My 2016 diary

Well i made it to 40 and beyond ! 41 days Gamble free,,

Managed friday night with no issues didnt really even look at the bandits 🙂 so very happy about that indeed ..

I should hopefully get my job offer today .. while looking forward to that i'm not looking forward to handing my notice in after just 8 months ... eeek ..

So where next on my target ? don’t want to set it too far away so lets say another 2 weeks .. 15/02 to make it 55 days J then a short one to the 22/02 for a whole 2 months !! J

Lets hope all this good news isn’t shadowed by some bad on the IVA front but I’m trying to keep positive .. that’s out of my hands though it still is a problem in the mists

Have a good week folk

Kris

Well

17/02 10:55 am IVA creditors meeting!!! what a date that is going to be /// almost 2 months after the faithful day .. finally find out if it's an IVA or bankruptcy i guess...

really nervous about it but excited too... going to be a lot of things happening and changing over the next month .. which as i have said things changing throw me and probably effect the way i think .... so I have to be extra vigilant to stop the possibility of gambling further ... I will probably hand over my cash card to the wife.. and just have enough in the wallet for emergencies till things calm down... there's no way i will leave a door open for me to relapse during this time..

Kris

Good luck with it all Kris.....i've got my fingers crossed for you.

Im sure it will all turn out well.

Damian

Cheers Damian ,

I hope it turns out ok but as we all do towards the inevitable end i took out more credit to cover losses with the aim never to gamble again but to fall short and use the credit avail for gambling racking up more debt .. £20k+ in the final 2 months all of which was pretty much new credit / loans .. it wont go in my favour but im also in the mindset there's not much they can do.. cant take what i dont have etc .. but to have them grill me over 45+k of spends some of which was general living expenses but most gambling is very unsettling ..

I have my first counselling session tomorrow for the gambling so interested to see how that goes... and on my other issues my first counselling session for that is on the 9th feb .. may have to start a 2 stage counter on here .. don't want to split the 2 issues across sites but won't scream and shout about the other too much on this site but it may help to keep it all counting in the same place 🙂

Kris

Hi Kris , we can't do much about what's happened buddy but we can about the future , the fact that youv'e faced up to everything will only go in your'e favour in the future , so you can hold your head high on that one mate !

Deep respect fella !

Hey alan 🙂

Thanks matey I will try and do the best I can.. Think it all hit me a bit earlier .. But I guess that was the Unknown .. Feel a tad better now.. Some other good news is if it's approved then I get my new job I can keep 50% of the increase which is good for all involved I can pay more back .. I can keep some for myself for the hard work and treat us as a family .. These two weeks will be a long haul I know that ..but can only hope all comes good .. Was great today to pick the boy up in daylight .. It will only get lighter now so really happy about that

Hope you're well too matey

Great news about the job buddy , made up for you ! and the extra money will come in handy thats for sure but don't be in a mad rush to pay everything back at one , you still have to live and enjoy the treats for being a good boy now !.

Recovery's for life so don't rush !.

Have a good one buddy !

day 42 ! counselling day..

I guess this will make my recovery a little more real ! go to my first counselling session today at 1 .. looking forward to it.. not sure what to expect .. I'm not overwhelmed with guilt or those feelings of needing to gamble so will be strange to open up on the matter ..

Hoping to get my job offer in writing today so i can stop hiding it from my work collegues 🙂 its not nice having to walk around knowing you're leaving but no one else does lol.

hope we al have a good day

Kris

what a rollercoaster of a ride i'm on atm !!!

I have received confirmation of my new job and just handed my notice in ! gotta wait to speak to the boss so still a little nervous about that,. never nice handing the notice in.. so in 42 days i have gone from no outlook on life to just about everything falling into place ,, can this be too good? surely something has to mess up though this could be natures way of evening it's self out and paying me back for the bad luck I had before !

staying positive !

Kris

It would say no it cant be too good Kris.....I think this proves what a little honesty and positivity can do.

Congrats on the new job and I hope the good decisions you are making continue to get the reward they deserve.

Your story certainly helps to bring me hope for the future...so thanks for sharing it.

Damian

HI damian 🙂

Seems i was a little right as for some strange reason unbeknown to me my contracts states 3 months notice period though i thought it was one ? its something we will have to sort as employee / employer .. hoping it doesnt drag out though as will leave me in limbo .. and not really wanting to put my effort in for the last month or 3 if they cost me this opportunity ... sure they wouldnt want substandard work as much as i wouldnt enjoy doing substandard work either lol

..

onto counselling ... it was nice to open a little and not have to hide how when how much etc ... though on the stop gambling front i had pretty much done everything they suggested .. only thing left is to allow my wife to see my bank statements when ever she would like .. which is a good idea as i could use that account as and when if it came down to it so having another blocker in place cant be a bad thing ... I will be attending again next tuesday where i guess we will try and find triggers etc and see how the past week has gone...

TBH talking and counting on here keeps me alert unlike any time in the past where i may have gone weeks without bets i had nothing to look back on or write my feelings on the matter ... a life long journy in words... unlike facebook i can be honest and open about "just" about everything ...

We did go over some of the wins and trying to put it in perspective i was up at one point £7k ,, seven thoushand pounds ... in writing it isnt a lot of money .. im sure if that was in front of me it would have changed my mind about throwing thousands back in .. but thats the way it is..

another gamble free day out of the way ... off to the mothers now .. easy stroll to 43 days from here

Hi Kriss , Sorry to hear about the issues with you handing your notice in but in comparison to what youv'e just done for yourself over the last few weeks its nothing more than a blip , if you face it the way you have with everything else youv'e dealt with I don't see it being a problem !

Glad the counciling went ok !

Take care buddy !

day 43 ! 🙂 seem to be counting up nicely ..

Had a though about the footie bets last night though mainly after most of the favorites were winning but didnt have a bet so those thoughts quickly faided .. no what if's, and my team lost again so least i wasn't gutted on 2 accounts

And still checking about notice period .. so pants to be left in limbo atm .. seems they can give me 1 months notice but i have to give 3 ? will be cleared up soon enough i guess as i have to get something sorted .. if it was to mess up my next job i would leave if they don't require the references from here.. see how my meeting goes..

another week and i will be at my next target of 50 days ! and 2 weeks today is the IVA date..

also the sun is setting much later and really feeling the benefit of the longer days now 🙂 not as depressed ..

hope to be posting some good news on the job front later but till then hope we all have a good day

Kris

day 44 ! ..

keeping strong .. and my depresson is coming to an end thats for sure.. everyday i can feel myself smiling more and more and the usual bouncing ball of hyperactivness is creeping back in ... which is good an may help with what will happen in less than 2 weeks now .. the dredded creditors meeting ! :/

Onto the job front .. i did sign a 3 month notice period though i doubt i will be honouring it as it's not reasonable for my position and it wasn't highlighted before I accepted the job.. coming from 2 jobs before similar roles both were 4 weeks notice so if you dont know you dont look .. that and the job I'm going for is only 4 weeks and the payscale is worlds apart ,,, I didnt really want to breach or leave on bad terms but if thats what it takes so be it... I will loose my holiday pay ( i have some spare_) so probably just chew them up ... and they can't not pay me for time worked and i'll be paid before leaving so thats pretty good.. 🙂 fingers crossed things run smoothly for a while..

hope we all have a good gambling free day 🙂

Kris

Good work getting to day 44 Kris.

Not sure what benefit it is for them to keep someone who isnt going to be happy doing there job so lets hope you can come to some sort of arrangement.

You asked the new job if they would wait 3 months for you worst case?