my betting diary

Your welcome hun no thanks needed.

Check out local salvation army as well.

Sorry things havent gone to well hun,i left my partner after a year of arguments and cr** so i know where your head is right now.

I left with nothing but now have a house full of stuff,put the feelers out its amazing what people come up with.

Take Care hun hope you get some sleep.

Stay Strong

E xx

Hey wp,

I know things seem bleak right now, and it is a fight day after day, and even though I've been single throughout this gambling thing, I still feel that those around me don't completely trust me.

Don't let that bleakness of where you are now drive you back into the place which was a hundred times blacker and grimmer than you are now.

If you want to come to Wales, I've got an 8ft leather sofa you can have....it's living in the garage cause we couldn't figure out how to get it in to my parent's place.

All the best

Ryan

Hello mate--I must admit I have not been reading any other diaries recently so have missed out on what has happenned. Sorry to hear that the relationship has gone pear shaped again. Sometimes people cannot stop having a dig can they. I know it may not seem so now but if a relationship comes to a natural conclusion the reasons are not always as one sided as they seem. Some people hook into something that they can hurt the one they are supposed to love with. To bring up the gambling time after time is merely a way of controlling a situation. As you say, when would the time come when she could accept you for the new you and not the old you. Children do not deserve to live with the hostility of a bad relationship either and I am sure that your little one is still young enough to easily adapt eventually to the new situation.

Glad to see that you are not returning to your old ways of gambling but perhaps now is the time to try something different with your debts. You and I both know a good man who took the way of bankrupcy to free his life back up again. That process was not easy and certainly no quick fix but he is now in a position to look forward rather than back as well. Is this something that may help? If you have credit card debt have a look on my diary for a link.

I have been bemoaning my own current position lately and have felt quite despondent but reading your diary has made me feel very selfish. I too need to take a deep breath.

Allthe bestmate

Stumper

Hey wp,

Just wanted to pop by and say hope your feeling a tad better about things today and you got some sleep last night.

Stumper is right about it not being good for the kids my main reason for leaving was how it was all affecting the boys,im sure your LO will be ok and they do adapt very quickly.

I know you post on your phone and its not always easy but let us know your ok and we are all here to support you.

Take Care

E xx

wp,

Very sorry to hear of your troubles. You have always been so supportive of others, and you are having a successful recovery over a prolonged period...you don't deserve this to happen to you now.

Firstly, as I'm sure you know, gambling isn't going to help anything. If you need to do something destructive, choose another vice, not that one. There's just not one atom of goodnees that can come out of it, as you know.

As to the flat, there are options. We moved into our house in July, it's now fully furnished and we've paid for nothing except the bed. It's just amazing what people throw away, or have in their garages. Have you tried freecycle? I don't know where you are, but google with the nearest decent sized town near to you. You have to register, and you're supposed to offer something first, but it isn't obligatory. Put adverts in PO windows ('furniture needed, please help' ought to do it). Ours was by word of mouth, and we're over-full now. In fact, we have a wardrobe we're getting rid of and it's pretty OK. We're in yorksh, that near to you?

As to the rest, well, no words will be of comfort at this time, but it will settle in the near future, and you'll be in a better position to move forward, whichever direction you need to go in. Just don't do anything rash.

Mm

Hi wp

26 months without a bet is incredible and that's something for all of us on here to aspire to. Nobody can guarantee happiness after giving up gambling, the trail of destruction left behind certainly takes some cleaning up. I'm sure you know in your heart of hearts that your life has no place for gambling any more. You take away the gambling from life and this is what you have left. If you don't like what's left then you have to pluck up the courage to make a change.

You've had some sound advice from other members on here with freecycle etc, I've basically given away a whole house of furniture and appliances for next to nothing as we moved into a fully furnished house.

Keep the faith and i'm sure things will improve, you have a whole community of gamcare members giving positive energy to you.

Take care, all the best pal

Keith

Hi Mate--hope your mood has improved today.

The idea of 'freecycle' sounds a good idea in the short term. Mind you I keep smiling at the thought of you picking up that wardrobe from Yorkshire and putting it in the cab of the train alongside you as you take it back up north!!

Even in times od adversity it is important to find something to smile about.

All the best

Stumper

Are there any car boot sales near you? You would be surprised to see what you can find there especially if you turn up as early as possible.

They won't be huge at the moment but come April or May, there will be plenty of bargains around.

GT

I know that you have been busy but don't forget to check in on the 2012 gamble free thread!

GT

Hey wp

Giving up now, is not aloud. What is the point? The point is, you get You better, day by day , week by week, month by month, year by year.

You have friends here who care, care a lot.

Don't go for payday loans,PLEASE!

Have a look at charity shops or do what I did when I walked out on my ex-husband and had an empty flat, empty, not even a radio. I put up a big notice at my work place which said - Am starting from scratch - please help - need everything from a cup to a bed. If you have any stuff you no longer need, I'd love to have it. Thank you so much -

Within a week I had taken carloads of stuff home, from plates, mugs, cups, saucepans storage jars, cutlery, bedding, linen, towels. I was even given a double bed base and 2 single beds for my children. The only things I bought new was a small 3 piece suite from a club book which I paid off monthly.(I still have that 3 piece suite, lol, symbol of my newfound freedom after a 20 year abusive marriage) It restored my faith in humans. E-mail me your address and I will send you some stuff. Before you know it you will have your place as a livable place. You can buy new later, bit by bit. I did. Have faith in human kindness.

Sending love and hugs your way

God Bless

Sabine

wp,

I'm so sorry to hear of your current position. You did good coming here and posting. It helped you massively through the bad times 2 years ago.

You have my email address. Hugs and support in any way I can.

Brian

Hi wp, I'm really sorry that things have ended up as they are. Try and think positive, that this could be a new beginning for you. The main thing is that you keep access to your little one. I was having a conversation with the wife yesterday in the car. We hardly ever talk about gamcare, but it came up in conversation. I then mentioned that you had moved out. She then went on to make an observation from the 'partners' side of things. She stated that gamcare is an excellent place for us gamblers to recovery and get ourselves sorted again. She went on to say that it an also give the ex gambler a false sense of achievement. We are all constantly congratulating each other on the time we have accumulated not gambling. We therefore have this sense of 'look at me, I've achieved so much....I don't gamble anymore', but in their eyes we are just becoming what they expected of us....and that's to me 'normal'. Hence when you and I and many others on here get a few years down the road we start getting frustrated that they can't see what we have now become.....a 'non gambler', but for them that's again normal. The partners will just see the things that they are longer able to buy, to do or the lack of trust. They don't see the legend that is winningpost on gamcare. You are a legend in my eyes, you have helped so many on here.....but outside of this site we are just getting back to normality and this is the least that our partners expect. I hope that makes sense to you. You've had some great advice about sorted your accommodation. Pay day loans are not the answer. Take care fella and thinking of you. Russ

Worried about you fella. Are you alright?

its been nearly a month. Many thanks for your kind posts and well beings.

Russ,from my partners view of things it takes a lifetime of recovery and not just my 27 months bet free .the hurt and pain is there within everyday.congratulations to yourself on reaching 2 years bet free.

Brian cheltenham is an utter nightmare for us horse racing addicts and always will be within our hearts. Its everywhere and very difficult to avoid.

Sabine,you are one special lady to me on here.your health is not the best yet you still find the time to offer me bits and pieces.

Lucky jim,like elizabeth thanks for the freecycle advice,there are bargains to be had out there though ive yet to accumulate anything but is definitely worth browsing.

Keith,keep up the good work mate,you are making great in roads in beating this addiction.i just know we will get through this week unscathed.

Stumper great to see you haven't lost that sense of humour,

Ryan thanks for the offer,appreciated but unfortunately where i am 8ft is probably twice the size of my sitting room 🙁

getting there keep up your excellent and valued work on here though i think you couldve helped the horse racing fraternity on here with a check in bang in the middle of cheltenham.it's massive to us horse lovers mate.

Me,i am still bet free despite all Thats gone on. I went 19 days without seeing my family and it was torturing me. Some days i could cope other days just had nae energy and was too upset,maybes a bit of depression.i haven't gambled,simple fact i haven't got money to burn so here i go heading into month 28 bet free but still miserable.

I will get round to posting to others when i feel a bit better in myself.

Today i haven't bet tomorrow s another day especially with this festival week amongst us but i will get through it with no damage done for the 3rd successive year as i have swapped onto afternoon shifts,

Best wishes friends,

good luck all,

winning post (last bet 14/12/09)

Hi wp... well done on your 28 months. I can't imagine how it must feel to be in your shoes just now but your not gambling and thats always a positive. Am not sure what else to say, but wanted to say hello.. all the best mate.. S.A 🙂