As irrelevant as it is (in the grand scheme of things), I am looking forward to a three-figure trophy of gambling abstinence. I can safely say I won't gamble until Tuesday at least!
Well done Jim. You're doing really well. You can be proud of yourself.
Thanks, milkman. You're super.
Day 98, and (confidentally) Day 99
No gambling today
1 day to go to the big 100. i see you had a good positive delivery from the milkman yesterday, always good to get. 🙂
how is your OH doing, ye wont find the big day coming now.
Keep strong
Top of the morning to you on this your 100th day gamble free. You should feel so proud of yourself for the journey you have undertaken in these 100 days. I know there were many ups and down, many time when it would have been very easy to give in and just hit the BJ table but you did not. You have moved on to a much better place in your life, a happier place that you can enjoy being in.
You now have a great foundation in place to build a happy gamble free future for you and your family and I know how important that is to you.
Thanks again for all the support and help you have given me on this site, it is greatly appreciated.
On wards and upwards to next big milestone. 6 months gamble free here you come.
Congratulations on reaching Day 100! You have done really well to get this far. Keep it up!
Well done Jim 100 days !
It was like my birthday, opening my diary and finding the messages of goodwill.
100 days strong! And 30 days before it with one blip, which surely helped (both the blip and the abstinence).
I can feel a brief speech coming on.
Firstly, in a previous life I was milkman. It doesn't matter now, since it's highly unlikely that I'll be caught out again. I revealed too much about myself, and that led me to be identified by my OH when the computer froze one morning after I had post 'Day 61', and then gone to work. It was, unfortunately, one of the 'soul-searching' entries in which I said something along the lines of 'blah blah last ten years' and then 'I nearly lost my house this year because of my binges'.
I am ashamed to say that I lied my way out of it, successfully. I was lucky in two respects - one is that my OH is not very computer-savvy and didn't know how to get into the internet history etc, and therefore see the rest of the site or diary. The second is that English is not her first languauge, although she is fluent, but there was enough doubt there for me to tell her that 'lost my house THIS year' referred to the time ten years ago, before we met, as in 'in this year'. She knows I have gambled in the past, so it wasn't a total surprise. I don't care what anyone says, now is not the time to tell her and I'm not sure I ever will (although I might). I might add that I hadn't actually lied to her before this point - I am the sole breadwinner and manage the finances. She never asks. This didn't justify, it just meant that I never had to lie directly. So, it really was painful to do it to her face. In some ways I was more worried about her reading the actual thoughts rather than the debts. I am very secretive about my other life.
Anyway, the dust did settle and things are a lot better now, in every way. She doesn't mention it now. The finances, whilst fragile, are stable and starting to improve. I am getting more work (I have a second, more lucrative job, and it's picking up finally).
What is surprising, and horrifying, is that these past few days I've started to miss gambling a little. I'm in no rush to go back down there, esp with another child due anytime, but being able to relax just a little has brought back, not the 'hunger' exactly but perhaps a 'taste' of wanting it again. I really won't do it, and i'm working hard to keep the demons banished.
None of this would be possible without this site. The early entries were very important to my recovery, they've gone now because it was mm's diary, but they were scottm, jamesp and Russ. Lots of other people have contributed throughout, GT, SA, winningpost, shorty, Keith, elite, NW, Liz40, smiler and lots of others (sorry for not remembering you all while I'm writing). Special mention for Pelle for his regular input.
And a very special thanks to Pat, who is obviously me 'give up partner', and whose diary is (generally) very optimistic and good at pointing out the important things in life, which had an important effect on me.
Stay strong all!
Great speech and a massive well done on 100 days. Long may this continue for you.
GT
:-))))
Well done mate. Good start to a long journey. Hopefully one day it will not be such a task staying away from gambling and being a non gambler will just come as natural as breathing.
Well done and keep up the good work
Keith
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