Outside chance

Well done for finding your way here, Myles. Stick to it. You're 5 days into a journey that will be trying but in the end, worth it. Put your mind to it, stay strong, be dedicated in your goal of being bet free and you'll find it less trying, and easier with each passing day.

Alex

Hey Myles,

Great of you to come aboard and seek some help and advice. It's a tuff battle for sure but one that can be reached with some great dedication and perserverence. I'am a compulsive gambler also, my g.o.c. was slots. I would recommend you looking into some 1 on 1 therapy or group therapy. It has helped me to remain sober for 58 days. You will also recieve a ton of support on here from alot of great people. I know Gamcare offers counseling and support also, have you contacted them yet? I have a thread on the intros forum under "chart of compulsive gambling and recovery" the info is from my group therapy class, the education part of it, read the posts. Great job on abstaining from gambling for 5 days, the first couple weeks are really tuff, but it gets a bit easier after that. I wish you the best in your recovery process.

Chicagoguy

Hi myles,

Welcome to the forum and well done on taking what can sometimes be the hardest step I my our recovery accepting and admitting you are a compulsive gambler, that step alone took me nearly 20 years.

Finding this site was one of the best things I ever did in aiding my recovery from this terrible addiction.

Well done on your gamble free days so far you now need to build on those, take it slow in fact just one day at a time that saying is now embedded in my mind, I can do anything for 24 hours the gambling madness and misery will still be there tomorrow but today I choose not to gamble.

It will be tough I won't lie bit I,promise you it will be worth it. Today is a new day and you have a chance to turn it around, grab that chance and the life that you and your family deserve .

Take care

Blondie

Hello to everyone,

Thank you for your messages of support.

In response to your message, Alex, I am finding it difficult to supress the urges particularly in hours of boredom such as last night. However I am encouraged by the fact that I am far less stressed now that I am not gambling and chasing my losses. I can only see this positive attitude reinforcing itself if I remain committed and, as you said, things will get easier in time.

Chicagoguy, I read some of your diary before deciding to write my own. I note that you are very active on the forums and your messages of support are warmly received. Congratulations on your continued abstinence as you approach two months now. Long may it continue for both of us. I am yet to look into such things as counselling as I am hoping that my firm resolve will remain. For the first time, at the age of 24 and after 5 years of destructive gambling, I am realising that the only way is to not gamble as addictive behaviour cannot be moderated. I intend to go to GA meetings once I feel that I can control the urges.

Also thank you Blondie for your message as you reinforce a message that my mum often tries to deliver with the 'one day at a time' method. She has attended Al-Anon for several years as she was married to my dad who was an alcoholic until he died in 2011. She closely identifies with this phrase and I too can see that it is useful as it breaks the recovery process into manageable pieces.

I am very grateful for your messages and that you have taken the time to read my diary. I am already dreading next week with Cheltenham Festival on the horizon!

Best wishes, Myles

Hey myles,

Well done on your continued journey to a gamble free life. Sounds like your doing great and working through the ups and downs. Your a young guy, lots of life ahead of you and you don't want this addiction getting in the way. Stay strong and be proud of yourself, your doing it.

Chicagoguy

Myles,

Just been reading through the start of your diary. Well done for getting yourself on here, and accepting you've had enough of the beast that is gambling. Sorry to hear about your Dad; I too lost my father - in fact, probably at about the same age as you(I was 22), and I know how tough it can be. Some people tell me my gambling might be related in some way to that grief, although that seems a little too simple, and I don't really buy it. After all, I was gambling long before he passed away.

Anyway... one thing I wanted to say. You mention 'I intend to go to GA meetings once I feel that I can control the urges.' It might be wise to get down there sooner - after all, it's when the urges are strongest that we CGs need the most support. Meetings may or may not be for you (recovery is bespoke after all), but I'd recommend that anyone give them a shot at least once. You'll see a lot of like-minded people (and possibly a few horror stories) that will only serve to help in putting your own recovery in context.

You're five years younger than me... but I'd like to think we're both still young enough to lead happy and prosperous lives away from gambling. You're doing a great thing in addressing this now.

Wishing you all the best mate

D123

Hey Myles,

Thanks for the post, very true your words are. This is a tuff addiction but if we can just believe in ourselves and try to heal the trail of pain we may have left behind us, we can find peace with ourselves and others we have hurt. You are doing great and have a good handle on what it will take to get it done, stay strong, and keep on keeping on.

Chicagoguy

Hi Myles

Just want to say well done for remaining gamble free, you are doing great.

Sounds like next week will be a huge test for both of us, i dont think anyone can love Cheltenham more than i do, maybe as much but not more! I would take the time off work to watch it every year but realise this year i can no longer do it, not if i want to remain free from gambling that is.

Im sure we can stay strong and get through it.

All the best

Cheltenham sucks!!!!!! I live just around the corner from the racecourse, lots of idiots who park all over the place, clog up the roads and make hell for the residents that live around. Anyway, it's going to rain/snow so any bets will be useless - stay strong and keep focused - one less person to make the touts richer, you CAN do this I just know you can!

Kxxxx

Hello friends,

I haven't been on for a few days as I went to Bruges with my girlfriend Joanne over the weekend. We had a great time and it was nice to spend time together and I managed to spend my money on things aside from FOBTS.

We travelled by ferry so the temptation to gamble was seldom more than a few feet away. Bingo was held on both nights in the main bar and there were roughly the same amount of machines as passengers - not to mention a casino thrown in for good measure. I am proud to say that I managed to resist the urge to gamble; an urge which I feel is already starting to reduce through my commitment.

When we were in Bruges I dreamt the streets of Manchester were equally as bereft of bookmakers! Driving home from Hull within 5 minutes I had already heard a radio advert for a high-street bookmakers and no doubt driven past countless shops.

Thank you to everybody who has left comments of support...

Chicagoguy, I am hoping that you will make the fresh start you spoke about and move into that new place. I am trying to address my problem while I am still young but I am sure that I will need support along the way from people who can relate to my compulsion. I can already say with great certainty that save for this diary I wouldn't have gone 9 days without a bet.

D123, thanks for your kind words. I am hoping that I can teach myself to think differently about gambling and not succumb to my urges. In moments of weakness I could persuade myself that my gambling wasn't destructive and that I could stop. I realise now that this is not the case. My dad taught me about gambling and he was a man beset by addiction through his adult life. I think I may have learnt my behaviours from him but that my compulsion to gamble and inability to stop comes from something much deeper and is a weakness that I must learn to manage. I think you are right about the meetings to help with my recovery and will look to attend the next one I can make (not always easy as I have 2 jobs!).

Cjdan, it is a great sporting spectacle and I am hoping that I can still enjoy it only not in the same way. Cheltenham brings back good memories for me from a punting perspective as the 2010 festival brought my greatest win. However as a compulsive gambler I need to see the bigger picture and put a stop to the misery of addiction. Good luck this week.

Kitj, thanks for your positive message. I am sure that with such great support I can remain focused as this is the happiest that I have felt in years!

Back to work in the morning but each new day is another opportunity to prove to myself that I can change.

Thanks for reading.

All the best, Myles

Myles

fella a huge welcome to the forum, it makes me fill with pride to see a new poster fully embrace the forum.

For me it helps immensely in the quest to live gamble free.

As for cheltenham this week my advice put some blocks in place, don't carry cash, your bankcards or self exclude.

Why??

This puts time between you and that first punt.

Time to think get clarity in your mind and give yourself a chance to carry on your winning streak.

Through abstinence you do become a winner, and those around you do to.

At 24 you show great maturity for that be proud.I

took another fifteen years of losing before i admitted gambling did win, it always won, beat me up time and time again .

Well no more.

One day at a time life betters.

Just for today

well done again and keep sharing.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Hi guys,

I haven't used this as much as I should have but all seems to be going well. The last bet I had was 1 March and I'm fast approaching 3 months. For me I was totally hooked as per earlier messages and I couldn't see me even getting home from work without rolling the dice in some form or other.

As time has gone on I have felt more positive about my life and the things in it. My friends don't believe me when I tell them because I was like a walking slot machine for years. I speak openly about my problem to people because I don't want to hide it. I had to hide it when I was losing and I don't think that was healthy for me.

I made a firm commitment to myself not to bet and everytime I even think about betting or odds on something I hae to reign myself back in because I know that it would cost me so much more than my stake now. My mum, brothers and girlfriend have complete trust in me now when only a few months ago there was none.

I believe it is possible to beat this compulsion but only if you can change your mindset.

Good luck everyone

Myles x

Hi Myles,

Thank you for your support on my diary it is much appreciated.

Well done on your near 3 month recovery.

Keep strong.

LG

Hello

Well yesterday was my mum's birthday and the day before was the 3 month marker without a bet.

I bought a new car last week and could only have considered this in the stable financial position I have created. As I drive around I feel that I my car (though not paid off) is the biggest result I've got from gambling. And it came through NOT putting a bet on.

I feel much happier on a personal level and I am determined to carry on abstaining because I cannot bet responsibly. I have changed my attitude to betting for good hopefully.

All the very best, Myles